Surrendering
Chapter
9: Drunk Ducks
(Un)
Important babbling-notes from Cimmy: I’m feeling all crazy today, I just bought a
copy of the two latest Screech Owls books, so I’ve been reading all weekend.
That’s why this following chapter might come out as a bit... spaced out. Just a
little warning.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
January
23rd
It had been
a VERY bad idea to tag along to that club in town.
I felt like
I was misplaced, lost somewhere I’d never been. I knew I was exaggerating, but
I was so used to do that, that I really didn’t care.
“What’s up
with you tonight?” Adam asked me. He was hanging around me, randomly talking to
me sometimes. Why he was almost glued to me was more then I could understand.
He’d been following me since we’d arrived to the nightclub, and he was still
not leaving my side. Maybe it was because of our little study-session
yesterday. I’d been nauseated all night after eating all that candy. It’d been
worth it though, I knew Adam a lot better then I knew anyone else on the team.
“You don’t
have to follow me if you do not want to,” I said slowly, saying every word very
pointedly. “You could just as well follow that blonde girl around, until she
slaps you in the face.”
Adam
laughed and looked at the girl I was talking about. Then he shrugged, grabbed
my arm and dragged me in the direction of the rest of our teammates.
“There you
are,” Connie yelled over the music. She let go of the lip-lock she’d been
having with Guy and went to meet me.
“Hey,
watcha doin’?” I laughed, when I heard Connie’s slurring voice.
“Nothin’,” I
imitated Connie’s talk. “Watcha been drinkin’, Con?”
“Oh, a lot.
Maybe too much, I think. Wanna dance with me?” Connie didn’t wait for an
answer, took my hand and went up to the dance floor.
I can’t
dance at all. My Dad wanted me to take lessons, but I refused. That’s for
girls. I’m not very aesthetical at all. I can’t sing, dance, paint, write or
anything. The only thing I can do is to play hockey, and I suck at that. That’s
the only thing I’m interested in, for that matter.
“Admit it,
you’re having fun,” Charlie said. He was sitting next to me at one of the
tables, and we were having a conversation. Sort of. The loud music was drowning
most of it. Connie had let me sneak away after a while on the dance floor. I
guess she wanted to continue making out with Guy.
“I never
said I wouldn’t,” I answered, sipping at my coke. “I just said that...”
“Never
mind, Cee. You can bitch about it how much you want, the truth is, you’re
having fun. Fuuun.”
I turned my
head towards the others. I was tired of Charlie interrupting me all the time. I
looked around for Fred, but he was nowhere to be seen. He was probably
somewhere getting drunk. Again. He was unbelievable, I don’t understand how he
can drink that much and still have his brain intact.
Connie went
by, singing on something, with her boyfriend’s hand in a firm grip.
I sighed,
still looking for Fred. I was having a good time, I could admit that, but I
still didn’t feel like I belonged. Adam was gone, and I kind of missed having
him as a shadow, I was just feeling alone now.
Charlie
smiled at me, at the same time as he downed another drink. “You could try to
look a little more happy, you know. Have you never been to a party before, or
what?”
“This is
not a party, Charlie. This is a night club, it’s not the same thing.”
Charlie
shrugged, waved at Adam who just passed by, and continued to disturb me with
his thoughts.
“It’s like
this, Cee... I really like you, but sometimes you have to loosen up a little.
Don’t be such a good girl all the time. I haven’t exactly known you for that
long amount of time, but this much I know; you have to loosen up. Your parents
aren’t here, please, for God’s sake, just loosen up already!” Charlie put his
hands on my shoulders and shook me around. I slapped his hands away and stared
at him.
“Stop it,
Charlie. Maybe I just don’t want to. Are you gonna force me into doing
something I don’t want to, just so you can be content?”
Charlie
looked a little regretful. “Sorry, but I just want you to enjoy yourself.”
I sighed,
yawned and stretched out in the seat. I could totally go for a little
‘enjoyment’ right now, but to loosen up? Never.
“Please, I
just want you to have fun,” Charlie continued.
“Yeah, I
heard you the first time.” I looked at the lights by the dance floor. Once, I
could have been enjoying myself up there, but these days? I learned from my
mistakes. But I admitted to myself that I’ve had a great time with Connie, just
a while ago...
“I guess
you’re right,” I said, giving up another sigh. “I’m gonna do something dumbass
stupid.”
“Good for
you!”
“And I’m
gonna behave just like you.”
Charlie was
about to open his mouth and congratulate me again, when he realized I’d been
sarcastic.
“You really
should,” he muttered. “Loosen up, get drunk, get laid, whatever.”
I made a
face, and sat up straight again. The last time I did that, I’d been in some
serious trouble. Remembering all those things again just made me even more
depressed.
“Cee? Hey,
Cecilia? Are you okay?” Charlie asked me after a while. “You’re not sad, are
you? I’m sorry if I said something wrong.”
I looked at
him and smiled a little. I’d been caught up in my thoughts, just realizing that
things really couldn’t get any worse.
“I’m okay,”
I said, grabbing his bottle of beer and taking a big sip. Charlie stared at me,
with a surprised look on his face.
“What’s
going on with you now? Have you lost your mind?” he asked, taking his bottle
back from me. “I thought you didn’t drink. That’s what Fred told me.”
I shook my head.
It was time to stop worrying about everything. This might not be such a good
way to take up my old manners, but I had to start somewhere. At least I wasn’t
about to take any drugs this time... Besides, I needed to get drunk. I’ve been
sober for six months. I couldn’t take it anymore. Okay, so I’d been drunk once
during the Junior Goodwill Games, but Fred’s the only one who know about that
embarrassing moment.
Charlie
still had that puzzled face on, when I decided to leave him bitching to
himself, while I was away ordering more drinks.
Guy and
Connie met up with us again some times later. Connie sat down next to me,
pointing to the door.
“I know
where Fred is,” she said cheerfully. “Are you guys drinking tequila?”
I smiled.
Even if Charlie was the most big-mouthed person when he was drunk, he couldn’t
brag about his ability to drink. I’d been taken a lot of tequila shoots by now,
and I’d noticed that Charlie was an easy one to drink under the table.
I know that
I can drink a lot of alcohol without being too affected by it. However, I
really wish I’d never found out about that in the first place. I really don’t
need to know how much alcohol I can consume before I pass out. And the fact
that I’d been drinking so much that large amounts of alcohol don’t affect me
instantly anymore? That’s another fact I can live without. That doesn’t mean
that I can’t get drunk. At that point, I was already drunk.
“Yes, we
are,” I answered happily, trying hard not to make my thoughts affect my mood.
“Wanna drink with us? Or me, Charlie’s out.”
“Am not,”
Charlie objected, looking a little sick. Too much tequila shoots wasn’t good
for anyone.
Guy
shrugged, sat down next to Charlie and racked up another set of glass. “I’m
in.”
Connie
shook her head. “You’re not, Guy. You can’t drink tequila, you’ll get drunk.”
“I am
drunk,” Guy said, smiling at Connie. “It wouldn’t hurt to drink a couple of
these.”
Connie
seemed a little irritated when Guy didn’t do what she said. “Guy, c’mon, I
don’t want you to drink anymore,” she said, pulling his arm.
“Stop it,
Connie, I know what I’m doing.”
I was about
to object too, but Fred, who came tumbling up to the table, interrupted us all.
“There you
are,” he said to me. “Please, can’t you... Are you guys drinking tequila?”
Fred pushed
himself into the same seat as Connie and I, grabbed the bottle, now only
half-filled with tequila, looked at me and laughed.
“Charlie,
jeez, you got her to drink? How the hell did you do that?”
Charlie
looked at him and shrugged. “I didn’t do shit, Fred. She just decided that we
should take some tequila shoots, and stupid as I am, I agreed.”
“And now
he’s drunk and feels bad,” I smiled. “Wanna be in too?”
Fred looked
a little surprised, but agreed anyway.
God,
tomorrow’s not going to be a fun day to wake up in. But as my old motto points
out, ‘it won’t hurt as bad if you’re drunk’.
Combine
that with my depressed mood and you’ll have a drunk Cecilia.
Sometimes I
crack myself up.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
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