Erik’s music room was the most amazing thing I had ever laid eyes on.  The first thing I noticed was the beautiful and intricate pipe organ that took up the entire far wall.  I could just see Erik sitting at it in the candlelight, playing all alone, no one to hear.  I wanted to get a closer look at it, but after a few steps, my attention drifted to the walls that flanked it.

    Each wall was split in half, the upper part bookshelves.  I examined them closer and saw that they were full of musical scores.  I had never dreamed that a single individual could have so much music.  Opera, orchestra, musicals, solos for voice and organ.  It was amazing.  Below the scores were musical instruments of all varieties.

    I sighed quietly when I drifted past a fine viola, lovingly displayed.  I let my fingers brush the strings listening to the faint hum they gave of.  The feel and sound was familiar, even on this strange instrument, and hundreds of feet below the Paris Opera, thousands of miles from my home.  I was suddenly a little homesick and feeling nostalgic. 

    I looked up and saw my erstwhile host watching me. “I used to play.  I was good, too, but I had to give it up.  No money for lessons, or an instrument.  Gods, that was forever ago.  I didn’t even realize how much I missed it.”  The last sentence applied more to my entire past than my musicianship.

    I looked at the viola again and it seemed a symbol of my entire past.  Sorcha, you are entirely messed up!  Here you are, on your greatest adventure ever and you’re pining for a home that really only existed in your head anyway.

    “You can play it now, if you like,” he offered.  I considered it and turned away from the shelf and from contemplation of my ragged past.  There was no point.  Live for today, Sorcha, remember.

    “Thanks, no.”  I shook my head.  “I’m so out of practice, I’d probably break your instrument!  The only thing I’ve used to make music for a long time is my voice.”

    Erik looked at me strangely for a moment then snapped right back into himself.  I wondered if it hadn’t just been a trick of the candlelight. “So, you sing then?”

    “Yes.”  Then I remembered that we were below the opera, and singing on my caliber would probably be more painful on his ears than the squealing of an un-oiled hinge.  “I’m not trained in it, or anything,” I added, quickly, “but I’ve been making my living by singing in the streets for about three years.”

    “Would you sing for me?  Please?” he asked.  Oh, no!  I’m going to sound horrible.

    “I really don’t think you want me to do that.”  I was positive he didn’t want me to do that.  I wasn’t warmed up, my ribs hurt, and I wasn’t particularly talented, either.  I searched for an excuse.  “I’m in pretty rough shape right now, what with that tumble down the stairs and all.”

    “Please.  I’d like to hear a new voice after so long of listening to those self-important inflated egos upstairs.  Besides, I’m a very good judge of voice, I might be able to tell you if you could benefit from training, or not.”

    I laughed a touch bitterly at that.  Where would I get training? 

    “Where am I supposed to get training?  I’m always moving, not to mention always broke!”  That usually didn’t bother me, but it did stop me from doing a few things I wanted to.  Erik’s eyes began to darken in disappointment and I gave in.  He always seemed sad, and if he thought a single song would brighten his day, I’d just do my best to oblige him.  “Well, I suppose I could make it through one short song, if it would please you.”

    “Very much.” He smiled, then sat upright and gestured imperiously at a chair.  “Please, begin.”  It was more of a command than a request.  Suddenly I was not quite so sure I was with a man instead of a ghost; his attitude had changed so much in that instant.

“I prefer to stand, thanks.”  I pondered quickly which of the many songs I knew would be appropriate and finally settled on the classic “Greensleeves.”  It fit my range quite well and was short enough that singing it oughtn't make me too much more exhausted.

I took a deep breath to begin and felt another painful twinge in my side.  Shifting my posture a bit so those hurt muscles weren’t quite so involved, I began to slowly feel my way through the technical parts of the song in the first verse to ensure I could sing it in my damaged state.

I chanced a glance at Erik and wished I hadn’t.  His face was fixed in an expression of polite interest below his mask but his eyes showed boundless disappointment.  I closed my own eyes so I would not see his eyes and that look anymore and launched into the song in full.

I began with a monosyllabic version of the first verse.  I usually started with this on the streets so people would know what I was about to sing.  The music soothed me a bit and I swayed gently in time to it, escaping a bit. 

My best had always been good enough for me, and it wasn’t my fault that the singers above had much more training and talent than I had.  Erik was the one who had asked me to sing and I HAD tried to tell him it was a poor idea.  I was just going to finish my song irregardless.

I began the words to the first verse and mentally aimed the first line right at Erik.  You do me wrong…  I was doing my best, but I never would have sung if I had known I would be judged so harshly.  Since I had already been judged I would just enjoy myself and let loose with a few extra vocal swoops and pushes I didn’t normally include.

I finished, holding out the last note just a bit longer than usual.  Then, clasping my hands in front of me, I opened my eyes and stared at the scuffed toes of my boots. “I told you it wouldn’t be any good,” I murmured to them.

“Actually, my dear, it was quite lovely.”  I looked up quickly, surprised.  His warmth was genuine.  My shock at his thoughts on my voice was nothing compared to the surprise I was about to get.  “Would you be willing to let me train you, while you’re here, at least?”

I managed to stammer out an affirmative reply.  No one had EVER offered me something I’d wanted so much before without asking anything in return. “I’d like that very much!  When can we start?”

“Tomorrow morning, I think.  You probably shouldn’t have even sung just now, but I’m a selfish man.  I apologize.”  I was so excited about the prospect of lessons that I was barely noticing my side. 

“It’s all right, I like to sing, and my side didn’t hurt that bad.”  I winked broadly at him; although now that I mentioned it, my side DID hurt a lot.  Damn those stairs!

    He rose from his seat on the organ bench.  “You should probably rest now, you’ve had a long and, ahem, painful day.  Why don’t you take a hot bath in your room and I’ll leave a tray with dinner on it outside your door?”  I didn’t even pay attention to what he was saying past the words ’hot bath.’  I hadn’t had a hot bath in months, and in my current battered condition it seemed like the best gift in the world.

    “Mmmm, a bath would be heavenly right now.”

    “Excellent.”  He stepped down off the organ pedestal then paused.  Leaning back, he caught up a small green bottle of the side of the organ and handed it to me, leading me out the door.  It rested cool and smooth in my palm.  “Gargle a bit of this when you wake up and then meet me in the music room.  It’ll clear out your throat and you’ll sing before breakfast so your pipes are pristine without the influence of food or caffeine.”   We went down the hall to my room and I didn’t notice he stopped at my door until he spoke.

    “Where are you going?”

    “To get my stuff.  I left it in the foyer, where you told me to.”

    “You won’t need it.  I’ll provide everything you could need.”  That came as a bit of s shock.  I was so self-sufficient that I hadn’t even considered the thought of someone else providing for my needs.  But if he said that I was provided for, I’d believe him.  I’d already figured out that Erik was not in the habit of lying, at least not as he saw it.  I was about to go back when I remembered a few items from my bag that I refused to live the week without.

    “I doubt you can supply everything I’d need.  There are a few things I need from my bag.”  I began to walk back to the foyer again.

    “Like what?”

    “Let me get it, and I’ll show you.”

“Here, I’ll get it,” he sighed and moved past me into the living room. “You see your room.”

I was more than happy with this arrangement, because I really was curious as to what my room was like.  Would it be as skillfully and lavishly decorated as the rest of his home, or dusty and unused as he never had guests?

I opened the door with a deep breath of anticipation and the vista within did not disappoint me.  The entire room had been done in shades of deep blue, my favorite color, and was lit throughout by white and blue candles.  The floor was covered in a deep soft carpet of midnight blue and the walls were divided into panels of a matching blue by strips of lighter blue molding and chair rails.  Even the ceiling was a deep blue, but speckled by stars to resemble the night sky.  The corner to my left contained a vanity and delicate chair.  It had an upright mirror and was covered in bottles and boxes of lotions, perfumes, brushes, combs and other dainties.  Erik’s guest room is supplied for a woman.  I wonder who lived here before me? 

To my right was a small sitting area with a love seat and a formal but comfortable looking armchair.  Both had wooden arms and legs but the seat cushions were upholstered in a lovely blue brocade.  In between was a small, round, marble topped table with a large silver vase on it.  It was filled to overflowing with fresh white roses.  I went over to examine it closer and found that it had an ornate capital ‘M’ engraved on its front and back. Something urged me not to disturb it.

I looked up to see the bed behind the sitting area.  It was a gigantic four poster bed complete with gauzy canopy and bed curtains.  I ran over to it, laughing with joy.  I suddenly felt like a princess in her castle.  I had always, secretly, wanted a bed just like this one.  The only thing that kept me from flinging myself down on it right that moment was the conscious thought that I was VERY dirty.  There was a small bedside table next to it, holding up several candles, but also the only electric lamp in the room.  I could definitely get used to the softness of candlelight for a week.

Turning from the bed, I went to examine the last piece of furniture in the room.  A giant armoire of darkly stained wood sat against the wall opposite the bed.  Cautiously opening its doors I was pleasantly surprised by what it contained.  Women’s clothing in many styles: skirts, dresses, slacks, blouses.  There were many different styles and colors, but all of them were elegant and made of soft, rich or flowing fabrics.  They looked like they might fit me, as well.

Opening the drawers, I was delighted to find the rest of the clothing I would need.  There were also several silk and cotton nightgowns, slippers and two robes, both full length.  One was silk and the other was a quilted cotton.  Both looked delightfully comfortable.

I had not yet explored the doorway opposite the one I’d entered.  Looking in it was dark, but I fumbled about and found a light switch.  When the light came on, I could not stifle a loud gasp.

It was a bathroom, my bathroom, and the hugest one I’d ever seen.  The walls, floors, counters, everything was a beautifully veined green marble, including the tub.  It was very deep and large enough to easily have held three people.  A counter surrounded it at the height of the tub covered with soaps, salts, oils, powders and scattered among these were candles in low pink glass holders.

On the counter under the large mirror were more potions, lotions and powders than I’d ever know what to do with in my life.  I ran a hand along the edge of the tub and sighed contentedly.  When I was in this tub, I wouldn’t be under the Paris streets; I’d be in heaven!

Erik’s knock on the outer door startled me out of my reverie and I called for him to enter.  Leaving the bathroom with a wistful sigh I found him still standing outside the open door.

“I said come in, didn’t you hear me?”  He stepped cautiously into the room and held out my pack to me.

“I wasn’t sure I had heard you correctly, and I did not wish to intrude.”  He looked around with a sad smile and walked over to the vanity where he picked up one of the perfume bottles and turned it idly over in his hands.  “After looking around are you still quite certain that you need things from your pack?  I had figured everything you could need would be here.  Is your room comfortable enough?”

“Is it comfortable?  Erik, I feel like I’m in a palace!  I would have been content sleeping on a soft sofa, but I have my own room and my own bathroom!?   I’m in heaven.”  I grinned at him over the top of my pack as I settled onto the love seat with it.  “Never mind a week; you may have trouble ever getting me to leave!”

I began to dig busily through my bag, setting things aside, while Erik replaced the perfume bottle and came to stand at the other end of the love seat.  “I just need a few things, not as much as I’d thought.”  I dug through to the near bottom of the bag displacing my tent and mess kit.  My fingers brushed something soft and fuzzy.  “Ah, there he is!”

Triumphantly, I pulled a small, battered teddy bear out of the pack and held him briefly aloft before hugging tightly him to my chest.  Erik raised his eyebrow. 

“A teddy bear?” he queried, raising an eyebrow.  “Aren’t you a bit old for toys?”  He wasn’t being unkind, but I could see that he couldn’t understand.

“Toddy.  I’ve had him since I was a very small child.  I’ve held him tight and cried myself to sleep on more nights than I can remember.  I’ve told him all my secrets.  He’s been everywhere with me.  I don’t go anywhere, not for more than a few days, without him.  It’s like…” I found I was having difficulty explaining so tried to begin again.  “He is my one link to myself in the past, my triumphs and tragedies.   MYSELF!  No matter how far I roam, how friendless and comfortless my life becomes I will always have this tiny piece of fluff for companionship and for hope.  Someone loved me very much, once as a child, and gave him to me.  Maybe I will be very lucky and someone will love me that much, again, someday.  Who knows?”

The words were foolish and carrying a teddy bear all over Europe was rather childish, but I didn’t care.  I got up, and with a kiss on the nose, laid Toddy in the middle of one of the pillows on my bed.

Finally, I looked at Erik.  He was watching me quietly with a strange, almost admiring look on his face.  Finally he said, “And what other wonders will you pull from your bag?”

“Just two,” I said quietly and settled down to dig through again.   The first was found quickly and I pulled out a ragged notebook, laying it in my lap.  A pen quickly followed it.  “My journal,” I said, briefly.

“Ah,” was his only response.

It took me some searching to find the last item I was looking for.  It ended up being jammed in a corner of the pack and wrapped in a thick cushy sweater to keep it proof from breaking.  I breathed a deep sigh of relief as I pulled the bottle full of thick red oil from the bag.

“What have you got there?”  I offered him the bottle for examination.

“It’s an ointment for sore muscles and bruises.  I am definitely going to want that tonight.”  Before I could warn him he took off the cap and sniffed deeply.  He coughed long and explosively, managing not to spill any of the oil in his fit, however.  After he had recovered he quickly recapped the bottle and placed it out of harms way on the floor.

“Cayenne?” he stammered, getting his voice back.

“It stimulates blood flow and warms the area.  Just takes a bit of getting used to!”

“I’ll accept your word on that.  Do you need anything else?”

I thought about it for a moment then shook my head.  “No, it think I’ll be quite all right.”

“Good.”  He picked up the pack and made for the door.  I followed him. 

In the hallway, he turned.  “I’ll put this someplace safe and out of the way.”  He turned down the hall as if to leave but hesitated and turned back. 

“Please, feel free to make yourself at home here,” he began quietly, almost shyly.  His gesture encompassed the entire house.  “You may go anywhere in my home you please.  If you need me, for some reason in the night, my room is at the end of the hallway.”   Then, he straightened and became what I would grow to know as, his usual assertive self again.  “I would recommend you get to that bath soon or you will be so sore in the morning you won’t be able to move, much less sing.”

“Yes, of course.  Thank you, Erik.” 

As I shut the door with a last smile at him, I noticed a peculiar thing.   There was a very large and solid dead bolt on the inside of the door.  I wonder what that’s there for?  With a shrug, I left it alone and went back to the armoire.  I selected the cotton robe and a nightgown and headed for my promised hot bath, whistling to myself.