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brand x the message came from out of the blue: Brand X welcomes you into its clutches.
1999 april 20
better than cindy
i'm in a much better mood, just in case you were wondering.
at least part of the reason i was in such a foul mood yesterday morning was catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror first thing after i woke up and discovering not one but two giant blemishes, one on my chin and one just up and right of my upper lip.
i stared at my reflection but what i was really envisioning was a sixty year old me, sitting in one of those molded plastic chairs, my hair all frizzy grey and my face covered in zits, dressed in a frumpy polyester housecoat, neon floral of course, while below me a caption appeared:
claire, unable to overcome a teenage skin disorder
not even a burgeoning good hair day could alleviate my angst. nor could the comment from one of my coworkers, "hey! looks just like cindy crawford's beauty mark!" great, the only time in my life i will be compared to a supermodel is when i have an enormous zit on my face. i don't really think cindy crawford is all that attractive, though, so it's not as bad as it could have been. if, say, i had been compared in my blemished state to nastassja kinski, i might have had to find ways to keep the skin eruptions flowing.
then there is the pain in my stomach. it's been bothering me on and off for about a week and is always worse at the office, leading me to believe it is stress and nothing truly physiological, like an ulcer. i have been describing it as the little alien living in my tummy but what it mostly feels like is a tightly coiled spring, ready to explode at any minute. "maybe it's a tapeworm," offered gene helpfully, "they kinda curl up in your guts, don't they?"
and it was raining, and i was suffering from menstrual cramps, though still not as badly as in the past and for that i should be grateful, and mostly i just wanted to curl up in the warm bed and have more weekend. but instead i went to work and it was work, as usual, and i bitched and moaned about a variety of things, as usual, and then i left. the minute i walked out of the building it started to pour so i got soaking wet on the walk to the car and i was almost run over by a trio of whitehaired old women in a gigantic turquoise car.
but i wasn't and i decided as long as i was alive, albeit wet, i might as well be in a good mood. and i am.
tra la la, claire
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