A Chaotic Wedding
Chapter
5: Stuck in the Middle with You
(Un) Important babbling-notes from Cimmy: Sorry for confusing people by throwing in that ‘extra’ Jen. Jennie is NOT the girlfriend, the girlfriend Jen is NOT the waitress! I just had cheer up a friend (by food-poisoning her).
Jennie, if
you’re reading this, which you’re probably not, I dedicate this chapter to you
and your great-grandmother. May she rest in peace and party in heaven, right?
“Det
är något bortom bergen, bortom blommorna och sången,
det
är något bakom stjärnor, bakom heta hjärtat mitt.
Hören
- något går och viskar, går och lockar mig och beder:
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11.55 – still
in the basement
“Hello!
Anybody there? Let us OUT!” I scream while banging on the door. The other two
have given up on ever getting out, but I’m still trying to get some attention
from the caterers. Where are they?!
“Shut up!” Goldberg yells at me.
“Yeah, shut up! You’re just loud now!” Luis mutters.
I sit down on the floor and keep kicking the door, until Luis throws a bag of chips in my head. “Shut up!”
We’ve been dow here for over an hour. We’re supposed to be at the church in less then three hours, and we’re stuck! I’am stuck, at least. What Goldberg and Luis consider themselves to be, I don’t know.
“So, why are we here again?” Goldberg says pointedly. I shrug. None of your business, dumbass.
“You were the one dropping that breakable bowl!” I reply, knowing I was getting on his nerves. “You never would’ve been here in the first place if you hadn’t...”
“Oh, pipe down, Jess,” Luis interrupts me. “You were the one attacking the bandmembers! We heard your threats!”
“So what? They were being rude! And that tubby one was a bit of a racist too, I think. He even made a move on Sarah!” I whine like a wounded pig. Not like that’s supposed to be a huge catastrophy, but I need to whine right now. You would too if you were trapped in the basement with garlic, chips, Goldberg and Luis.
“Well, what’s that have anything to do with this situation? Sarah isn’t even here!” Luis yells and get up. “She’s not your possesion, is she?”
“Of course not,” I bitch back. “I was just saying...” What was I saying? Drunk bandmembers is terrorizing a fellow player (fine; ex-girlfriend) and I don’t consider that as a bad thing? Of course I do! But Sarah is still that annoying girl who forced me to dissect a frog in bio-class our sophomore year... So what if I passed out?
“Jess? Hello? Jesse? Earth to Jesse, this is ground-control Goldberg. What are you thinking about?” Goldberg waves his hand in front of my eyes. Uhm, nothing. I was NOT thinking about why Sarah is pissed at me. No, not at all.
“Food?” I ask. Goldberg just shakes his head at my comment.
“He’s got it bad,” Luis sighs and goes over to the door. “HELP!”
We’re all about to strangle each other when suddenly I hear a buzzing sound. First I think it’s because Goldberg just sat down on a bag of chips. It’s not. I hear the wind howl. It sounds like a heavy storm. What’s going on? Last time I checked, it was a thaw outside! How long have we been in here!?
I panic for a second. Then the lights go out. Déjà vous? You betcha.
“HELP!” Goldberg shouts.
Shut up!
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12.01 – in
the kitchen
Yippie. I have to clean the kitchen in order to get the food done until the wedding. Stupid Charlie.
While I’m cleaning, I hear pounding from below. Darn those rats. Who taught them how to bang like that?
The noise continues for a while. Then it stops. Great, they died.
Suddenly I see something fall down outside the window, and all the lights start to shimmer. What the hell? I don’t need a blackout, I need a miracle! The blackout during New Year was enough for me. This time I’m all alone. I’m going to panic if the lights...
Okay, now it’s black. Not good. “Hello?” I whisper. “Anyone? Charlie? Hello?” I walk up to the window and look out. In less then an hour, the snow have covered the whole landscape. I can’t see more then snow. But I do see that the snow have caused a branch to fall over the electric-wire. That’s what brought on the darkness.
“Cecilia?”
I quickly turn around. The rats know my name! Oh, God! I tip-toed over to the vent and put my ear against the bars. The sound stopped. Maybe it’s a talking horse? Or a coach-roach? Like in that movie with that guy from Stand By Me? Those coach-roaches spoke.
“CECILIA!?”
I stumble backwards, trip over the bucket of water I was mopping the floor with and feel the blood in my vains stop pumping. “Charlie!” I bellow. “Charlie!”
Charlie doesn’t come to my rescue. Instead the rat/coach-roach/horse introduces itself. “Cecilia? It’s us! Could you let us out?”
I’m dreaming. That’s what this is. It’s all a dream. Connie and Guy aren’t getting married, Fred never broke up with me, we never graduated from high-school and... It’s all a dream.
“It’s dark, let us out! Help!”
I almost start to cry. “Who’s there?” I demand to know before I let the bugs out.
“It’s me! Jesse! Open the door!”
The rat’s name is Jesse?
“Open the Goddamn door already!” Goldberg howls. I can hear it’s him.
I hurry over to the basement door. “How do I know it’s you?” I say while turning the knob. It won’t open.
“Because it just is!” Jesse answers and keeps pounding on the door. “Open!”
“I am trying, stop with the yelling!” I keep yanking the knob, but nothing. So I look for the keys. They’re on a shelf above the sink. I’m too short to get them without climbing. So I climb.
“What’s taking so long?” Jesse wants to know.
“You try and climb a sink in the dark,” I mutter. Suddenly I hear a new sound. Jesse is being rational and tries to knock down the door. Good freaking luck you idi... “Shit!”
Jesse succeeds with opening the door, at the same time as the lights come back. You got to love those generators... I lose my balance and fall. Stupid sink.
“Nice stunt,” Jesse tells me when I finally get up from the floor. “Did you break anything?”
“I hope you get eaten by a giraff,” I say and hurry out to the ballroom. Ouch, that hurt. Oh, goody, now I just have to find someone to make the food!
My clothes are soaking wet from that stupid bucket of water I spilled all over the floor. I’m so glad I wore my best jeans today.
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I have no idea what to write. The most expensive gift is from me...
Damn, Derek already said that. Idiot. Oh, crap. I just spilled Coke all over
this page! It’s ruined! Sorry about that, I’ll just turn over the page... This
page is sort of ruined, though. You shouldn’t hand out beverages to people who
are about to sign the guestbook. Just a tip. Oh, look, the text gets all
blurry! I better stop.
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Author’s
Note: Mary, I know you weren’t all crazy about the
idea of Jesse and Sarah... But I already have a story for them in... Must
think... Love, Anonymous I think it was... But you’re right about her and Trav.
Anyway, it’s not what you think with them! God no! Now I’m done.
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