| Until Then- March 1, 2005 |
| It was while I was dreaming that I thought about it all. I wondered why I hadn't received a letter or a call. It wasn't until then that I saw just what I see. I see that you are never really there for me. Now that I look back, I can see all the signs. It seems back then I must have been blind. It wasn't until that night that I heard what i hear. I hear distant footsteps that will never bring you near. It was while I was driving that I saw a vision. My thoughts collided and landed between a rock and a decision. It wasn't until then that I wondered why I hadn't felt this before. Before I thought you were someone I adored. Until then I just kept everything to myself. I was played by every trick in the cards that were dealt. And it was while I was sitting here that I thought about you. I wondered what it was that I could've done to you. It wasn't until then that I saw what I see. I then realized you didn't see what I could be. You only saw me as now or then. Not the person I could've been. Until then I could never feel so free. Until then, you'll always be a memory. |
| Just A Stain- July 6, 2005 |
| I thought you weren't the same. How could you be so mean? I almost trusted you; You came off so squeaky clean. But now it's over, and I was completely wrong. I sit here again singing the same sad song. You could've been my hero. You could've been my friend. Now you're just a zero And I don't want to see you again. You could've meant the world to me. You could've been my everything. But now my blinded eyes, the see. And in my life, you were just a stain. I thought I could trust you; How could I be so blind? I almost tore down all my walls and opened up my mind. But now it's over, and my barriers are crumbled. I look only to find the very paths that I've already stumbled. You could've been my lover. You could've been my friend. Now I see it was only a cover. And I don't want to see you again You could've been a gold medal for me. You could've been my every dream. But now my blinded eyes, they see. And in my life, you were just a stain. |
| Good Company- July 15, 2005 |
| I overlooked all the things I wished not to see. I thought you were someone I know, now, you couldn't be. Why is it that people cover themselves with beautiful disguises? All that's left after is a wound and a soul that despises. Life doesn't go by fairy-tales, so 'ever after' and sappy. And it seems I could never do enough to even make you happy. You thought of every way I could change. Why, is it because you didn't like me? Looks like I've fallen into your every trap so perfect and beautifully. I've finally seen right through you, and I don't like what I see. You were always looking for someone else. Did you do that just to spite me? I clung on to every word, but you proved that's not as good as it gets. And I want you to know, that I've finally had it. Tired of playing Mr. Nice Guy to everyone who treats me bad. Tired of being 'good company' just to make you glad. I'm sorry we became friends again. It was all a big mistake. Sorry to disappoint you, but there's only so much I can take. So, say 'Goodbye' to the person you once knew as me. Say 'Hello' to the cold, lonely world of your new enemy. |
| Walking In Circles- July 20, 2005 |
| I sit here now and wait. You can give me some lame excuse, but I know. You're back now. But for how long? You pretend nothing happend; I wondered too soon; You're gone. I sit here wondering. Why do you make me cry? I can tell it will never be enough, always two cents shy. You always keep me guessing. I hate it when you play. Live by your own rules; You'll have it no other way. I find myself walking in circles, and I can't find my way out. And I know if I keep doing this, you'll be amused by me, no doubt. I know I have to let you go. It's something I must do. Because I don't want to lose myself, just to be with you. |
| Those Dark Tequila Nights-August 1, 2005 |
| The glasses still smell of tequila and so does my floor. It was quite funny when I ran into the door. I exchanged my 'quila for some Puerto Rican run. Haven't got it yet, but it will soon sit safely in my tum'. Next time I willl be sure to take more 'quila shots. But last time it had my stomach twisting and turning in knots. There will be a next time, many next times I say! How about tomorrow, or how about today? What drunkards we are, you'll have to visit me at school. Because you know the stories about how Oxford's parties are cool. |
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