.~.~.The Place.~.~. The outskirts of Atlas, a town of quiet home life, is where our story takes place in friends of Xelloss, Chiko and Kira's house. Or, to be more specific, the backyard. For the most part.

.~.~.The Setting.~.~. Xelloss is inviting everybody over to Chiko and Kira's house so they don't have to pay at the inn...Of coarse, with our telling Chiko and Kira...

"Xelloss, are you sure your friends are normal? I mean, they ARE YOUR friends after all," Filia ranted on as Xelloss continued to explain, as he had already done many times that day, that these friends of his were perfectly safe, though not completely sane.

"Don't worry, my darling Filia-san, these two teenaged girls are completely normal-" Xelloss was cut off by a high-pitched scream from somewhere inside the house. "For the most part."

"AAHHHHH! YOU FREAK, WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR?"

"Interest's sake."

"You are SO going to pay for that!" Two young girl's voices could be heard from the home, one in monotone, and the other in a highly annoyed tone. All of a sudden, the wooden door flew open, and a girl around 14 with light blue skin, shoulder-length dark blue hair and rabbit ears and tail came flying out the door, past the gang, her turquoise eyes closed, and smashed square into an oak tree. A rather large oak tree. Another girl could be seen hammering the door back into place. She had black skin with blue stripes across her face, and don't forget the cat ears and tail. She smiled as her gaze fell upon Xelloss.

"Why, hello there, Xelloss-kun! How are you? I see these are some friends of yours?" She asked in a pleasant manner.

"Um, excuse me for seeming rude, but does this sort of thing happen regularly?" Filia asked. Then cat-girl smiled.

"Oh, no! Not that often at all! Less that last month," she said.

"And how often did this happen last month?" Filia questioned. The cat-girl thought.

"About 20 times!" She answered happily. Filia's tail popped out as she turned on Xelloss.

"XELLOSS, I THOUGHT YOU SAID THESE GIRLS WERE NORMAL!" She yelled, pulling out her mace and beating on Xelloss.

"Uh, excuse me for asking, but is that a dragon tail?" The cat-girl asked. Filia looked up from her pummeling and looked at her.

"Why, yes it is," she replied, then hit Xelloss on the head before he could say anything.

"Oh." The cat-girl looked at her friend who had now sat up.

"Oh, lookie, mommy! Lookie at all the colourful birdies!" The bunny-girl exclaimed, pointing to invisible something or others above her head. The cat-girl sighed and walked over to her friend.

"Up you get, Kira. Come on now," she said, helping the dazed girl up. The bunny-girl, Kira, shook her head and smiled. She walked over to the gang, or, Zelgadiss.

"Hello there, uh, Kira," he said pleasantly. She laughed and fell at his feet.

"Blue! Mwahahahahahahahaha! Blue! Hehehe...teehee..." She said. The cat-girl walked over and kicked her in the head.

"You're blue too, you idiot," she pointed out.

"So? Blue is cool!" Kira laughed. She sat up and shook her head again.

"I'm sorry, I think she's still under shock from hitting that oak tree a thousand times," the other girl said. Filia gasped.

"Oh, Filia, that girl couldn't have hit that tree a thousand times!" Xelloss said. "Why, the last time I saw you, it was three years ago. That would make it..." He paused and did some calculations in his head. "Only 998 times she hit that tree!" He exclaimed, finger in the air.

Filia swayed.

"Actually, Xelloss, this is the 999 time," Cat-girl corrected.

Filia fainted.

"Well, excuse me, Chiko," he said with a smile. "Anyway, can we come in now?"

"Huh? What do you mean 'we'?" Chiko glared at Xelloss, who had taken a step back. He was a mazoku, yes, but he had his fears. This was one of them. Chiko angry.

"Well, when I asked you if I could come, I meant 'we'. You see, it's just a mix up of words, Chiko my dear!" Fire erupted around Chiko.

"MIX UP OF WORDS MY @$$!" She yelled.

"Um..."Xelloss stared down at his cape and spit on it, putting out a fire on the tip.

"Hey, Xelloss-san, you should really run, you know..." Kira said.

"Yeah, I know..." He said, turning around and paused, then turned back. "But that would only make it worse." Chiko's eyes were now red. She kicked him to the moon.

"Ahh, that felt better! Well, come on, guys. I guess we'll find room for you somehow!" Chiko said, leading the others into the house. Filia woke up and followed them in, a cheering Baby Val on her back. Zelgadiss looked up.

"She has a very strong kick..." he just ignored Xelloss and followed everyone in the house.

************************ "Aaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwww... come on... pleeeeaaaaase... you have zillions of magical books, talismans and a whole ROOM full of weapons. Why won't you let me see them?" Lina pleaded.

"First of all... I've had tons of people steal books, not before being blown to the moon and haven the book taken back, but it's the thought that counts, the weapons are all in a shack outside and I am not about to go out in that rain to take off the wards and unlock the locks etc., and third... "everyone looked at Chiko expectantly " I'm hungry, lets eat." Everyone except Chiko and Kira face faulted.

"Excuse me?" Filia politely asked, "but what do you mean rain, the sun was shining not a minute ago?"

"That's because this is the outskirts of Atlas and they have weird weather." Chiko replied. As Kira and Chiko sat their guests at a very long table in the dining room, they heard a very loud KABOOM from outside. Everyone looked at each other, and then rushed outside. Everybody except Kira and Chiko. They set out plates and utensils.

"What was that?" Filia asked, bolting out the door and looking around. A large was found in the ground. Xelloss crawled out.

"Oh, it's no biggie. Just Xelloss coming back from his trip to the moon. And if he dares mess with me again, I'll give him a one way ticket to the moon!" Chiko yelled from inside the house.

"How'd she know?" Zelgadiss asked Xelloss, who was now leaning on his staff for support. "She was inside the house, she didn't even know it WAS Xelloss!"

"Trust me, she has her ways. Damn little-" Xelloss started.

"XELLOSS METALLIUM-KUN, I CAN HEAR YOU JUST FINE FROM IN HERE! " Chiko yelled again. Xelloss shuddered.

"Let's go back into the house for dinner, shall we?" Gourry suggested.

"Yeah! FOOD! FOOD! FOOD!" Lina said, grabbing Gourry and Amelia's shirts and dragging them into the house, followed by Filia cuddling Baby Val, and Zelgadiss. Xelloss staggered to the door, waited a few seconds, then entered the house perfectly normal as if nothing had happened.

"It's about time! Geese, I was beginning to get worried, Xelloss-kun," Kira said with a grin. The gang sat down in their proper places. Kira at one end of the table, Chiko at the other. On Chiko's left was a smiling Xelloss. On her right was a drooling Lina, holding her fork and knife up in the air, with a similar Gourry beside her. Next to Xelloss was Amelia, sitting nicely, as a princess should. Until the food came of course. Beside Amelia sat a calm Zelgadiss, who was trying to ignore Gourry and Lina's antics. Across from Zelgadiss was Filia, cuddling and cooing Baby Val, Next to her sat Kira, feet up on the table, waiting to be fed. She was hungry, dammit! Chiko rang the bell. A young boy around 16, 17, walked into the room with a tray of food. A very large tray of food. Kira began to drool until Chiko slapped her upside the head, Lord of Nightmares knows how. She was at one end, while Kira was at the other.

"Get up off your butt and help serve the food!" Chiko ordered.

"Why?" Kira questioned.

"One, because WE'RE the hostesses, not them, Two," the Bishounen ran away, "the Bishounen just ran away, and Three, well, I have no number three! But I'm working on it!" Kira reluctantly got up and helped to serve the food.

"Everyone have food? Okay!" Kira said, jumping into her chair and shoveling food into her mouth.

"KIRA! Chiko yelled. Kira dropped her fork.

"What?" She asked with a mouth full of mashed potatoes and gravy.

"Save some taters for me and pass the potatoes and gravy^_^" Chiko said.

"Sure thing!" Kira said, spitting potatoes on Filia and Baby Val, who was nibbling on a carrot and had the misfortune of sitting beside her. The potatoes got passed down the line and Chiko dished herself a foot high pile of the stuff and drowned it in gravy. Every person at that table was eating like pigs, shoveling as much food in their mouth as it is humanly possible without choking to death. Everyone except for Filia, who was feeding Baby Val smashed peas and carrots. Xelloss rolled his eyes at her. Why did she love that little brat so much? The Mazoku thought to himself. Shrugging it off, he began stuffing his face with sushi.

"Okay, who's ready for dessert?" Kira asked once all the food was safely tucked in everyone's stomachs.

"FOOD! FOOD! FOOD! " Shouted Lina and Gourry.

"I want some!" Amelia said with a smile. Stupid princess, Kira thought.

"..." Zelgadiss said nothing, but sat back in his chair.

"ME! "Xelloss cried, shooting his hand in the air.

"Xelloss, you don�t need to eat, you're a Mazoku!" Filia yelled at him.

"Yeah, so? I can eat if I want to." He argued. Fire rushed around the two as they stood up. Filia made her way over to where Xelloss was sitting. Chiko casually shot an energy blast at the two, shutting them up.

"In the other room you two. We want dessert nicely cooked, not burnt, if you don't mind," she said. Gourry looked puzzled.

"I don't get it," he said. Lina turned on him.

"Are you seriously that stupid? Think, jellyfish brains, if they start fighting, we'll have fireballs and energy blasts firing all over the place, not to mention maces! Our dessert will be ruined!" Lina explained to him, adding in a few punches for emphasis.

"FOOD, RUINED? NEVER! " Gourry stood up and unsheathed his Sword of Light. Xelloss and Filia saw him, shut up, and sat down.

"That's better," Chiko said, sitting down.

"What IS for dessert, Kira?" Filia asked, leaning over and whispering in Kira's ear.

"I, uh, I don't really know^_^" She replied. Filia face faulted. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!" ~whoa, calm donw filia~ she thought to herself. "You don't know what's for dessert? But aren't you the hostess?"

"Yeah, but I'm not the cook! Do you seriously expect ME to cook?" Kira asked with a smirk.

"She'd set the kitchen on fire," Chiko said to a stunned Filia. "The house, too, as a matter of fact," Xelloss put in. "She's done it before, and I don't think she'll hesitate to do it again!"

Filia sighed. "Well, who does all your cooking?" Filia asked. "Bishies." Kira responded. Before Filia had a chance to ask what in the name of LON Bishies were, dessert was set on the table before them by 3 young men.

"FOOD!" Everyone shouted as their greedy little eyes fell upon the six or seven or nine or twenty different desserts, ranging from hot apple pie to ice cream and cherry pie...

"Yummmy..." was the last thing anyone heard before digging in to dessert.

Well, that was chapter one, hope you enjoyed it. Email us with feedback here.

YAY!!! Chapter TWO is up!!! Take a look!

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