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A secret now needs to be revealed. Most of the work on this site is done by Pope. He is the one with Ye Olde Photoshop, and with the thing lovingly called 'free time'. I can safely say that I, Fenris, have to beg for work on the comic. So, what do Frisco and I do? We add life-changing philosophies, and thought-provoking qoutes. Wisdom from Frisco:We ALSO provide comical insights for the episodes that would otherwise be lost forever. Despite Fenris' claim that he has no sense of humor, we do our best; and thats a LOT of work. Anyway, I will probably add onto my philosophies as I post em here. That little space on the side is just too small for my full blown rantings. So check in here even if you have read all of them and you might find a few nuggets of comedy gold Frisco's Philosophies: August 11, 2002 - Beef with Batman I was watching Batman Forever the other day...that movie scares me. I think it is the first batman movie where the guy's costume has nipples. Um...erm...not like I was looking or anything, but honestly they give his nipples a closeup. There were probably at least four scenes where they zoomed in on his suit. I swear, all you could see were a nipples and a six pack. Come to think of it, Batman�s suit is made of rubber, so it would�nt exactly conform to his body. For all we know, Batman could be a fat, beer chugging hobo. All he has to do is jump in his suit, and we would never know. Whatever happened to the good old days where his suit was made out of felt and the entire show had a budget of twenty dollars? August 18, 2002 - My Homicidal Driving Tendencies You know what really pisses me off? I�m cruising down the road and out of the corner of my eye I see someone staring at me. I risk a glance real quick, and yes, they are staring directly at me. A while later, I look back and they are still fixed at a point on the side of my head. At this point I want to push their car off the side of the road forcing them to careen into a large, stationary object, hopefully causing them to meet their fiery demise amid a flaming ball of twisted metal. But maybe thats just me. Also, the plague on my life that is the learner's permit adds to my rage. Thats that nifty little piece of plastic that is worthless unless you have an adult in the car. Lets just say that one half of the parental group in my family is insane. My dad is the driving nazi. Even if I do something right, he feels compelled to tell me three dozen ways it could have gone wrong. He also likes to tell me the mistakes of every single person who drives within a mile radius of me. Heaven forbid the radio should be on! I have been told that when I turn 21 I can have the radio on, thats something to look forward to! August 31, 2002 - Me and some English teachers are about to rumble School is almost here for us Virginia boys and you know what that means. Thats right boys and girls, last minute summer assignments. I have the great displeasure of reading The Adventures of Fuck-my-Ass-elberry Finn, an unholy creation from the earlier part of the 20th century. This book is one of the slowest I have ever read. Not only is the book huge, but the black dudes speak another language. Apparently it was cool in Twain�s time to write using the common dialect, but its a bitch for students a hundred years later. It ranks right up there with Great Expectations, a book about a kid who feels sorry for stealing some bread when he was a kid. I kid you not, that is one of the major plot points of this sorry piece of work. Pope is reading the Red Badge of Courage, which is partly his own fault because I gave him fair warning. I had to read that mother in 6th grade...NONE OF THE CHARACTERS HAVE NAMES! Each of the figures in this �masterpiece� is known by their height, age, or military rank. Who determines which books are classics anyway? I guess that book could teach me some great lesson about life...if I was growing up in 19th century England. Hmm...we did have to read that one book about a farmer named wang who smokes opium and buys a whore. That book was fairly good. I suppose it all goes back to my unrivaled hatred for english teachers. I hate them, they hate me...we have an understanding. The only english teacher I didn�t hate was never there because people in her family kept dying. Of course I hated the sub...but she had a wig come on! Perhaps they punish students out of some twisted hatred they have fostered for the spirit of the human race. I swear I can feel myself getting dumber with every word I read. Fenris' Quotes: August 9, 2002- "I'm crossing the line, talking to the other side of death, hearing the words that choke memories into flatlines." Thursday, Cross Out The Eyes August 16, 2002- "You move like I want to. To see like your eyes do. We are downstairs where no one can see new life break away. You make the water warm. You taste foriegn. And I know that you can see the cord break away." Deftones, Digital Bath August 25, 2002- "You don't have to be a racist to be a Nazi f*ck. Your mindless nationalism gives you credentials enough. You spew your right wing rhetoric when we get your attention. You've mistaken te Punk Scene for the Republican Convention." Anti-Flag, This Machine Kills Fascists |