Season One(the complete first season guide)

Season one of Cheez Log was great. We established new characters like "Fetus Phil" and "Chester Loge"(aka Chett aka Killa Chee). We had fun. Tyler was beaten up by Jennifer Hopez, Ben Affleck helped wreak revenge. A lot of crazy stuff happened too. We had Tony of Cheez Log Miami hack into our satelitte feed, we had OJ Simpson running for president, we had the first ever "Fetus Fight," it's amazing how everything worked out this season. We had Michael Jackson sponser the show, and finally we had something that made CNN pee in their pants...an exclusive interview with Saddam! Thanks everyone for tuning in to season one. And if this is your first time seeing Cheez Log, see all the fun you missed:

Episode 54-28 The season finale of Cheez Log featured almost every single re-occuring character that has ever been on the show, including; Saddam, Yoda, Chett, Fetus Phil, Crisco, OJ Simpson, and Tony of Cheez Log Miami. There was a tribute to all the cast members of the show that are no longer with us. A special thank you to Innisfail for letting Cheez Log use their music. Tyler read letters by fans including a disgruntled Rosie O'Donnell. She thought That Fetus Phil was aborted and was very upset. Fetus Phil had only one word for her..."beotch." For the record Fetus Phil is alive and unborted. There was also a rap up on all the different Cheez Logs accross the world. Thank you everyone for a great season, we'll see you in Season 2! Or to make it look all hardcore Season II. YAY YAY!

Episode 54-27 Cheez Log returns with a better satellite feed. Tyler tells his story of confronting the Cheez Log Miami Crew in Pictorals. Tyler stabs Tony with a spork, Gary Coleman's corpse comes out of the wound, Tyler stomps on Embyro Elvis, and grates Paco El Cheez Log to make Mexican style pizza. Chett Busts a flow about voting for him for president, slanders Tyler and Tyler opens a can of whoop ass. A new character on the show, his name is Crisco and he's Frodo's Uncle. Crisco tells about how he's the legal guardian of Frodo and wants his money. Saddam Sings a song about which country is really nuts and Tyler rocks the spot like always. Tune in for Episode 54-28 which is the Season Finale! This show featured "The Cheez Log Theme Song" performed by MeatLoaf.

Episode 54-26 This is the lost episode which was never seen due to the hacking of the Cheez Log's satellite feed by Cheez Log Miami. What went on this show will remain unknown until the Special Edition DVD comes out with it featured as an extra.

Episode 54-25 Tyler announces the winner of the "Cheez Log Number 1 Fan Contest." But before he chooses who wins he shows the process of choosing the winner. That process is looking through their bedroom window and judging the rooms. Chett and Fetus Phil return with another track called "Cheesecake." Tyler exposes his boob during the middle part of the show and causes controversy. Updated info on a Cheez Log Documentary coming out in October, as well as more info on Cheez Log:The Animated Series and the Cheez Log Soundtrack.
The song playing in the intro of the show was "Inside" by Innisfail.

Episode 54-24 Cheez Log goes political with ads from presidential hopefuls like; OJ Simpson, Saddam Hussein, and Yoda. Early polls show OJ as a favorite. Probably because his political slogan is: "Vote OJ Simpson, or he'll kill you." Also, Chett and Fetus Phil do a duet for the song "Swiss." Tyler explains the process of Groundhog's day by suggest Ruben from American Idol standing in the beach and if he shades everyone on the beach there would be two more weeks of winter. Not to be confused with the original concept of Groundhog's Day: Having Rosie O'Donnell sit in a theatre and if she sat next to everyone in the theatre she would be delcared a fat ass...and there would be six more weeks of winter.
The song playing in the intro was "Again" by Tucson's own, Innisfail.

Episode 54-23 A clarification, ELMO, the furry red creature of Seasame Street� is alive and well...unfortunately. There was some confusion over last week's show about ELMO. A pictoral story about what Tyler did over the weekend. He aided Ben Affleck(Tyler's cousin) after the breakup with J.HO, or Jennifer Hopez. The guys threw eggs at her cave(fooled by rocks that she's got, you know cave, and rocks, rocks are in caves, get it...ah screw you). Jennifer Hopez jumps onto the Benmobile, she punches threw the windshield giving Tyler a blackeye. Ben cuts off her finger that has the 1.5million dollar ring on it. Ben gets the ring back. Later, the guys leave a steaming pile of poo in a paper bag that is lit on fire in front of J.Ho's cave(ha ha rocks that's she's got, ha ha ha). Hopez stomps out fire, but due to the fact she wears so much flammable perfume, she goes up into flames. Affleck doses Hopez with bucket of cat piss(don't ask) to reveal Hopez is really a terminator sent back through time to be the biggest hoe in the world(mission accomplished). (Get Hopez Wear HERE)Hopez runs after the guys, only to get ran over by Ahnold in his Hummer. Ahnold gives guys ride to strip club where Ahnold gropes women and drinks alcohol. Tyler and Ben win "Coolest People in the World Awards." Check out that fan letter Tyler read on the air:
Dear Cheezer,
-----Over the past year, i've been exposed to all sorts of crappy shows. There was Joe Millionaire and queer eye for the queer inside guy, and boy meets boy or the spoof on dumb and dumber gay and gayer. There were also awful shows like The Simple Life, and CSI MIAMI, I was just about to throw away my tv set, when I accidently stepped on my remote and it changed the channel, what I saw was the best show ever made. It was a blessing to my eyes, an answer to my TV viewing prayers, it made life worth living, that show was your show, Cheez Log. The talking Fetus guy, the Saddam, the You, it was really the best thing I've ever seen. You refused to jump into the loop with the rest of the people out there and have gay characters on your show. In fact, my brother...a die hard viewer of your show, told me that you once had a gay mexican that smelled like dead, rotting fish on your show. Then you fired him when you found out he was trying to shack up with you. You make being a straight guy more popular then being a homo. and I thank you for that. I kept my tv set and I only watch your show. Thanks Logger of the Cheez.
--------------------------------------------------Jesus
PS when people ask me to show them a sign that life is worth living, I send them a clip of the christmas show. Its a real suicide extinguisher.
PPS oh yeah hhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
This week's show had Innisfail's "Play" as the intro track to the show. Go to HERE fore more info on the band.

Episode 54-22 There was an ode in the beginning of the show to a fellow Cheez Log cast member who died. Chino Montana, the beloved Cheez Log from Cheez Log:Miami was melted on cheddar cheese fries. Fetus Phil announced that he will be the first man on Mars, boy is he upset.
QUOTE:
TYLER: Feeling the pressure of walls closing in on you? Is the water getting too deep? do you feel like you are being pushed?
FETUS PHIL: Are you making fun of me for being a fetus?
Chett and Mike Tyson both announce they are running for the Independent vote for President, each had their ads that were approved by them. In Tyson's ad, he promised bombs, biting, and lower taxes, he also killed Saddam and chewed on his head. Boxing match ensues between Chett and Mike, leaving Mike the victor in the fastest known boxing match since the Clone Wars(yoda vs yoda episode 54-00).

Episode 54-21 Cheez Log Miami

Episode 54-20 Cheez Log makes some major announcements on the new Cheez Log movie. Tells some pictoral stories as well as dance the night away. Chett raps about being a Cheez Log, but no one really cares. Tyler throws a stick at Mike Tyson, starting a riot where Fetus Phil is injured. Later on, Cheez Log talks about Britney Spears and dances.

Episode 54-19 Fetus Phil tells the story about how him and Britney got married. Tyler realizes it wasn't Britney Spears that Mike Tyson killed and ate for thanksgiving, it was actually Cathy Bates. Easy Mistake.

Episode 54-18 First new episode of 2004. Tyler tells the true story of what he did for Christmas with his cousin Ben Affleck and Jennifer Hopez. Later, Chett "busts a flow" about the hard knock life of being Cheese. It had a positive message. Also, Michael Jackson sponsors the show. Show makes millions. Happy New Year!

Episode 54-00/54-00 REPEATS DUE TO THE FACT THE SHOW DIDN'T HAVE ENOUGH MONEY TO MAKE NEW SHOWS. MONEY WAS SPENT ON GETTING CRACK...I MEAN SADDAM TO DO AN INTERVIEW WITH US.

Episode 54-17 The Christmas Episode(aka holiday episode). We celebrate three different holidays; Christmas, Hannukah, and Kwanzaa. Tyler talks smack about people who refer to Christmas as "X-mas." Later, Tyler does a randition of "Let It Snow" with Fetus Phil in the best duet since Whitney and Mariah. Also, Tyler reads a special version of "Twas the Night Before Christmas." Saddam gave gift ideas, and Mike Tyson killed someone. Happy Holidays Everyone!

Episode 54-16 Ben Affleck makes a special guest appearance on Cheez Log(He does the voice of Chett). Also, Tyler tells his deeply moving story about how Hemroidal Cream isn't just for the anus. Saddam does an exclusive interview with us after his capture. Costs so much money to get him that Cheez Log has to cancel two episodes. Later, Chett sings "My Heart Will Go On," Tyler stabs Chett, spreads him on burrito.

Episode 54-15 Chett tells a story about how his rap career first started. Tyler falls asleep and Yoda suffers from alcohol poisoning. Fetus Phil attacks Tyler and Tyler bites him. Show is taken hostage by Iraqi Liberals and negotiate the release of Ahmad Shallin Shello Shillie for Chett. Government does not comply, Chett Gets killed, melted and enjoyed on Nachos.

Episode 54-14 Fetus Phil crawls out of his womb to get tickets to see newest Matrix movie. Later, he kicks it with Saddam in one of his underground hideouts. Then, Saddam tries to eat Phil, cause he's hungry. Mike Tyson jumps in and eats Saddam's Head. Meanwhile, Tyler Sings showtunes.

Episode 54-13 Chett shoots up the place and gets arrested. Tyler bails him out. Later that night Chett makes a deal with his drug dealer and whacks the snitch that turned him in. Just like every other episode of Cheez Log.

Episode 54-12 Thanksgiving episode. Tyler gave thanks to a whole bunch of crap. Naturally, Chett fell asleep. Saddam gave turkey cooking ideas(aka Turkey the country), Mike Tyson gave tips on what the highlight of a meal should be, and a turkey was beheaded. We also introduced a new character named "Fetus Phil."

Episode 54-11 We tell our wacky adventures we had on a trip to New York. AIDS were going around the office and Photon got sick. Chett is immune...lucky bastid. Britney Spears is supposed to be on show, Mike Tyson kills her...err I mean Britney Spears had to fly home she had the flu, yeah that's it.

Episode 54-09/54-10 Cheez Log: Miami...need I say more?

Episode 54-08 Spooky Halloween episode. There were gruesome scary tales, special guests and people started dying on the air. We killed off our whole cast! But the magic of television brings them all back to life. Hope you were all scared and enjoyed your halloween!

Episode 54-07 We finally got the Tiger that attacked Roy on the show. He told all the viewers about his vacation in San Francisco. We also premiered Cheez Log: In Outer Space. Which was a blast...did you know that Cheez Log:In Outer Space has an Asian version of it? Neither did we. Next week is the Halloween show, be afraid!

Episode 54-06 The episode featured guests Yoda doing an impression of Ah-nold, as well as Mike Tyson speaking for Roy. We also had the tiger talk to us via satelitte, but someone forgot to pay the DirectTV bill. We also had "joke, not a joke" as well as deleted scenes from the show.

Episode 54-05 Cheez Log went voodoo on that ass with spirit pocession by Bill Clinton, R. Kelly and Mr. Roboto. Got updates from Saddam Hussein and Yoda as well as special appearance by Mike Tysom. The show also featured music from Innisfail, Tucson's best local band. WOO! INNISFAIL ROCKS!!!

Episode 54-04 Mike Tyson whooped ass on Yoda on this episode. Mike ripped the ear off of poor Yoda. He's currently undergoing surgery. Tyler discussed Bennifer news and the violence that insued when J. Lo thought she could sing karaoke to the 80's hit "Safety Dance" by Men Without Hats. COMING SOON... The actual set list for the show. See what Tyler is reading when he's doing the show. Its the Cheez Log Plan of Content! A plan that sometimes fails ::tear:: I kid.

Episode 54-03 Today's show was great. Our resident janitor Mike Tyson stopped by to talk for a bit. One of Saddam's lookalikes was on the show singing about "dont be fooled by the stand-ins that I got, I'm the real Saddam from Iraq." Also, an announcement of a boxing match for the next episode with Mike Tyson and a secret other fighter. More news on the Cheez Log movie and the official reopening of Cheez Log Online(yay!).

Episode 54-02 Repeat of last show. Tyler was out of town on official business. Making deals with MTV and promoting the Cheez Log movie overseas. Tyler apologizes and will make sure that it happens again.

Episode 54-01 Cheez Log returns with a new theme song. A special remix featuring; Snoop Dogg, Mr. Humpty, Yoda and Saddam. Check Out the Lyrics. Tyler surprises Chett with a visit from his father that he hasn't seen since he was a little string cheese. Information on the Cheez Log Movie. More news than you could possible fit in your rectom. Saddam stops by while he's playing hide and go seek. Also, we bring you info on the new website for Cheez Log.

Hosted by www.Geocities.ws