You are looking at the newest edition of my contribution to the digital world in which we live.  I'm going to take a minute of your time to take a guess as to why you are here.  Here are the possible reasons for your presence:

1.) You are an interstellar traveller on an eternal hunt for fiery websites of death.

2.) You ran a search for the name 'Caleb' and this is what you came up with.

3.) You are a friend/acquaintance of one of my brothers, thus you've heard stories about "my dork brother and his super-computer of death" and want to see pictures of it.

4.) I stealthily gained access to your computer and set this as your homepage of death.

5.) You lost a bet. (...of death) Not a hidden link

Well, how close did I come?  I know you have to fall into one of those categories! Don't deny it.  Seriously, quit denying it!  Sorry.

    Back to the issue at hand, homepages have a tendency to lack a thesis and gradually lull the reader into a state of mental numbness the essence of which cannot be captured with words alone.  My page is no different.  I will play word games, spewing out my wit in well-built and ordered sentences filled to the brim with jibberish.  Tom-foolery.  That's what this page is; bally-hoo crunched down into binary, fired across miles of Cat5, picked up by your computer where the little 1's and 0's explode into a screen chock-full of craziness!  I applaud you for lasting this long.  But I've digressed...

    As per usual, I have links to the other, more interesting areas of my site.  Feel free to come back to the front page frequently via the link @ the bottom of each page.  Doing this will make the content of the rest of my site seem painfully interesting, sooooo interesting in fact, that you'll more than likely pee your pants with excitement.  If you should fall victim to this fate, do not be ashamed, for it is a perfectly natural response.  On with the silliness!

    - NEW!!! Christmas is just around the corner, so I thought it only appropriate to list the things you all have to
      get me for Christmas.  If you follow the happy little link below, you can play Santa and buy me some
      sweet gear!  Remember, money is no object, so you shouldn't mind spending it all on me!!!
     

    - My computer would like to say hello to you all.  If you would like to see my computer.  Click on
      the link.  "Where's the link?" you ask.  Well I'm glad you asked.  I took the liberty of hiding it from
      you.  It's here, you just have to look around for it.  I'll give you a hint:  You already passed it.     

    - The next link is a little unleashing of fury that I cannot hide behind closed doors.  Doing so would
      cause my anger to compress into such a tight-knit ball that eventually its own gravity would force it
      to implode, taking me with it. Click on the little icon if you're still interested... 
     

    Last, but CERTAINLY not least is a man we all know and love.  His presence has been the
      foundation of this web page since it's inception.  He commands armies of beautiful, naked,
      big-breasted women from his pedestal of magnificence.  His glory is so brilliant that to look upon
      him with anything short of a welding mask would fry the eyeballs clean out of your head!!!  I'm
      honored to bring to you Cousin Ffej...
     * Warning:  Ladies, please sit back from the monitor.  It is rumored that Jeff is so potent that
         even being close to his image could get you pregnant.
     

    - Just kidding about that last thing...this is what Ffej REALLY looks like.

updated 1/21/03

You are pathetic loser # to visit my site!!!

As always, you can e-mail me anytime, or you can see if I'm on Instant Messenger as "cpull32".