Lauren: "So if your kid asked you how to smoke a bong, what would you say?"
Erin: "I'd say, 'Go ask Auntie Kristin'"
"You're so far up north you're Canadian!!" -Kristin, to Christine
Gavin: "...Is today the 21st?"
Christine: "Uh-huh"
Gavin: "Shit! I'm not supposed to be working today!!"
"..It's funny watching you drive your car cuz it's so big and you're so little...Robyn goes outside when you leave just so she can watch you pull away.." -Gavin, to Christine
Christine: "Robyn! Gavin says that I provide entertainment for you every time I drive my car!!"
Robyn: "That's cuz it's funny. But you know what's even funnier?! Coming into work when you're not even scheduled!!!!" *smacks Gavin*
Kimmer: "So are there any hot guys that work here?" (Acme)
Christine and Brianna: *in unison* "Nope"
"Ohmygod! They even have a homey in a wheelchair!!" -Kimmer
"Yeah...and they called her Canadian!!!" -Jeri
"She IMed me and said that she would be nice. And I had no clue what she was talking about, so I'm like, 'K...'" -Kimmer
"He's scruffy-looking cuz he's lonely - and dammit, that asshole never returned my phone call!! He BETTER be lonely!!" -Kimmer
"Oh...I thought you were gonna give me another 'weather' update..." -Erin
Christine: "Does anyone want any stale Pringles?"
Jeri: "Well gee, if ya put it THAT way..."
JoAnn: "I thought you were in Florida..."
Robyn: "Yeah...I'm in Florida..."
*upon seeing Kristin pour half of a bottle of ketchup on her macaroni and cheese* "It's macaroni and CHEESE, not macaroni and TOMATO - that's spaghetti!!" -Steen
"$11.07 huh? Debit exact amount - $15.00 even" -Ron
"You know...if you videotaped that, made copies and sold them around UD, you'd make a lot of money" -Dale
*upon bagging for Christine instead of being in his register, and seeing customers near his line* "No, no, no...don't go in my line...no no no - WHOO-HOO! YES!" *when customers keep on walking* -Dale, and this was a repeated process until someone actually DID come in his line...
Christine: "I need cigarettes [for a customer]"
Robyn: "What's the secret password to get behind here?"
Christine: "Yer mom"
Robyn: "Hee hee, did you say 'your mom'?" *laughs*
"Ew, he's ugly, tell him to quit smoking!" -Robyn
"No! Don't talk to him, he'll harass you" -Robyn, to Christine, about Brian
AJ: "Ok, I know how to cure you of your headache. You will need to stand very still and NOT MOVE. Then I will get a sledgehammer or a heavy beam or something - but you CAN'T MOVE..."
Christine: "But then I'll be unconscious..."
AJ: "But you won't feel your headache, now will you?"
*GASP!!* "It's a mini Slim Shady!!" -Brian
"Your car's not a boat, it's a yacht" -Gavin, to Christine
"I think Sean's nickname is 'pretty boy' " -Robyn
Gavin: "Does your car have a bench seat?"
Christine: "Yeah..."
Gavin: *gasp!* "Can I buy it?!?!"
"NO! Bad! Stop talking to him. Don't associate with him. No contact with him whatsoever!!" -Robyn
*while bagging* "No, no! You get all the vegetables and I get all the fruit... -wait- that sounded WRONG!..." -Gavin
"CERTIFIED ORGANIC" -sticker Gavin wears under his nametag
AJ: "Well, all of the fresh ones are here in the back...how does June 20th sound?"
Christine: "That was 7 days ago..."
AJ: "Hmm..ok...I KNOW there are fresh ones somewhere..."
"Ah-HA! I KNEW they were here somewhere!!!" -AJ, upon mounting all these crates of milk to get Christine her iced tea
"Yeah, my friends took a daytrip to the beach yesterday. And they ate at an All-You-Can-Eat Seafood place. And I'm like, must be nice. You're at the beach, and I'm at Acme..." -Robyn
Gavin: "Actually, guys, there's a camera staring right at us in asile 17. Smile and wave to the camera, guys!"
Brian and Christine: *smile and wave*
"C'mon, Robyn, you're an old fart and you know it!!" -Nina
"Ew. Pedophile. Tell him no." -Robyn