The Sinister World
of Advertising
In advertising, anything
is considered fair game. Take this ad for example. At first glance, one
notices it is plagued with sexual innuendo. "LAID BY THE BEST"
.. They're talking carpets, of course. Or are they?
The
experts here at http://www.geocities.com/cja19/ad/index.html
were fascinated by this play on words and wondered if there was anything
more to it. "Laid" by the best.
"Could it have been an accident?"
the fascinated experts wondered. Okay, the horny experts wondered.
Anyway, "Could it have been an accident?" I wondered.
And so the studying and the testing and the disection of the advertisement
began.*
The first test the advertisement underwent
was a vigorous one. I exposed it to acid. As the acid corroded the
print, I could see no secret messages appearing. I applied a prepared
solution to neutralize the acid, and then re-examined the advertisement.
I checked the telephone number, finding all possible word cominbations
formed from the letter to number correlations as seen on a dial pad. Still,
nothing. I translated the wording to Greek (the woman looked Greek)
and then read the letters backward. And then, to my astonishment,
there was still nothing.
And then I did it.
I turned the advertisement... upside-down.
What I saw was shocking. What
I saw was amazing. What I saw was offensive. So, slowly
scroll down now, and take a look at the advertisement. See if you
can see what I saw.
Okay, this is the exact same advertisement,
with one important change.
It is upside-down.
Scroll down slowly now. Keep scrolling
slowly until I say.
There is no way this was an accident. No
way at all. Maybe if it hadn't been for that "laid" thing,
I would think it was just a coincidence, but no. So what were
they thinking? Why did they do it? Just to be funny?
Or did they do it to sell more carpets? To plant subconscious
seeds in your head, seeds that hatch into an irrestible urge to have some
carpet laid? Do readers of this advertisement find themselves
thinking about carpets when they see something arousing? Now.
Don't scroll. Look.
Yes. That is what you think it
is. Yes. See what they're doing now?? Do
you see? I have been thinking about what can be done about this
outrage. I've been thinking about it every night as I lay down in
bed. What should we do? I dream about it, you know. It
worries me. But after days of pondering, no, months, no.. years.
No, minutes. After minutes of thinking about it, I finally
came up with a solution.
I'd tell you, but I kind of like the thought
of your mind being a slave to the corporate capitalist society we champion
as the greatest out there, when that same society is championing us as
mere pawns to use at their disposal, mere pawns that will ask for carpet
to be laid at their will.
* No actual studying, testing, or disection was
performed, unless you count taking something from someone else's website
and putting it on yours as a test.