Attention! the following is an interview with the mysterious bat boy. before you go on, you must relize that bat boy is an insensitive prick that will lash out at you if you offend him in any way.
Warning! bat boy is very sensitive. if you offend him with any kind of offensive name calling, he will beat you severely. don't let bat boy's appearance get in the way your friendship. he is extremely ugly, putrid smelling, and eats raw cow hide. we must also be extra careful not to let any sort of light get on bat boy, because of his sensitive skin. this also means that there is no flash photography allowed. bat boy does think of himself as being sexy and will probably strip during the show. this means that you should not hoot and howler at him, because i am sure that all of you think he is so sexy, because he is afraid of loud noises. bat boy is also very aggressive because of his addiction to booze, vitamin c pills, steroids, and asprin, which also means that bat boy will be using a lot of profanity, which will be blocked out as best as possible.
sugarpop (director person): well bat boy, since this is your show, i think that i will let you talk about yourself and give the people a full biography of your life.
bat boy: well, sugarpop, all of this fu*kin' sh*t started when my mother, which is my sister started to fu*k my dad. that is how the fuc*ked up piece of s*it, as in refering to me, came out. my mother never breast fed me because i would always bite her nip*les. that made her real fu*kin' pissed off and usually kicked my a*s. that's when i would start fuc*in' bi*chin' at her. my mother was also a prostitute. my father was a h*rny motherfu*ker. he would have sex every fuc*in' night till his di*k almost fell off. my uncle would go to the children's playground and usually try to steal a six year old and molest the fu*k out of whoever he got. my beggining childhood was very fuc*ed up. i had sex addicts everywhere and at age four, i was already shootin' it up. every night i would get high along with my mother. she was one fu*ked up women, until i jammed my razor-sharp di*k up her pu*sy. she eventually died of a heart attack from an overdose of c*m goin' in her mouth and she also drank a little too much booze. she died when i was only three years old. my younger brother and me were always fingering each other, but that got old when i punctured his anal tube. that motherfu*ker just wouldn't stop sh*tin', so me and my dad took him out to the backyard, and shot him. after he started going into convulsions, we got mad. the motherfu*ker just wouldn't die, so we decided to throw compost on him. he eventually died of the fumes. we decided to take him out to the burning pit and set him ablaze. he wouldn't stop burning so we had to throw some dog sh*t on him. next my parents shipped me off to harvard at eight years old. when i got there i started bangin' all of the teachers. they called it sexual harassment so i killed them for making fun of my mother. that's when i went to jail. while in jail i would always bend over to pick up my soap while i was in the shower. i just loved havin' all that sh*t go up my a*s that the other people taking showers put up there. when i raped everone in jail, i decided that it was time to go home. when i got home, i realized that we moved to a farm. the only thing that i can remember about the farm is that all of the animals had nice tight as*es. next, i was put in a freak show. that is where i met my first true lover, elephant man. that motherfu*ker was probably the best thing that i ever banged. damn, he was sexy bi*ch. i wish i could be fu*kin' him right now, though i killed him when he wouldn't give me any head, plus i got him pregnant. later, i was discovered by people that wrote up tabloids. well, sugarpop, that is my whole life.
sugarpop: thank you very much bat boy. that was very touching. if there is anyone out in the audience that would like to ask bat boy a question, please do so.
sillyman (audience): hey, bat boy, why the fuc* do you think your so attractive, when your really just some fu*kin' hor*y a*s motherfu*ker?
bat boy: fu*k you a*shole. you know what, motherfu*ker? you can suck my di*k.
sillyman: you sick sh*t. i ain't gonna suck your motherfu*kin' di*k. what are you, some crazy as* nig*er.
bat boy: that's it you piece of sh*t. i'm gonna kick your a*s.
sillyman: bring it bit*h. ow, you stupid motherfuck*r, quit biting my dic*!
pow! punch! zing! whap! zork! kapow!
sillyman: owwwww! i'm in fu*kin' pain, you stupid n*gger. get the fu*k off me. ow shi*, my arm!
sugarpop: we're sorry for this, but the show has to end now. good bye!
this is extremely rare footage of bat boy and elephant man during their very strange ways of sexual pleasures.