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Courtesy of http://www.pantheonwrestling.com July 9th, 2008
3:24 p.m. Sometimes in life you have to do things out of your own protection no matter how much it hurts your heart. You have do things sometimes that you know may fuck up your relationships forever. Yet you know you still have to do it. I mean I think that is what you have to do. I really don't know what to think. I mean last week Riley put a thought in my head that has lingered for almost a week now. It has now gotten stronger with each passing day. What if Riley is right and Autumn is not my daughter? That would make sense that Ashley tell her parent that I was the father. What if Ashley was just putting this on charade so that she could get some more money from me? Really though hasn't the bitch milked me of my money long enough? I mean is it that she doesn't know who the father is and I was the one making the most money? Then again what if Riley was wrong? What if it turns out that Ashley was telling the truth and she gets pissed off when I ask for a paternity test? What happens if she takes my privileges away of seeing my daughter? I don't think I could be able to endure that now. I mean it was different when I didn't know she even existed. So here I am faced with yet another decision to make. Do I pick up the phone and call to ask her for a paternity test or do I trust a woman that hasn't completely been honest with the last couple of weeks? I mean sure when I put it out like that it seem simple ,but you don't take in to the fact that my heart still is willing to believe her completely and blindly. Damn I wished I could be a cold heartless bastard like my father was then maybe I wouldn't be so damn torn all the damn time. -=The Meeting and a Chance Encounter=- These questions raced through my head as I stared at my slider phone. My finger rested on the send button as my screen on the phone had Ashley's name highlighted. I was tempted to press it as I just couldn't do it for some reason. It was like something had a hold of me that prevented me from dialing her. I then gingerly stood up as I was still sore and bandaged up from Steve Jason's attack on my at Disclosure as I walked over to the mirror and looked myself in the face. I saw something besides just the bandage covering half my forehead from the stitches. I saw something in my eyes that I have never seen before.....fear. Yes for the first time in my life I was scared. Not even the thought of going to jail struck fear in me as this did. I was scared that my daughter would be taken away from me forever. My heart could take anything else except that. "Gio, this has to be done" I muttered to myself as I tried to talk myself into it. I knew that I had to find out for sure. I mean really could I take the word of a woman that has withheld the existence of my own daughter from me. I had to make the call and talk to her. I looked at the phone as my thumb scroll back down to Ashley as I started to press send. Yet again I froze up. I then took a deep breath and pressed the send button as I heard the rings. On the second ring I heard a voice. "Hello Gio." I guess she could tell by the caller id on her phone. I didn't know if I was suppose to apologize for last week or not. I decide to not as I was completely in the right in the way I acted toward her. "Hello." I paused as I tried to find the courage to ask her. I tried to get up in fortitude to tell her that I didn't believe that Autumn was my daughter. Yet every time I tried to tell her my mouth remained shut. "Did you need something?" Her voice was stern and very cold toward me. She sounded like she was still pissed off at my little outburst at the fourth of July barbeque. I guess she had a right ,but I did too. Though I knew I had to do this as I cleared my throat as again I couldn't get it out. "I-I-I..." What the fuck was going on with me? Why couldn't I get this out in the open? Though a thought triggered in my head, did I want to ask her on the phone or in person? Maybe doing it in person would be better as maybe I could get it out and it would be better. Yet maybe I needed to do it in a public place where she couldn't flip out and bitch toward me. " I need to talk to you, Ashley. Can you meet me somewhere." I said that as I begin to try and think of a place that she and I could meet at. I continued to think as she interrupted my though process with her answer. "Why can't you just ask me over the phone." Cause I can't spit the damn thing out that is why. I mean that is answer that I wanted to give her ,but I figure the more civilized path would be better to go down as she was already seemingly pissed at me still. I didn't want to get in any deeper water. "Cause I think it would be better if I did it in person." I heard her take a deep sigh as if meeting me face to face was going be torture for her. I mean what the fuck, she was the one that wanted us to be friends. Anyway I then thought of a little local bar about the same distance for both of us as she began to speak again. "Fine Gio, where do you want to meet?" She made it sound like I was scheduling her execution or something by the tone in her voice. She is the one that wanted this whole situation to work out. "Meet me at Las Brisas around eight o'clock." That should be plenty of time for her to find a babysitter for Autumn. I mean the kid couldn't go to a bar. "Fine, I see you then." With that she didn't even get me a chance to say anything else as she hung up the phone. I slowly took the phone away from my ear as I closed it. I then turned back fell on my bed as I tried to get some rest before I had to leave and meet Ashley at the bar. I need the rest as my body was sore from the match and Steve Jason's attack afterwards. I laid there as I closed my eyes for a bit.
July 9th, 2008 7:14 p.m. I finished putting on my dress shirt in front the mirror. I finished buttoning the last button as I checked the clock on the night stand. The clock read fifteen after seven. I knew I had to leave so I could get there a little early. I figured that I would need a couple drinks before the meeting I thought if I was a bit buzzed the conversation would flow a little better. I mean I wasn't able to tell her when I was cold sober, maybe I could conjure up the courage to tell her with a little help from some scotch. Yeah that was the ticket. I looked at the time again and if I left now it would give me about thirty minutes to get my courage up. So with that I hurriedly grabbed my keys from the dresser and made my way down the stairs and out the door as I headed to the bar.
July 9th, 2008 7:29 p.m. I arrived at the bar in about fifteen minutes. The bar wasn't a place where you could throw a party with three thousand people. Rather this was a quiet bar where you could stop in for a quick drink after work. The bar was themed as sort of an old Mexican cantina. The bar was semi full as I approached the bar counter and took a seat on the stool close to where the bar bent and headed toward the wall. My stomach was in knots from what I was going to have to ask my ex-wife as the bartender approached me. "What will it be?" He asked me as he cleaned out a shot glass. I figured scotch on the rocks would settle my nerves as I had been quite the scotch drinker as far back as I could remember. I mean it was one of the more of the dignified alcohol you could drink. After all it was the drink my father had stored in his bottom desk drawer. I remember I use to sneak in for a drink when I was underage. "Scotch on the rocks" I said as I looked around the bar. The people in the bar seemed more of the higher middle class of people sprinkled in with some more privilaged ones. This wasn't some hole in the wall bar that I had been use to the last year while I stayed in that piece of shit place after I got out of jail. The bartender fixed my drink as he placed down a napkin and then my scotch on the rocks. I picked up and sipped on it as it was very smooth. I placed it down as a beautiful woman came up next to me. I looked at her as she look familiar to me ,but I couldn't put my finger on it. I sat there I listened to her conversation with the bartender. "Appletini please." I looked forward ,but some force kept making me glance over at the woman. She had dirty blonde hair shoulder length with a petite frame. She had a shirt that just stopped above her waist line that caused her stomach to play peek-a-boo. She had some jeans on. I continued to glance over as the bartender placed the drink in front of her. She then search in her purse to pay for it. "Fuck." She said underneath her breath yet I was close enough to hear her. She kept digging as it look like she had forgot her wallet or something. I decided to help her out as I motioned to for the bartender. "Put her drink on my tab." When I said that she looked up at me and gave a smile as she stopped digging in her purse which by the size of it showed that she couldn't carry much in it. She then grabbed her drink as she continued to look at me. "Thank you very much. You want some company?" Her offer was kind as it would probably make the wait go quicker with some one to talk to. So I nodded my head yes as she took a seat in the stool beside me as I took another sip of my scotch. She then took a sip of her Appletini as well. "I'm Tara." She broke the ice with an introduction. She put out her hand for an hand shake. I reached out and shook her hand as she cracked a smile a bit. I couldn't help to smile back at her. She seemed to very personal. She didn't seem like one of those crazy women that would track you down just by your name as I respond to her with my name. "I'm Giovianni, but you can call me Gio ." I said as my smile got even bigger as she then took a sip of her Appletini as the bar began to get a little more crowded. She scooted her stool over a little closer to me as I could now smell her sweet perfume as she continue to have some small talk with me while we continued with our drinks. "So Gio, what brings you out here tonight?" I didn't know what it was about her that I felt that I could tell her my personal problems. Maybe it was her soft eyes. Whatever it was she had, I spelt my guts to her about all the problems with my ex-wife. I couldn't believe what I was doing as I hadn't even known this woman for three minutes. Yet just by the exchanging of introductions, I felt some sort of connection with her. I felt that I could tell her anything and she would understand. "Well I am meeting my ex-wife here around eight. See she had a kid two years ago while I was in jail that I had no idea about. Now two weeks ago she tells me that I have a kid. Though to make things worse my friend put it in the head that kid isn't even mine. That is why I am meeting her. I am going to ask for a paternity test. I don't know how she is going to react." She looks at me with concern as she put her hand on my leg. This wasn't in a sexual way as it was more of a comforting placement of the hand as she understood my dilemma. "Sounds kind of like a Maury show. Though please don't take my joke the wrong way, I understand that sometimes in life you have to do things to people that you don't want too even though you love them." Love? Was she talking about my situation or her own as I couldn't help but notice while she was talking, she kept looking around the room. The look though wasn't that she was looking for someone rather hoping they wouldn't find her. "Are you okay Tara?" I mean I was honest with her about my problem, maybe she would tell me what was wrong with her. She look at me and gave me an fake smile this time. I could tell it was a fake smile by the way she forced herself to smile. "It's a long story about some people that are looking for me. Anyway your ex-wife should be getting here any time now." I checked my watch as it was about five minutes till eight as Tara was right, Ashley was about to be here. Yet for some reason I didn't want Tara to go. I couldn't believe that I was going to do this ,but what the heck. She was beautiful and she gave me a sense of comfort that not many woman have given me. "That is true Tara. Tell you what about you tell me that long story over dinner this week?" I smiled hoping she would say yes. She then opened her small purse and dug through it a bit. She then returned with a pen. She gave me another smile as I sipped on my scotch. "That sounds good. Call me later and given a time and place." She grabbed a napkin as she wrote down her number. She then folded it up as she put it in my coat pocket. She finished up her Appletini as she stood up. "Talk to you later, Gio." She walked away as I couldn't take my eyes off of her. She exited the bar as she still look around the bar cautiously. Though while I couldn't take my eyes off her, I didn't notice that Ashley had already entered the bar. She walked over and sat down as she snapped her fingers thus snapping out of my trance. I look back at Ashley. "Who the fuck was that? Was that why you called me here? To she me your new little whore." Whoa, whoa. What the fuck was this? Was she jealous that I was paying attention to another woman. Was she angry that I didn't fall all over myself when she entered the bar? Anyway why did she care? She was the one that wanted the damn divorce. She was the one that had made my last couple weeks complete hell. "That was Tara. Why do you care anyway? Remember you said you wanted to be friends. Oh and that is not the reason I called you here." That felt good. I mean maybe there was something to that Tara after all. My heart wasn't controlling my conversation with Ashley. I could actually make an intelligent argument. It took Ashley back a bit. "Oh okay, fine. Anyway what is the reason you called me here." This was the hard part now. I mean how the fuck do I tell here that I don't Autumn is my kid. She waited as she was still kind angry at the sight of me talking to another woman. I finished up my scotch as I began to explain. "See Riley and I were talking and well he put a thought in my head." She began to tap on the counter as she then interrupted me before I could even finish my explanation. "Why are you going to listen to a drunk anyway?" Umm why was she so damn antsy? She just called Riley a drunk before I even told her what he said? "He may be, but he did make a good point. Why is it that Autumn doesn't have any of my features? She began to backpedal at that. She looked flabbergasted at me. "What!? She has your eyes and your nose." I knew she was lying. I mean the girl didn't have a single feature that proved she was my daughter. Ashley then stopped as she knew I wasn't buying it. She then flipped the blame on me. "Wait are you saying that she isn't your kid? You are trying to get out of raising your own daughter aren't you? I should have known that you would be just like your father." Damn that bitch. She always know how to push my buttons and hit me where it hurts. She had flipped the whole situation around on me. "No, no, no. I am not trying to get out raising my kid. It's just--" Before I could get the rest out, she interrupted me again. "It's just that you don't believe me." Well yeah actually that is what the fuck I was going to say as Ashley just kept getting angrier and angrier. "Do you blame me, Ashley? I mean you kept the birth of my kid from me for two years and you haven't even told your parents that I am her father." I made a good point. She hadn't given me any reason to believe her. As it seemed Ashley knew she didn't have a leg to stand on. "Fuck you. What do want then to prove Autumn is your child." She began to tap the counter harder as I tried to tell her what I wanted as fear began to creep back. The scotch was losing the battle over fear. I knew I had to say before fear took over my body. The fear of not knowing if Autumn really is my daughter. The fear of actually losing my daughter. "A paternity test." She look taken back at the three words. She then slapped me across the face as she took the water that the bartender had given her and threw it in my face. "Fine you sorry son of a bitch. You can have the damn paternity test." She then stormed out of the bar as she left me cleaning my face off with some napkins as I turned back around and tapped my glass for another scotch. I couldn't believe I had just done that as I hope to God that Riley was a drunk that got in my head. I hoped that Autumn was my daughter. Yet now what would be my relationship with her now that Ashley was pissed off at me. Would she let me see my daughter? I didn't know, all I could do it wait. Now though I had to focus on my match at the pay per view. It was time to get down to business. |
