Hushed

 

SERIES : the Adventures of Buffy & Spike

PAIRING : Buffy/Spike

RATING : NC17

SPOILERS : major spoilers, I’ve used actual show quotes from season four of Buffy.

DISCLAIMER : I do not own these characters.

NOTES : I didn’t like season 4 with Buffy & Riley, so I rewrote it.

 

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      “That was one weird dream Will, I mean, one minute S... he was kissing me, and then next there was this girl singing. I looked back and it was this ugly guy.”

      “That is weird. You called Giles?”

      “Yeah, he asked me to stop over later, and to bring wheatiebix, apparently Spike eats solids.”

      “Oh, okay, I’ve got Wicca group, so I’ll meet you for dinner later?”

      “Sorry, I’m patrolling tonight, starting early this time, hopefully by midnight all the vamps and demons will be dead and dust and I’ll call it quits early. I’m getting SO sick of...”

      “Who was kissing you?”

      “Huh?” Buffy asked her friend, not wanting to answer her.

      “In your dream, you said someone was kissing you, who?”

      “Oh, just some random guy, I don’t know who.” She blushed thinking about the kiss; it HAD made the sun go down, that’s for sure. She thought about the other day at Giles’ with the brandy.

      “Buffy, come on, what gives? You’re blushing, that’s a ‘I’ve got a new guy’ look and I want to know, I need my vicarious smoochies.”

      “Willow, there are a lot of things that you don’t want to know about me, and THIS is one.”

      “OH COME ON! At least tell me, was it a good kiss?”

      “It was amazing.”

      “Now I HAVE to know, come on, best-friends, I’d tell you if I were seeing someone.”

      “But I’m not seeing him, I don’t even like him, not really, I don’t think, but I...”

      “You love him!” Willow exclaimed.

      “NO I DON’T! I just... I think I may be falling for him.”

      “AW! BUFFY! That’s so great!” Her friend said, “I’m all with the ‘yeah for Buffy’ and you’re less than excited. Why?”

      “It’s complicated Willow, it’s...”

      “Angel?”

      “Partially. I mean, I know it’s over, but seeing him in LA? It was like, everything came crashing back and I...”

      “You feel like you’re betraying him by moving on.”

      “That AND... who I... never mind, you have Wicca group.”

      “NO! Spill it!”

      “Willow,” she said sitting on the bed and taking Willow’s hand in her own, “I’m seriously disturbed. I’ve fallen for another winner.”

      “What? Another Parker?”

      “Worse. Another Angel.”

      “WHAT? A VAMPIRE! YOU’RE FALING FOR ANOTHER VAMPIRE? WHO?”

      “S... It’s... I can’t even say it Willow, this is so embarrassing.”

      She looked at her friend, “Buffy! You’re falling for Spike?!”

      “Yes, I’m a horrible person.”

      “No you’re not Buffy. You’re just majorly confused. Spike? Why? Since when?”

      “I don’t know. I started having these dreams after the spell, I mean, sex dreams Willow, and when I went to Spike-sit, he told me he was having them too and we just talked, and it was nice just talking.”

      “Just talking?”

      “Okay, kissing a little, but it was just... nice.”

      “Buffy, maybe you’re just substituting, Spike for Angel, I mean they are close given the whole Sire-Childe thing...”

      “That’s what I thought at first, but... it’s been a couple days, and I can’t stop thinking about him Willow, I’m seriously disturbed, I mean, it’s Spike. It can’t ever go anywhere...”

      “THAT’S IT!”

      “What?”

      “Buffy, don’t you get it... you’re jonesing for him cause he’s like Angel, and because you know it’d just be convenient, no-strings kind of thing. I mean, it’s better than a one-night stand with Parker, right?”

      “How so Willow?”

      “Well, Spike won’t give you diseases, or make you pregnant, AND if he doesn’t call, you can beat him up and not feel guilty about it, plus he’s cute.”

      “Are you telling me to use Spike for sex?”

      “Why not? Carpe diem.”

      “Carpe diem, huh? I can just hear Giles... ‘you went and fornicated with another vampire? Buffy, how could you? Sacred duty’ blah blah blah...”

      “First off Buffy, you used a big word, I’m impressed, and secondly, who cares? You have to take a chance, you know Spike is a sure thing, and it’s not like he’s got any other options... make with the smoochies and then tell me about it.”

      “WILLOW! If you’re that hard up for smoochies, you carpe diem with Spike.”

      “But he doesn’t lo... he doesn’t like me, he seems to like you. Ask him about it.”

 

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      “All you want is lots of orgasms...” Now THIS was a conversation worth listening to. He listened as little Xander weaseled his way out of that one.

      “STOP IT! Xander, I’ll need you to take Spike for a few days.”

      “What?” Xander said.

      “What?” Spike sat up.

      “What?” Anya asked.

      “I’m having a friend come to town and I’d like us to alone.”

      “Oh, you mean an orgasm friend?” Anya asked.

      “If he comes with me, he’s gettin’ tied up again.” Xander announced under Anya and Giles exchange.

      “Yes, that’s the most appalling thing you could have said.”

      “Listen, I’m not going to be tied to a chair with them shaggin’ three feet away!”

      “Hey, it’s not one of my fantasies either pal. Giles, no, we have plans... NO!”

      “No what Xander?” Buffy walked in and a sudden wave of calmness washed over him. She had a calming effect on him. “What’s going on?”

      “Buffy, I was just telling Xander I need him to take Spike for a few days my friend Olivia is coming in and I’d like NOT to have a vampire in the house.”

      “It’s an orgasm friend.” Anya said.

      “Giles, NO! Anya and I are NOT taking him, I’m not inviting him into my house so he can murder us! NO! We already made nice with one vampire and it got some people killed in case we’ve already forgotten, you remember, Miss...”

      “XANDER!” Buffy screamed. “We all remember what happened, we don’t have to rehash it every time you’ re pissed off. Angel and I made love, he went evil and killed a whole lot of people, fine, Buffy made a stupid mistake, it was my fault, but you know what? You’re dating an ex-demon. She’s killed a lot of people too, but you invite her in.”

      “That’s different Buffy and you know it.”

      “Would you stop this nonsense, the whole lot of you, I can take care of myself, I’ll find a crypt or something, don’t worry about me.” Spike said. “Soon as it’s dusk, I’ll be out of your hair.”

      “No, you won’t Spike, I’d still like to know exactly what they did and if there are gonna be a lot of other vampires like you out there. And you can’t defend yourself either, so you can stay at my house, my mom is out of town for the weekend, you can stay there. Okay? Problem solved.” She stated.

      “Buffy, Giles, I’m sorry.” Xander said.

      “It’s okay Xander, we just, we should move past it.”

      “It wasn’t your fault Buffy.” Giles said. Buffy ignored the comment and went to the kitchen as Xander and Anya left.

      “So, Giles, did you figure out anything about the gentleman?”

      “Sadly no Buffy. I’m going to the book store to do more searching, you’ll be here?”

      “For a while, I’ve got a class in a couple hours, then I’m meeting Willow for a late lunch, then I’ll come over and take the prisoner to my house. I’m aiming for an early patrol tonight, I’d like to get to bed at a reasonable hour tonight, I’ve been so worn out lately. I need a vacation.”

      “Right, we all do, perhaps a day off here and there, but those demons never cooperate.”

      “Giles! You just made a joke!”

      “Oh bloody hell.” He replied as he left, leaving the vampire and the slayer.

      She got a glass of water and leaned against the counter and Spike walked in. She held the glass up, “I swear, it’s just water! Check it if you like.”

      “I believe you.”

      “You’d think I’d learn after my recent beer fest, and the Parker thing, course I do have reasons for a drink or five... but Buffy and alcohol aren’t mixy things, I’ve made a resolution.” Call it vampire sense or whatever, but she was upset, he could tell, she blamed herself, still.

      “Slayer?”

      “Yeah?”

      “It wasn’t your fault.” He said looking at her, as her eyes darted away. “Look at me.” She didn’t. He put his hand to her cheek and made her look at him. “It wasn’t your fault.” Her eyes looked down. “It wasn’t your fault, it wasn’t your fault.” He kept repeating it until she finally looked at him and started crying. She smashed into him and he held until her crying had stopped. She pulled away, red eyes glared back at him. “There now, are you better love?”

      “I think I will be.”

      “Good. A sad slayer is a bad slayer.”

      “And a good slayer is a dead slayer right?”

      “I didn’t say that.”

      “You didn’t have to.” She hopped up on the counter. “How many times you think you’ve tried to kill me?”

      “At least five direct attempts, a few indirect ones, why?”

      “Just curious.”

      “It wasn’t your fault Buffy.”

      “Why do you do that?”

      “What?”

      “Call me Slayer and Buffy, why?”

      “I don’t know, for the same reason I called Dru, Dru and pet I suppose. Or why I called Angel, Peaches or poof.”

      “Terms of endearment?”

      “Not on my unlife would I say anything endearing about my sire.” She cracked a smile.

      “We’re crazy.”

      “What? Why?”

      “It’s so obvious Spike, can’t you feel it?”

      “What?” He asked.

      “The chemistry, the attraction... I guess Paula said it best, ‘opposites attract.’”

      “Huh?”

      “Paula Abdul, her song... never mind, it’s from the 80’s, my middle school phase with big hair and tye-dye shirts.”

      “I thought that was the 60’s and 70’s.”

      “Oh, it was, but there was a revival.”

      “We are crazy.” He said slowly moving toward her. She parted her legs and he leaned against the counter between them. She wrapped them around him and pulled him closer yet. His mouth was practically touching her own.

      “We are, definately. I mean, nothing can come of this, you still love Dru, I’m still in love with Angel...”

      “Exactly.” He said as his tongue ran over her bottom lip.

      “And fixed or not, you’re still Spike and I’m the Slayer, and we fight, that’s what we do.”

      “Right.” He said as he nibbled on her ear lobe. “And besides, we’d just be substituting each other for Angel and Dru and that’s not fair.”

      “Uh huh...” she said as he began sucking gently on her neck. “Oh God... and there’s not even... oh fuck it.” She grabbed him and plunged her tongue into his mouth. His hands found their way under her blouse, his cool fingers ran along her back and around her waist. Her hands pulled his t-shirt up out of his jeans and her hot fingers ran trails over his cool pale skin.

      Just then the door opened. “Oh bloody hell.” Giles said.

      “GILES! This isn’t what it looks like.” She said, as Spike pulled away quickly.

      “You mean it wasn’t you and Spike making out in my kitchen?”

      “Okay, maybe it is what it looks like, but it’ll never ever happen again.”

      “Right Buffy, just like you’ll forget that I had sex with your mother twice.”

      “You shagged the Slayer’s Mum? Hey, good for you!” He said.

      “Buffy, you have...”

      “Responsibilities, sacred duties that I can’t take lightly because the safety of the world rests in my hands and blah blah blah, I’ve heard it.” She said rolling her eyes and drinking her water.

      “Aparently not enough Buffy. Now as the Slayer, you have a duty to slay vampires, not... whatever it is you did with Angel and certainly not with Spike.”

      “Sure, you’re all... ‘go ask Angel for help’ but when the chips are down, you’re all ‘stake him Buffy, he killed my girlfriend.’ Then you’re all ‘take Spike in for information’ but now it’s not okay to be friends? Why don’t you decide what you want and let me know, cause I’m tired of having to guess everyone’s wants, just write a list of things Buffy can or can’t do. I can’t date according to you, cause I’m the Slayer. So then I find someone who can relate to that and you say no. He says yes, I say yes, so we are together, then he changes his mind and says no, and tells me to have a normal life. Then I find a normal guy, who uses me, and you tell me I can’t date, that it got in the way cause I was a little sad afterward. Well? Where’s the normal life Giles? I can’t have a normal life and be the Slayer, it doesn’t fit. I’m carpe dieming Giles! I’m lonely and I have needs, I’m in college now and can’t find a decent guy because I can’t explain the fact that I can’t meet him for dinner cause I’m out slaying.”

      “Are you quite finished?” Giles asked. Spike felt her anger, her sadness, he felt it, he smelled it. He’d always been good at the human emotions. He was the pain in her eyes. Normally he’d be all happy about the Slayer feeling pain, but this? Now? HIS Slayer was in pain. His Slayer? He didn’t know what was going on, but he knew he had to make her feel better, somehow.

      “Yes, quite finished.” She said.

      “Good, sit.” She was about to protest, but rethought it and sat down. “I can see how this would be confusing for you Buffy, you’re not a normal girl by any means, Slayer or not you’re a remarkable person, but you can’t forget the fact that Spike does NOT have a soul, he IS NOT Angel, and I think if you trick yourself into believing that, you’ll be worse off than when Angel left. And I... I worry about you, not just from an ex-watcher perspective, but because you’re like the daughter I never got to have. I know what sacrifices I made to be a watcher, I didn’t get to have a relationship or children, cause my first duty is to you. You weren’t called until much later than you should have been and I’m sorry. I can only imagine what it must be like, but you are indeed the Slayer, and you have a duty to the people of this world, to be selfless and help them.”

      “Giles, I’m not replacing Angel. He’s irreplaceable, I just want to... I don’t know.” She glanced at her watch. “SHIT! I’m going to be late for class, I gotta go, I’ll come back later to move you Spike, and Giles, don’t worry.” She said, running out the door, leaving the vampire and the watcher.

      Giles looked at him, “Sit.” He said and Spike obeyed. “Spike, I don’t have to remind you that Buffy is a child. She may be in college, but she’s been hurt, and she doesn’t need you. I don’t care what you’re telling her, I’ll only say this once. Stay away from her. She doesn’t need you using her, and if you don’t stay away, I’ll stake you myself.” Giles started to stand up.

      “Now hold on just a bloody minute. She’s not a child, she knows what she wants, and you have no idea how hurt she is. You’re blind if you think she’s over everything that happened. She cried on me for twenty minutes after you left about the bloody poof. She blames herself, and I don’t see any of you stopping it. She needs love now more than anything, and you’re just taking it away from her.”

      “As opposed to you? Are you telling me you love her?” Spike’s eyes darted down. “Bloody hell.” Giles said. “I think I’d like a scotch.” He sat down and Spike gradually looked up to meet his watchful stare, he understood where he got the job title from. “Be honest with me.”

      “Honesty? Honesy is so overrated these days.”

      “Spike!”

      “Okay, fine, I love her, I always have. She’s spunky and gorgeous and sweet. She’s smart and she doesn’t even know it.”

      “You sure you aren’t just being a deceitful childe?”

      “NO. This has nothing to do with Angelus, the first time I saw her I didn’t even know she was with him, and I still wanted her. Sure I’ve tried to kill her, and she’s tried to kill me, but... I can’t explain it, I just know I want her.”

      “Lust, not love... you want her, you love Drusilla.”

      “No. Yes. It’s complicated Watcher, but I don’t want to hurt her. I won’t leave like the poof did. I don’t have a soul to lose, and maybe that’s bad, but it doesn’t mean I can’t love or don’t love. Love isn’t regret or remorse or guilt Watcher, the demon doesn’t get love, it makes you live guilt free, not love free. I love Drusilla, but it’s over, I loved my Sire, but it’s over, and now I’m, I’d like to move on. I won’t leave her, if she’ll have me, I’ll stay, she won’t be lonely.”

      “And what of the chip? What if you get a chance to be the way you were?”

      “What about it?”

      “She’d be wrapped up with you in a relationship and she’d have to stake her lover, AGAIN.”

      “That won’t happen.”

      “Why on Earth not?”

      “Cause, let’s look at this straight, those soldier boys aren’t going to change me back if I begged them. This was a project, and a successful one but it’s over, I escaped. And even if I did find a way to fix it, it doesn’t mean I HAVE to kill.”

      “Are you saying you’d stop killing?”

      “I’m saying I don’t have to kill to feed. And there are plently of murderers and rapists out there that deserve a good scaring and life altering experience. But that’s not even in the now.”

      “You’re treading on thin ice here William.” Spike looked up at the watcher. He hadn’t been called that in a while, and usually because Dru was mad. “You hurt her, and you’ll die, and if I can’t give you a slow and painful death, I’m sure Angel could help me out. He may have left, but he still does love her.”

      “I know.”

 

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      “Okay, I’ve gotta go and get Spike out of the house before Giles’ friend shows up.”

      “Okay Buffy, are you gonna stay at your mom’s tonight, with Spike?”

      “WILLOW!”

      “I just want to know if I should worry if you’re not here.”

      “No, don’t worry.”

      “So you are going to stay with him.”

      “I’m saying that I’m not sure, but you shouldn’t worry, okay?”

      “Okay. See you later or tomorrow. Have fun.”

      “Okay, come here.” Buffy grabbed her friend for a hug. “You’re the best Willow, thanks.”

      “Just be careful Buffy, I don’t wanna see you get hurt again.”

      “You got it. Later.” She walked out the door and within minutes was at Giles opening the door. “Giles? I’m here... hey!” Spike walked out from the back room and she automatically felt better. “Where’s Giles?”

      “He went to pick up last minute stuff.” He walked over to the couch and jumped on it, laying down. “He’s a right horny bastard I think.”

      “Yeah well, it’s been a long time for him I guess, he gets lonely since Miss. Calendar died. He needs a woman in his life, hanging out with kids and vampires kinda gets to him.” She stood at the end of the couch. “Well?”

      “Well what Slayer?”

      “Come on, I don’t have all night, and I have to patrol.”

      “I know where your house is, I’ll go.”

      “But it’s locked, so I have to unlock it and invite you in.”

      “I’m already invited, remember tea with your mum?”

      “Yeah  but we revoked the invite since you came back looking for that damn ring.”

      “Oh, right, the ring.”

      “Yeah, the ring. And might I say,” she walked over to him and hit him upside the head.

      “WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR?”

      “Why’d you do that to poor Harmony?”

      “What?”

      “Two guesses, one goes grrr...”

      “OH HEY! I didn’t turn her, I found her in an alley when I got here. She was sobbing uncontrolably and I thought she’d be an easy meal, but she vamped out instead. She doesn’t even know how to hunt properly, poor thing. I took her with me.” He sat up. “I helped her.”

      “Oh then I take the hit back.” She nodded matter-of-factly. “Did she tell you how she got turned?”

      “She said something about graduation but I didn’t listen.”

      “Oh, that’s nice Spike. Poor girl went through enough, and you go and be mean? She told us about staking her, how could you do that to her?”

      “Making nice with the vampires are you?”

      “Well, it’s not like she can defend herself, she doesn’t want to break a nail.”

      “I think you’re jealous, that’s what I think.” He got up and took the remaining blood bags from the refridgerator.

      “Jealous? Of Harmony? AS IF! I wasn’t in high school and I certainly am not now. She’s the vampire, not me, I just feel bad. She was a prissy girl in high school and she makes an even prissier vamp. That’s all I’m saying, you should’ve just shown her a little respect. She loved you.”

      “No, she didn’t Slayer. She grabbed the first guy with power and latched on for the ride.”

      “Well, she was voted most likely to marry a man with influence, not that you’re a man, nor do you have influence, but...”

      “Thanks, I feel so much better about myself. Let’s go.” He threw his duster on and grabbed her hand and pulled her out the door. It felt nice, holding someone’s hand. She looked at him while they walked and he looked over at her. “What?”

      “Nothing.” She smiled, she was so beautiful when she smiled. He had thought about what Giles had said long and hard. Would he give up killing for her? He looked back at her again. Yes, he would, she was worth it. If he had the choice, he would. He was such a wussy, just like the bloody poof. “What?” She asked.

      “Nothing.” He stopped and pulled her to a park bench. “Sit down here.”

      “Okay. What?”

      “I was thinking that you and me...”

      “Save it, it’s not going to work, that’s okay, I’ve been shot down before. Afterall we are mortal enemies, it’s fine, whatever.” She looked away. He could tell she was fighting back the tears.

      “No, that’s not it at all.” He put his hand on her chin and leaned in to her. Their lips met for a gentle kiss. “I was thinking that you and me is going to be complicated for a number of reasons. Not just the obvious, but because of Angel and Dru, and your friends and your watcher and because... never mind, you jus...”

      “NO. Because why?”

      “Nothing... it’s not important.”

      “Yes it is, it is to me, tell me.”

      “It’s going to be complicated because I...” he looked away, “because I may be falling for you, correction, I have fallen for you which could complicate things for me if you’re just interested in a more physi...” she grabbed him and kissed him gently until he gradually opened his mouth to hers and their tongues dueled.

      She pulled away, “Well, then it’ll just be complicated because I’ve fallen for you too Spike.”

      “Really?”

      “Yes.” He took her hand and got up. “We are crazy, crazier than your crazy ex-girlfriend, and she was pretty crazy.”

      “Yeah she was, but let’s not talk about her.”

      “Fine, but we should deal with the Angel issue.”

      “What Angel issue?”

      “The fact that I still do love him.”

      “I still love Dru, but it’s over, she made that clear. And Angel isn’t an issue, for me, unless you have some issues.”

      “Well, you are his... for lack of better term, his son, and you hate him and...”

      “And wouldn’t the best revenge be taking the love of his unlife?”

      “Well, as long as you brought it up, yes.”

      “I can’t say that it’s not highly satisfying knowing that he loves you and you’re here with me, but that’s not the reason. I wanted you the first minute I saw you, and that was before I knew the poof was with you.”

      “Oh. Okay.” They got to the door. “Okay, go on in, and I’ll see you later.”

      “Hey!” He grabbed her arm and pulled her closer. “Where are you going?”

      She was so close to him, he could feel her heart through his clothes. “I’m going to patrol. Remember? Big bad vampires out there to be dusted? Big demons hurting people? Sacred duty? Sound familiar?”

      “Just stay here with me tonight.” He said, kissing her neck lightly.

      “I can’t, I have to patrol.”

      “Then I’ll come with you.”

      “To do what? Watch?”

      “I can be an extra set of eyes.”

      “If you want to fine, but stay out of the way, I don’t want you getting hurt.”

      “I won’t get hurt Buffy, I’m already dead.”

      “Oh right, I seriously need to have my head examined.”

      “Why’s that love?” He wrapped his arm around her waist as they walked toward the cemetery.

      “Cause I must have a thing for dead guys.”

      “Undead guys.”

      “Right. Does that make it better?”

      “I suppose not, but I wouldn’t dwell on it.”

 

      Three hours and several vampires later, Buffy and Spike walked hand in hand up the stairs of her house. “Man, what’s up with the forces of evil? I swear, last night there was nothing, not even a rabid racoon, and tonight? Five vampires and two demons.” She flopped down on her bed and he stood in the doorway watching her. “Spike?” She sat up, “What are you looking at?”

      “A beautiful blonde Slayer.”

      “Oh, anyone I know?” He walked over and stood in front of her.

      “You may have heard of her, she’s a great fighter, and rumor has it, she has stopped the world’s end quite a few times.”

      “Well, someone should really buy that girl a diamond necklace, and some pearls.”

      “That they should.” He bent over and their lips collided. She pushed his duster off his shoulders and leaned back on the bed as she pulled him with her. He was on top of her and his tongue was probing her mouth, running along the tops of her teeth, and dueling with her tongue. One hand found it’s way under her shirt and she gasped at the feel of his cool fingers. She got his shirt out of his jeans and pulled it off him. He unbuttoned her shirt and opened it to blaze a trail of cool kisses from her neck to her navel. He rolled off her and laid still.

      “Spike?” She asked. She was scared, did he not want her? Was she that repulsive? “Spike?”

      “Maybe we shouldn’t.” He said, and she could see his chest moving up, he was breathing. She didn’t understand, maybe just an automatic reaction?

      “You don’t want to.” She said, pulling her shirt closed while sitting up. She was in for another night in the shower.

      “That’s not it.” He looked at her and put his hand on her cheek, his thumb wiping away a tear. “That’s not it, don’t even think that. I just, I don’t want to take advantage of you.”

      She kissed his hand and she removed her shirt completely and unhooked her bra and let it fall. She watched his eyes light up at the sight of her, she’d never felt so alive. She took his hand and put it on her breast. “You’re not taking advantage of me.” She leaned down and kissed his chest gently. He pulled her hair tie out and her hair fell around her as his hands continued their exploration of her body.

      God he wanted this, but he didn’t want to scare her, he didn’t want to hurt her. He was nervous, why? He shouldn’t be. He’d been with a hundred other girls, but being with her made him nervous. She stood up and he sat up and watched as she unbuttoned her jeans and let them slide down her legs to the floor. She kicked them away and slid down her panties and they joined her jeans in the a pile on the floor. She was blushing, she was nervous too. She walked over to him and he slid his hands up her thighs to her waist and she shivered. She backed away and he was memorized by her as she went over to her dresser and began taking candles out from a drawer. She placed them around the room and he watched her body, entranced. His jeans were excrutiatingly tight and he wanted nothing more than to rip them off, but he didn’t want to scare her. He knew her experience was limited to once with Angel and once with that other fellow. She turned back to him as she lit the last candle and turned off the light. She was a goddess in the candle light. She stalked over to him and grabbed his hands and pulled him up.

      She had been hoping he’d get undressed too, but he didn’t and she wondered why. “Spike?” She asked cautiously.

      He cleared his throat, “Huh? What?”

      “What’s wrong?”

      “Hmm? Nothing.”

      “You don’t want me? It’s okay, just say it before I make an even bigger fool out of myself.”

      “You’re not making a fool out of yourself.” His beautiful blue eyes looked down into her green ones and he could drown himself in her, he wanted to.

      “Well, I’m trying to seduce you and it doesn’t seem to be working.” She said and he silenced her with a deep kiss.

      He took her hand and placed it over his jean-covered erection. “I beg to differ. It is very much working.” She blushed. “I just don’t want to go too fast with you Buffy, I don’t want to scare you.”

      “You’re not scaring me. I’m not a child. I’ve done this before.”

      “Yeah twice.”

      “So?” She asked, running her hands over his chest, her fingers were so warm. He’d dreamt of this moment so many times, he should be buried inside her by now. He was more than ready to plunder her, but he didn’t want to do that. Her fingers found his jean zipper and she pushed then down and she gasped. She had just found out that he didn’t bother with boxers, ever. She looked up at him blushing. He kicked the jeans away.

      “I just want to make sure you’re sure.” He explained.

      “I’m sure.” She turned him around and crawled back on the bed, and he followed suit, running his tongue up her leg, over her thigh. She parted her legs and moaned as he ran his tongue over her slit before his thumbs pulled her soft folds gently apart and his tongue found it’s way inside her cavity. “Oh my God!” She whimpered, arching into him as he moved his tongue in and out, while his index finger played with the small pink bundle of nerves. Her muscles began clentching around him and he felt her hands in his hair, holding him, pushing him closer to her as she came. He gently kissed her thighs as she calmed down, her breathing slowly leveled out. “Spike?”

      “Yes pet?”

      “Make love to me.” He kissed his way up her body to her neck and sucked on it gently while he positioned himself for entry. Her hands slid down his body and he gasped as he felt warm fingers surround his straining cock as she guided him inside her. The pentration was slow, excrutiatingly slow and he felt her muscles stretching around his girth. She was so tight, he felt like he was burning inside her. He closed his eyes and just reveled in the feeling of being inside her when she squeezed him. He groaned and she realized what she had done and she did it again, that time eliciting a growl. She giggled as she thrust her hips up to his. That was the clentcher, he began moving in and out of her, slow at first, but the pace quickened. At first she moved with him, but then discovered if she moved against him, it was much more intense. When he thrust down, she went up and he was sure he was bumping her cervix.

      As their passion increased, neither noticed the escape of a blue fog from their mouths’. His hand slid down her body and pinched her nubbin as her nails scratched down his back. He exploded inside her as she came and he was surprised she didn’t scream. He collapsed on top of her and she continued rubbing his back, as he kissed her neck. She rolled them over and fell asleep on his chest.

 

------------------------------

 

      The first thing she noticed when she began to wake up was the lack of sun in the room. She yawned and smiled remembering what had happened. Spike! She rolled over, and he was there. She snuggled up next to him and felt his hand wrapped around her waist. She rested her head on his chest and her finger drew letters on the pale skin lightly. She didn’t want to wake him, well, she did, but he needed his sleep. She closed her eyes. The past two times she had fallen asleep after making love, the guy hadn’t been there in the morning. Spike was. She wondered if he liked being called William. Spike just seemed so... awkward to call your boyfriend. Boyfriend? Yes, he was her boyfriend, she would have to talk to him more about that when he woke up.

      She thought back to the night before. She’d never had the chance to really look at a male before, with her and Angel it had been so tender and gentle, and he was basically just given her pleasure and then had been gone before she woke up. She peeled back the covers slowly and had almost revealed his penis when his hand grabbed her wrist. He scared her. She looked up at him and he was smiling eyes still closed. ‘You jerk.’ What? She tried clearing her throat, ‘You... you...’ she couldn’t hear her own voice. ‘Spike? Spike? Can you hear me?’

      He had been awake for quite sometime, since the sunrise, when he felt it creep in through the blinds. He’d jumped up quickly to close them and hadn’t been able to go back to sleep. She was wonderful, she was the best thing that happened to him. ‘Morning love.’ What? ‘Morning love... Buffy?’ He sat up quickly and could see the scared look on her face. ‘Buffy?’ She shook her head.

      ‘Can you hear me?’ She mouthed. He shook his head. ‘We can’t talk.’ She said, she was scared, she started crying. He pulled her close to him and she latched onto him. The phone rang and she ran over to pick it up. ‘Hel...’ she shook her head and just hung up the phone. ‘Giles.’ She mouthed and he nodded his head. She went to the closet and picked out a pair of khaki’s and a light blue shirt. He got dressed quickly and drank some blood while she had toast. She sat across from him at the table, looking scared. He wished he could tell her how much he loved her. He noticed a pad of paper and pen and he wrote on it and gave it to her. She smiled and mouthed to him, ‘I love you too.’

      She got up and cleaned up the dishes. He wrapped his arms around her waist from behind and she leaned back. He kissed her neck gently at first, but then began sucking and gently nipping at her skin. She wrapped her arm around his neck and he could hear her crying. She turned around and he hugged her for a while. ‘Ready?’ She asked and he nodded. He grabbed his duster and threw it over his head and they ran to Giles’ house quick.

 

------------------------------

 

      “AAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!” She watched as their heads exploded and it was over.

      “Buffy!” Riley ran over to her and helped her up. “You’re hurt, are you okay?”

      “Yeah, just a little jab in the back, I’ll be fine.”

      “Okay, I hate to run, but I’ve gotta go, bye.” She stood up and dusted herself off.

      “Well, nice of him to be concerned about a helpless girl.” She said wiping some of the goop from her jacket.

      “You’re anything but, cutie.” She spun around and Spike was leaning against the wall at the top of the stairs.

      “What a nice voice to hear.”

      “I was thinking the same thing Slayer. I smell blood, are you okay?” He walked over to her, he was worried.

      “Yeah I’m fine, a little winded, and one of those guys stabbed me in the back, but I’m moving so he didn’t get my spine, I’ll be... ahh!” She moaned as she twisted the wrong way.

      “You’re not okay Slayer, you should go to the hospital.”

      “It’s fine, just a litte pain, nothing I haven’t felt before.” She winced as they started down the stairs.

      “You’re stubborn as hell, you’re going to the hospital and I’m taking you.” He looked at her back, there wasn’t a lot of blood as blood went, but there was a stain on her coat.

      “It’s nothing, I’m sure it looks worse than it is, I’ll just take a shower and I’ll be fine.”

      “You’re impossible.”

      “You got that right.” They held hands and walked toward the dorms. “I wanna check on Will.”

      “Huh?”

      “Willow.”

      “Oh, right.”

      “When did you start going by Spike?”

      “Around the time the bloody wanker left Dru and I for her.”

      “Her?”

      “Darla. He was supposed to meet her, and I didn’t like her, and she didn’t take kindly to Dru and I, so we split. Angelus refused to call me that, he insisted on calling me boy or Will, or anything that would make me feel inferior, which always worked.”

      “Oh, that whole sire-childe thing huh?”

      “Yeah, and he was a right mean bastard. The vampire that was here chasing after you was NOT my sire.”

      “Of course he was, what are you talking about?”

      “He was NOT my sire, the vampire that was here, was nice, my sire was anything but. He wouldn’t have let you live as long as you did and he would NOT have tried ending the world like he did. He liked the world, he knew the importance of keeping people around and the power we held over humans, the vampire that was here recently was not MY sire.”

      “Oh. Lucky for us, huh?”

      “Certainly, I wouldn’t have survived him if he had been MY sire.”

      “Then lucky for us.” He followed her up to her dorm room and the door was open. “That’s funny, Willow would never leave the door open.

      “She would if she was being chased by big ugly demon guys.” Willow announced walking up behind them.

      “WILLOW! I was worried! Hi.” Buffy said to the blonde stranger.

      “H-h-hi.”

      “Buffy, this is Tara, a friend from Wicca group, Tara, this is Buffy and Spike.”

      “S-s-spike, that’s an odd n-n-name.”

      “It’s a nickname of sorts, please to meet you.”

      “You were at your mom’s last night right Buffy?”

      “Yes Willow.” Buffy and Spike walked in the room and sat down on her bed. Buffy listened to her friend in the hallway.

      “You can come in Tara.”

      “No, you can b-b-be with your friends, I’ll go.”

      “Okay, I’ll call you tomorrow?”

      “Okay.”

      Willow walked in. “She’s shy.”

      “She seems nice Willow.”

      “Yeah, she’s a real witch. We did a spell, tellycanisus, to block the door when the gentleman were after us. She’s so powerful, I bet she’s been practicing for a while. What happened with the gentleman anyway?”

      “Oh, I followed one of the lackies to the clocktower. It basically turned into a brawl, those suckers were strong, but I managed to get upstairs. OH! And Riley? From class? He’s a commando guy.”

      “WHAT? Riley?”

      “Yeah, nice normal Riley is a commando. Go figure, anyway, we broke this little music box thing that I saw in my dream and my voice came back and I screamed and they exploded.”

      “And she got stabbed in the back.” Spike added.

      “You got stabbed Buffy?”

      “It’s no big deal, it barely broke the skin, on the scale of things of importance on the Buffy scale, it’s pretty low. I should go to Giles’ and give him the update, and then I wanna soak in a hot bath for an hour at least.”

      “Want company?” Spike asked and Willow giggled.

      “SPIKE!”

      “Oh Buffy, please, I had sex in my bed one time when you were right over the... oops, did I say that outloud?” Willow said when Buffy turned to look at her.

      “YOU WHAT? Right there, when I was right here?” She said pointing between the two beds.

      “We were quiet, not like you.”

      “What are you talking about Willow?”

      “Oh please, I heard you and Parker from the elevator, that’s how I knew not to come in.”

      “Oh. Well I was quiet last night.”

      “Cause you didn’t have any voice.”

      “Well, whatever.”

      “Look, I’m going to go make sure Tara is okay, I’ll see you in class tomorrow?”

      “Yeah, class, see you then.” Willow left and she turned her attentions on Spike. She slipped off her coat and cringed at the slight pain in her back.

      “SEE! You’re hurt.”

      “I’m sure it’s nothing, don’t worry so much, it’s givin’ me a wiggins.”

      “What?”

      “It’s creepy, you’re Spike, you’re not supposed to be so paternal and caring.”

      “You never saw me with Dru, not really, I’m a big fluffy puppy.”

      “Right.”

      “Can I see it?” He asked, not wanting her to take it the wrong way, but her shirt was stained and he was concerned. She touched his cheek with her hand and turned as she took her shirt off. “It doesn’t look that bad, but it looks a half inch deep or so. You should wash it off.”

      “Is it still bleeding?” She asked hesitantly.

      “A little, not too much.” He didn’t want to touch it, but she should clean it. He shouldn’t touch it, but he wanted to, the demon inside was screaming at him, the bloodlust choked him and he stood up growling in game face.

      “What?”

      “I’ll see you back at your house, wash it off.” He said and started for the door but she caught his arm.

      “Don’t go,” she said softly, putting a hand on his cheek, “wait for me.”

      “NO!”

      “What’s wrong?”

      “Nothing,” he mumbled looking away from her.

      “Clean it for me.” She said and his eyes jumped to hers. “Clean it off, you won’t be hurting me, so you shouldn’t get zapped.” He looked down to the floor again. He wanted to, but he didn’t want her to think that’s what he expected from her.

      “No.” He pulled his arm away from her and left. She sat down on her bed for a few minutes before putting her shirt back on and leaving.

 

 

~El Fin~

 

 

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