Funny Non- 106ers
not 106 residents, but funny nonetheless...
everytime you want to do something...think of me wearing nothing but kneepads!  --bree--

steph:  see what kinda tricks you can do with that baton
greg:  yea, i'm gonna hop on that...the baton, not the girl


didn't your mother ever teach you 'you never sleep with someone that you care about'? sex is for making babies and revenge --fireman's profile (original source unknown)--

yeah, well procrastination is just like masturbation, your just fucking yourself --morgan--

do you know how much this cost me?  imagine throwing hundreds of dollars in the air.  hundreds of hundreds.  --joe--

it was a shitsu, and it had it's tail and the ears and the four paws spray-painted orange.  i just wanted to kill it and put it out of its misery because it was sooo ugly.  --steph--

...but if I know youuuu, I know what you doooo!!!  You'll love me at once... *manly voice* THE WAY YOU DID OOOOOOONCE... UPOOOON... AAAAA... DREAAAM...oooooooh Prince Phillip...one of the few disney characters I still have a crush on  --cali--

babies are basically baked potatoes that cry --dr. stanford--


so if you're ever bored in Barstow...which is pretty much a redundancy...  --dr. stanford--

you can put some serious stuff in chocolate eggs.  --alessio--

alessio:  c'era una volta, molto molto tempo fa, una vecchia che viveva in una stalla con le sue galline.  un giorno, la vecchia si alzo ando in bagno e vide un gatto che la guardava.
(english translation:  once upon a time, a long time ago, an old woman lived in a stable with her chicken.  one day, the old woman got up and went to the bathroom and saw a cat looking at her.)
ka:  where was her chicken to save her from the cat?

kim:  he is married, but he's a rock star, so fuck that
mariel:  yea, i'm sure he whores though, so if you don't mind vd and having his love child you'd be fine
kim:  sweet
mariel:  you can't say sweet to VD
kim: oh, sorry...i'll control myself...
mariel:  love child yes, vd no


steph:  i'm afraid i might fall
allison:  at least everyone would see your shoes.

if you always wanted to be in the movie biz,  i think it's the best way...porn over prostitution. plus they usually give you well packaged men, rather than pathetic business men  --collette (in response to ka's 'porn star' question, on 106isms page)--

you've got to learn these things.  italian style, eh?  --alessio--

say you have two short parents from Bangladesh, and they move to Glendale and have a child.  so the child grows up   in Glendale, which of course stunts you in other ways...   --dr. stanford--

i had to arrange blocks for the IQ test...i guess if i put the nose in the wrong place i was an Al Queda or something...  --dr. stanford--

i can't move like that.  i'm not cirque de soleil.  --matt--

joanna:  see the kid with the white knee high socks?
ka:  i like his matching sweatband
<a few minutes pass>
joanna:  you know that takes a lot of coordination
ka:  what? playing basketball?
joanna:  no, i'm still on the socks

mary kate:  well, call me crazy but...
ka:  okay, crazy.


joey:  yes, but there's no beer in heaven.
morgan:  there is in mine.

MIT...made in taiwan.  that's me.  and i go to MIT.  --mingyi hung--

kyle:  i built the fire
ka:  so that's why it's flaming

i love the cock  --kyle--

kyle:  i apologize for my behavior
chris n:  oh, if you hadn't said anything i wouldn't have noticed.  i just would've thought you were really flamboyant.

chris n:  i'm going to drink my cookie now.

mariel:  if you were a superhero, what would your theme song be?  will's was *phone static* bon bon.
kim:  shake your bon bon?

kim's away message:  if you were a superhero, what would your theme song be?
jon:  that bass line from MUIN class

you know what they make at subway?  sandwiches.  i think we should make a sandwich
--spring break 2003 hobbit kid--

kim: & from that first hug, we all just knew...'cause zach never let us hug him, he was always too angry
mariel:  there was too much rage in that machine.


kim:  he just needs something to keep him busy when he's onstage
mariel:  yea, like maybe a rubrik's cube?
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