1. Acquire forty U.S. Dollars.
2. Get your ass to the nearest CD store.
3. Buy the new albums from Thursday and A Perfect Circle.
4. Thank me. -Evan's away message
"Beer?! You said you want a beer, right? Or how about a rum and coke? Maybe you said that" -a drunk Dennis
Professor: "So what's your favorite 'e' word?"
Don: "Exfoliate!"
mowing the lawn.
for gods sake, its RAIN people, just RAIN!!!! remember? the unfrozen wet stuff (hehe) that falls from the sky? -Brian's away message (and it's 10 kinds of wrong lol)
Lauren: "You know? Like shammy up a pole?"
Kristin: "It's 'shimmy', you idiot!"
*picks up gallon of water off cereal shelf* "This is my favorite kind of cereal!" -Kristin
"It's Isabel - RUN YOU FOOL!!!!" -Kristin
Kristin: "Have you boarded up your windows to prepare for me?"
Random guy on payphone: "I have my pants boarded up and ready for you!"
Chick with random guy: *snatches phone* "Fuck you, bitch!"
"...You sound good! ...If you have caller ID, call me back!!" -bits of a weird voicemail message left on Kristin's phone (yay for wrong numbers)
yeah...tonsil hockey = fuN timeS but lung hockey = eW -Steen
Brian: "Well, if the power goes out your PDA's won't work"
Lauren: "PDI's"
Brian: "Yeah..PDF's...DAMMIT!! Let's go through every letter of the alphabet now!!"
*when power goes out*
"Soo I guess this means I can't do my laundry?" -Dennis, before he got drunk
"So if by 'stop' you mean 'fuck you'..." -a drunk Dennis, to Sara
logging in some community service hours by hanging out with freshman :oP
(you know i don't mean that)
(or do i) -Jeff's away message
Sara: "So I told my stalker that I'm watching porn with you"
Eric: "It beter be good porn!"
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Lauren's Drunk Quotes
Lauren: wanna go for a jog?
i want to go for a jog sooo bad
you have no idea
we should jog to wilmn
Steen: uhh...why?
Lauren: to go clubbin duh
clubbin with ma brothas
my blacktastic broathas
werd up
and pease out
Lauren: and you're like this su[erp person who is teh collest
Steen: and if you're bored...go play with dave
Lauren: he's busy!
doing the little people in the game
oh baby
Steen: lol
oh sweetie
Lauren: HEY!
i don't even remember typing "oh baby"
WAOWE
Lauren: poop is good ometimes
Steen: really?
Lauren: yes
Steen: did u just poop?
Lauren: no!
ew!
Steen: laurenpoo!
Lauren: with a prepooped fork!
a fork made out of poo!
then you could eat it too!
and not waste any plastice!
Steen: yes...don't waste the plastics
Lauren: no, because they create fossil fuels which kill the beavers and animals
and then we wouldn't have furs
and coats and socks
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rain rain, go away...
or i'll come after you with an AK-47, turn you into swiss cheese, chop off your head and stick it on a spear and display it for everyone to see, just so they know i mean business. GOT IT? now get outta here. -Brian's away message
i don't see why the advertisements make it seem like such a big thing; i personally have no problem believing it's not butter -Jeff's away message
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