Another Day With the Cap'n
Third in "The Cap'n and Me", series commissioned by Cap'n Jimmy's Co., by Richard Flontley
So you've slept it off. Congratulations. You went head-to-head with the Cap'n and came out on top. Treat yourself to another bottle. It burns all the way down, but that's the burn of victory. Enjoy it while you can. Don't give up now! You're so close! Halfway there. That custom blend comes from grains harvested by some of the best-trained illegal immigrants in Louisiana. The recipe was created by my grandfather at the family mansion and honed in the state penitentiary for five years. It's been passed down through the generations. Drink up, and ignore that rending pain in your gut and the steady throbbing at your temples. You may feel it tomorrow, but you'll sure enjoy it today. You've earned it.
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Surgeon General's Warning: Cap'n Jimmy's Authentic Scotch may cause brain injury, seizures, blindness, gastritis, liver disease, cancer, or a bad rash. Do not drink Cap'n Jimmy's before driving, boating, or operating heavy machinery. In fact, you're probably better off staying away from the stuff altogether. |
