FDS USERS GUIDE
(by Brian)
-Iggy saiz hi, biatch
-He uses FDS too that's because his poon stank like dead fish. And that's not a coincidence
-STINKY poon fish!
-Iggy loves FDS
-FDS is great for use in everyday settings including stank fish poon, stank fish cooch and nasty fish ass! Spray liberally over stank area and reapply to keep the foul poon stank away
-DO NOT USE if poon stank persists for more than 1 hour after emptying a whole can on that shit cuz yo' poon is way too damn stank for your own good. Kill yourself.
-If your poon itches, burns, discharges fun non-man issued goo or slaps you in the eye, consult a Brillo pad.
-FDS is not responsible if can becomes lodged in said stank poon or in nasty asshole. FDS is also not responsibe if canister bursts during use as a pseudo-dildo causing said stank poon to become 'Tore-up stank poon'
-FDS is not for all people. Consult a power washer if 2 or more inches of poon sludge resides on yo' stank bits
-Use FDS responsibly. Surgeon General's Warning: Do not FDS and Drive. FDS may cause unborn fetus to become FDS dependent and smell like man.
-Do not share FDS with others. Always use a condom while FDS'ing. FDS will kill scabies and small furry animals and may paralyze Dick Cheney.
-Avoid the clap.
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"WILL YOU PLEASE LET ME BE TOUCHED?!?" -Steen
dude, being a junior living in the dorms fuckin sucks.
P.S. Fuck you
(if by "Fuck You" i mean, "I'm grabbing a quick half hour snooze before dinner, then after that i'm off to my 6 o'clock finance class, drop me a line and i'll get back to ya!") -Jeff's away message
The great thing about having a room on the second floor is being able to throw trash out the window and into the dumpsters. Now I see why the French like it so much. -Charles's profile
once i put some pants on, u wouldn't be interested in hitting the dining hall, would u?? -Jeff
*upon talking about beer pong*
i have a feeling that if an RA were walking by there's no way they could miss the sounds of the balls -Jeff (it sounds so wrong!..)
shower of DOOM
followed by dinner of DOOM
followed by studying of DOOM
followed by...i dunno...maybe doom; not sure yet -Jeff's away message
nono..you see...i was a caffeine addicted baby
my mom did caffeine when she was pregnant with me
mostly in the form of iced tea and hot tea -Steen
Blayze: guess what time it is!
Christine: ice cream?
Blayze: close, you're getting warmer
Christine: melted ice cream?
Blayze: haha, good one
class of "I can't understand a word you say because you can't speak english" followed by class of "you're cool cuz you say fuck" followed by class of "million and 1 useless facts of americans because i forgot how to teach" followed by class of "I'm really really really old, but that won't stop me" -Blayze's away message
"...So I must be utterly inconvenienced because the lights are out in the stairwell. Big frickin deal. Grab the rail and climb." -excerpt from Erin's livejournal
"Pip pip" -Steen
"Let me put the cookie pan in my pants! Then you'll be eating cookies off my bare ass!" -Lauren
*upon being in the juice asile at Acme*
"I want joooooooooooooos!" -Lauren (it sounded like "Jews")
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The Quotebook According to Kristin:
*Steen does soap and water dance* *meanwhile Lauren claws at her stankass fish poon*
*Lauren laughs at previous quote while continuing to maul her stank fish cooch*
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*upon reading kid's book with evil character*
Professor: "So what do you think are some possible solutions?"
Don: *whispers* "Sterilization?"
i'm pretty tire
d -Brian (he meant to say "pretty tired")
"I'm not hopeless, I'm just hungry" -Jess's boyfriend John
Christine: "I'm a six-seven!"
Chris: *gasp* "Me too!"
"Is it fair to test high college students..." -typo in 451 notes
Now should be the time that I should spend reading for PHIL so that I don't horribly fail the test tomorrow. With that said I'll just burn the text instead. Happy burning. -Blayze's away message
"She's a virgin like I'm a virgin!" -Brian
late night kent, then it's homework bonanza! (that's when i watch Bonanza and think about the homework I should be doing) -Jeff's away message