| ...ally... I parked the car and ran into the hospital and upstairs. I got to the room door, and stood outside for a minute, trying to calm down. I walked in and saw Bryan standing by the incubator talking to the older nurse. I slowly walked over. "Hi," I said quietly, Bryan never answered, he looked up and I could tell by his red eyes that he had been crying. "Ok, what's going on?" "Well," the nurse started, Bryan couldn't talk, "she's developed a chest infection." She started. "And? What happens now?" I asked, hoping things weren't as bad as Bryan had said on the phone. "We're giving her antibiotics, to treat the infection, and we should see a result in the next 36 hours." "And if the antibiotics don't work within the 36 hours, what then?" I interupted her, I knew the score when it came to things like that, because of my previous job. "If they don't work," she sighed heavily, "if she deteriorates further, then, we may have to consider..." She didn't finish, I knew she was going to suggest possibly switching off the machines keeping her alive. "God." I whispered, and sat down beside Bryan, who had started to cry quietly. "But, I thought she was getting better." The nurse just sighed, and shook her head. She stood with us for a moment, then walked back to her desk. "Bryan?" I said, he never answered. "Is that what the doctor said this morning?" He nodded his head. " we can't give up now Bryan, we can't." "Ally," he looked at me, still teary, "is it fair on her? All she's done is fight, maybe she needs a rest, huh?" "I can't believe I'm hearing this! You actually want to do this?!" I was almost shouting and some of the other people in the room were watching us in silence. "You think I want this?! It's not about what we want anymore, it never was, it's about what's best, for everyone." He put his arm on my shoulder, but I shook it off, and stood up. "Ally?" I walked out of the room, and sat in the hall. I put my head in my hands, not knowing how long I was sitting there. Bryan came out and sat beside me, we just sat there in silence, not knowing what to say. After a while, his parents came to the hospital and I left him to sit with them in the hall, while I went back in. I sat there, just staring, things didn't look different, so how could they be so much worse. Sometime later, Bryan came back in as his parents had left. "How are they?" I asked him as he sat down. "Oh, they're really upset, especially mum, I think they're still in shock about this." He explained. "Derek's still in Dublin, so he's going to take Dylan for the next few days." "Oh ok, where's he staying?" "A hotel probably. Unless, do you think maybe he should stay at ours?" I looked at him shocked. After all, wasn't he mad at Derek in the slightest? Guess not. "Yeah, I'll call him on his mobile." Bryan nodded and I walked out to call him. I called him and arranged for him to come to the hospital and get keys, and let us see Dylan too, because we wouldn't be leaving the hospital at all over the next few days. Bryan called Ronan to let him know what had happened. We decided not to call the oters, because they were due back the next day. We went back into the room, a nd slept in the chairs, being woken up the next morning by the nurse telling us there were people outside to see us. We both walked out to he hall to see the rest of the band and the girls too. They didn't know what to say, just hugged us both. They were all sad, but Shane couldn't help but smile when he saw the younger nurse. I think he liked her. We sat for a while, talking mostly about the tour as no one wanted to mention how sick Jessica was. After an hour the nurse called us back in, while the others stayed outside. The 36 hours had passed with no improvement whatsoever. We knew what was going to happen. We had discussed it with the doctor and nurses the day before, what would happen if there was no change. We had to switch off. "Ally?" Bryan said quietly. "I can't." "Ally." He said, almost begging, "we've got to do this. I can't do this alone. Please." "I can't Bryan, you'll have to, I can't." I walked out. Bryan shouting after me. "Umm, could someone go in with Bryan?" I asked the group outside. "God no." They whispered. "I'll go in." Shane said quietly and hugged me, and walked into Bryan who was now sobbing openly. I walked outside to the garden. It was raining, but I didn't care, as long I was away from that room. I didn't realise someone had followed me out. I sat on one of the seats outside, and just thought about everything. Why did this happen? Why were we giving up? I couldn't answer any of the questions. "Ally?" Michelle had follwed me. I didn't answer her. She sat down beside me. After a few minutes, Mark came running out into the garden. Michelle got up and ran over and hugged him, afer a few minutes talking, they both walked back over to me. "Bryan needs you back in Ally." Mark said. "I can't Mark, I can't go back in there, don't make me, please!" I said quickly. "It'll be ok," Michelle said, "come on." I reluctantly stood up and walked back inside with them. We stopped outside the room. I slowly walked inside and saw Bryan, Shane, the nurse, and the doctor all crowded round the incubator. I looked at Bryan, was he smiling? "Ally!" He said excitedly. "What Bryan?" I answered coldly. "Look!" I looked over, they were removing the machine for breathing. "She - she, when they switched off, she started breathing, alone!" "What?!" I cried. He nodded and gave me a big hug. "So, now what? Is she going to be ok?" I asked, still in shock. "Yeah, a few more weeks in here, and if all goes well, she'll be able to come home." "Oh my god!" I gave him another hug, and we went outside to tell the others. So, that was it. A few more weeks, well months really, and she was well enough to come home, to a very big party. |