| "1-2-3 GO!" -Brian, when Kristin decides to be a super cautious driver at STOP signs "THERE'S A PEDESTRIAN! SEE! IF I HADN'T STOPPED I WOULDA HIT HIM!" -Kristin, the cautious driver Steen: "It must be cool to live in a beach house all year, but then where do you go on vacation?" Kristin: "I dunno, INLAND?!?" "I can't lay on my back cuz my boobs suffocate me" -Kristin "OhmyGOD, there's ANOTHER one?" -Steen, in reference to the movie Run Lola, Run Christine: "I'm done work" AJ: "Do you want a cookie for that?" Christine: "..but I gotta go home, I'm hungry" AJ: "You work in a grocery store; you're SURROUNDED by food!!!!!" David: "Do you want any plastic bags?" Christine: "Sure, I could use some" David: "Well, I don't have any" "...No, I haven't done anything. All my friends are away. *thinks* I went to Denny's" *tires to be excited about it* -Robyn "I need they key on 12, key on 12, key on 12, key on 12.." -Steve, until Robyn came with the key Survey: Car Lauren: 92 Chevy piece of shit...uh, cavalier Survey: Where were you born? Lauren: good ol' Delaware...Home of dirty rivers, weird ass people, and a whole lot of CHICKENS! (me: 'I live in Delaware' person from Midwest: 'Oh that's nice. What state is that in?') Survey: Next concert you wanna see Lauren: your mom: unplugged Mike: *while playing a computer game* "Oooh, look at that sexy chick" John: "That's you" Mike: "No, there's another one" "wimming pool" -sign on pool Steen: *to the tune of 'I Want You to Want Me'* "I want Dale to want me" Lauren: *to the same tune* "It's not gonna happen" Lauren: "I'm Stabby Spice and you are Steeny Spice!" Steen: "Then what's Kristin? CIGGY Spice?!" *Lauren makes purchases at Acme* Cashier: *excitedly* "And you saved...1 CENT!" Steen: "I have to get a shot tomorrow" Lauren: "Oh...I'm sorry..." *stabs Steen in right arm with keys* "Practice shot!!" Steen: "You're supposed to do it in the left arm!" Lauren: "I didn't want it to feel left out!" *upon seeing Fountainhead water* "Hey, it's Ayn Rand water!" -Lauren *gasp* "She's in civilian clothes!" -John Gray, to Christine, when she went to Acme Christine: "I'm stuck in 1" Pat: "That's cuz you're antisocial, and they know that" "Christine, I think the mystery shopper is going through your line, so show him lots of love & affection" -Ann Kim: "I think there's a cricket in the vent, cuz everytime the air conditioner goes on I hear one chirping" Christine: "Well, at least it's not the heater" Kim: *horrified look* Kim: *while filling up glass with filtered water* "Don't you love how yellow the water is?" *drinks water* Christine: *horrified look* Kim: "Not the filtered water!!!!!" "Oooh, I want the little Asian boy!" -Robyn, in reference to the different pictures of kids on the "Jerry's Kids" donation forms "I got a free ball!" -Pat *Kim at a loss for words* "That's a good, a good, a good...that's GOOD!!" -Kim Lauren: "I'm gonna open up a Sears charge so I can get 10% off!" Christine: "Uhh...you can't" Lauren: "Why not?!?" Christine: "You're in JCPenney" Christine: *looking at Lauren's car clock* "Hey, it's not 5:43" Lauren: "Yeah I know, I haven't fixed it" *4 minutes later* Mike: "Hey, it's not 5:47!" Lauren: "Thanks, Mike, we established that already!!!!!!!!" Lauren: "Why aren't there any shirts for $6 in here?!?" Christine: "Cuz you're in Macy's" "You look like Christopher Hall...I'm not saying that you're hot or anything, it's just your facial expressions" -Lauren, to Christine "You need a hairstyle that's more creative, original, different...ONE LIKE MINE!!!" -Kristin, to Lauren |