Episode 54-50: "Get to know Tyler More"
Tyler's story was played out in pictorals this week, featuring the tales of how Tyler was a struggling underage male stripper in Boston, to his Adult film career, to his helping his cousin Ben Affleck make it big in movies. It is also revealed that Tyler has a twin brother by the name of Benjamin(what can we say, the family loves Ben). Yoda comes at you with a scene from the Special Limited Deluxe Edition of Star Wars Episode II:Attack of the Clones and everyone is shocked to discover that Yoda has done some other projects besides Cheez Log. Chett busts a flow and Oprah stops by to give everyone no the show a new car. Tom Delonge and Mark Hoppus perform a new version to the "Cheez Log Theme" as well.
Episode 54-49: "Return of the Fetus"
The whole story is played out in pictorals of the humble beginnings of Fetus Phil. We get more indepth showing you things you never knew about Phil before including an insight into who Fetus Phil's father really is. Yoda reviews the TV movie about Fetus Phil's life starring that kid from Sith Sense and Eric Roberts as Tyler. We go live via satelitte to Dirk the Dingo in prison. Dirk is out but he left a poopie for the camera, it is then revealed that Phil had escaped through the rectom of Dirk the Dingo. Fetus Phil returns to the show. Testtube Teddy has to be fired due to the law in Arizona that states that no television show may have more than one talking fetus. Teddy tries to sing a song but it irritates Fetus Phil who shoots Testtube Teddy. The breaking of the testtube exposes Teddy to the real world causing a chemical reaction making Teddy a giant freak Michael Jackson. Dirk the Dingo returns only to be eaten by Big Freak Teddy. Teddy picks up Fetus Phil and throws him. Luckily, Ted Danson star of Cheers and Becker catches Phil and returns the fetus to his mom. Ted Danson then throws his limited edition Cheers coasters at the freak decapitating him. Ted Danson was quoted as saying; "There is only room for one Ted on TV and that's me!" The Return of Fetus Phil was a memorable event, and Tyler and Phil summed it up by singing "Happy Together".
Episode 54-48: "Pt.2"
Tyler shows a deleted scene from last week's pictoral, involving everyone's favorite gay Magician Roy Horn and his crippled ass. Tyler makes Roy's wheelchair disappear. That's right! It's on eBay right now! Starting bid at $0.01. Meanwhile, the search for Fetus Phil continues, Mike Tyson checked the toilets, Saddam checked his missile warehouse, and Yoda check his bed, but Fetus Phil was nowhere to be seen. Dirk once again denies everything. Testtube Teddy does spine-tingling version of "Billy Jean." Chett shows off his rhyming skills and the return of CHEEZ LOG: JAPAN.
Episode 54-47: "Two Weeks Back"
Tyler returns to the show after being in New Zealand filming the Cheez Log Movie Sequels. Tyler comes back to find that Fetus Phil is missing. Tyler still continues on with show with the help of Testtube Teddy doing a song from his dad's collection of songs. The search for Fetus Phil continues. Yoda comes by reviews a few movies, Saddam sets asside his Mustard Gas making to talk with us on what's going on in Iraq and Dirk the Dingo refuses to admit to eating Fetus Phil.
Episode 54-46: "Fetus Log"
Fetus Phil takes over hosting duties while Tyler is in New Zealand. Fetus Phil welcomes Mike Tyson back to the show to find out what's been up since he was fired. He's been hanging with OJ. Fetus Phil also talks with Saddam and sings the theme song to Cheers with him. Yoda Stops by the show to review a few films. Fetus Phil re-assures us he is safe from Dirk the Dingo. We meet a new character on the show by the name of Shoe. Shoe is a the unborn Fetus of Michael Jackson who is in a test tube. Fetus Phil gives Shoe the new name of "Test Tube Teddy." Saddam comes back to do a song with Fetus Phil called "Still P-H-I-L." At the end of the show we are left with a cliffhanger. Dirk the Dingo has Fetus Phil in his mouth...DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNNN! What happened? No one knows! But either way, thanks to Fetus Phil for hosting the show.
Episode 54-45: "Welcome Back, Ma$e Style"
Show returns after being off the air for two weeks. Saddam tells us about the trial, and the introduction to Dirk the Dingo, the newest character on the show. Cheez Log also takes phone calls from the fans. Fans get new name; fans of Cheez Log will no longer be called "Cheez Loggers," fans of the show will no be refered to as "Cheezalos" and "Cheezalettes." Thank yous go out to the callers for calling in!
Episode 54-44: "Spider Log"
Tyler goes to the premiere of Spider-Man 2. He makes out with Kirsten Dunst, fights Leonardo DiCaprio(dressed as Doc Ock) and throws Kate Winslett to a bunch of black men on MLK BLVD. Ben Affleck tries to glory hog like always, Tyler teaches him a lesson. Remember, just because they are cousins, doesn't mean they won't beat each other up for top billing. Chett busts a flow with good friend Paulie Parmesian, Saddam updates us, and Yoda reviews movies.
Episode 54-43: "It's How it Happened"
Cheez Log came back with a new episode of "Yoda @ the Movies." Yoda reviewed the spring movies and gave us too much info on what he does thinking about the movie "New York Minute." We had a new theme song sung by Tom Delonge of Blink 182. We also had Saddam sing a few songs. It was fun all around. But we got serious. The show has been affected by the recent budget cuts to Access television. Tyler told everyone what had to be cut: no four H2 Hummers for Fetus Phil, now he can only settle for two, Chrisco....dead, and Gabriella was cut(get it? Cutting the Cheese? ha ha ha, oh man, good stuff).
Episode 54-43: "It's How it Happened"
Cheez Log came back with a new episode of "Yoda @ the Movies." Yoda reviewed the spring movies and gave us too much info on what he does thinking about the movie "New York Minute." We had a new theme song sung by Tom Delonge of Blink 182. We also had Saddam sing a few songs. It was fun all around. But we got serious. The show has been affected by the recent budget cuts to Access television. Tyler told everyone what had to be cut: no four H2 Hummers for Fetus Phil, now he can only settle for two, Chrisco....dead, and Gabriella was cut(get it? Cutting the Cheese? ha ha ha, oh man, good stuff).
Episode 54-42: "Don't Go There" Tyler interviewed Donald Trump, ran over Eric Roberts, and watched a unicorn tight rope walking over a pool of Great White Sharks. There was also an ice sculpture of the words "Cheez Log" with fireworks shooting over them. Chett busted a rhyme and Saddam did the first ever interactive "pull my finger" via satellite. . This was truly the biggest episode since Ben Affleck was on.
Episode 54-41: "Back with no Hat"
Cheez Log returns. Tyler tells the viewers what happened last week, how he got revenge and showed pictures of him and the rest of the cast of Shrek 2.
Episode 54-40: "The Lost Episode"
This show was supposed to air, but fell victim to satellite hacking from Cheez Log: Miami. Tyler had the cast of Shrek 2 on the show doing interviews and such. Then, Tyler played a prank on Chrisco. After that, Tyler dressed like Shrek and talked to little kids on the street. Tyler was arrested for violating his paroll. See, he's not allowed to be around children, due to a certain "incident" at a Breakers� Waterpark. Tyler met up with OJ Simpson, who was "framed" for the murder of Chrisco. Tyler makes a call into Cheez Log: Miami from his jail cell. Tone-e denies the hacking. Jesus comes down and breaks Tyler out. OJ is convicted of the murder of Chrisco. Just one crazy show that you'll have to wait for the season 2 DVD box set to see.
Episode 54-39: "Q and A"
Cheez log does a Q&A with Tyler, Fetus Phil and Saddam. Tyler also questions another show on the air, and charges them with stealing his ideas. The show is called "Davey's Fun Time Hour" and is a clear rip-off of Cheez Log. Chett busts a new flow and Yoda gives us some advice when it comes to movies. Later, Tyler talks with Fetus Phil. We then touch on the sensitive subject of abortion...sorta. Tyler keeps you up to date on new Cheez Log events and entertains the crowd like normal with his comedy style that Entertainment Weekly says "Master Comedy Genious, the next Jim Carrey, so entertaining, like a young Frank Sinatra." See next week's all celebrity show "shrek everlasting" with the cast of Shrek 2, Tivo that! It's going to be great!
Episode 54-38:"The Passion of the Chett"
The mythical story of Chett was told in the beginning of the show. The worship, the torture, the death and eventual resurrection of Chett. But resurrecting from a toilet? Stinky. We had Yoda back, still he seems to excited about "New York Minute." Sick green dude. We had a beautiful live studio audience who got to witness a new character by the name of Freddy the Fly. We played a game called "Guess what I'm infesting." Not the greatest games of all time, but what can we say, he's a fly. Cheez Log attempts to do news, everyone with A.D.D. change the channel. Fetus Phil sang a song, and Saddam updated us. Tyler proves once again, why he was voted "sexiest man alive" for 2004. If you get my drift. Yeah baby.
Episode 54-37:"Friends"
Cheez Log comes at you with a new theme song with Mr. Humpty, Meat Loaf and featuring Elvis. Tyler tells the story of the Cheez Log Party for the series finale of Friends. Tons of special guests, then everyone decides to watch re-runs of facts of life. Yoda reviews "New York Minute" like a pervert and Chett returns with a rap that would make 50 cent pee his pants. Fetus Phil and Tyler talk about new merchandise and new website. Tune in next week for "The Passion of the Chett."
Episode 54-36:"Patrick Duffy"
Political talks on Cheez Log? Yes, and we appologize. It won't happen again...until next week. WE KID! Also, on the discussion board, we talked about the Screenwriter rights and the possibility of a strike. Tyler gets upset when he realizes that he will on be making 5 cents per Cheez Log Movie DVD sold. Thinking about striking too. We go to Saddam for a quick update. Took calls, made shout outs, and this(we promise)is the last episode you hear Meat Loaf perform the Cheez Log Theme Song. An all new theme song is scheduled to be introduced on episode 54-37.
Episode 54-35:"A Two Week Vacation"
Cheez Log returns after taking a one week break. Tyler tells the story of what happened during those two weeks, including; trips to sweatshops, causing peace at the Gaza Strip, the killing of Miss. Aguilera. The show also featured an indepth discussion on abortion in which Fetus Phil spoke out against it. We visit Saddam again, and once again, he creeps us out. Last time to hear the original Cheez Log theme song was on this episode.
Episode 54-34:"Cheez Log Around The World"
Cheez Log visits different parts of the world for "Cheez Log Around the World. Tyler visits; Wisconsin(cheese capital and brainwashing capital of the world), Texas(where they kill pety crime people and touch each other), and Cheez Log in "undisclosed location"(with Saddam as host telling you what he's up to). There was also a special Yoda at the Movies with Chewbacca giving his two wookie cents about the movies and Yoda translating. Things got rough and Chewbacca killed Yoda...and ate his brains.
Episode 54-33:"Weekend at Britney's pt.2"
We conclude the "Weekend at Britney's" story. Yoda was grabbed out of the way of Rosie O'Donnell's two ton foot by TV's Eric Estroda from the hit series "CHIPS." Rosie chases after them until they run out of gas in Eric's motorcycle. They are stuck at the end of a pier as Rosie approaches. Yoda gets courage from the force and whips out his lightsaber, just then a shark pops out of the water and swallows Yoda whole, leaving Eric to fend for himself. Just then, Tom Cruise arrives in a helicopter to distract Rosie with her sick obsession with him. This gives time for Eric to strap three atomic bombs and Cyndi Lauper to one of Rosie's folds. She explodes sending half eaten twinkies and full buckets of lard across the city skyline. Oh yeah and Tyler and Britney get it on...sorta. We also discovered the father of Gabriella's baby, the Greedy Hobbit Crisco Baggins. We talk to her son, who looks like a freak Hobbit Log. We then talk to Crisco who is quoted as saying "I bet you didn't know my desk was a love making place." Tyler tries to talk to Fetus Phil for comfort but we discover that he is actually Fetus Crisco. Tyler wakes up and we discover that the last two episode of Cheez Log were all a dream. To thank everyone who watched, Tyler and Fetus Phil sang a Cheez Log song for all the viewers in the best televised duet since Whitney and Mariah. Wow...Good TV.
Episode 54-32:"Weekend at Britney's pt.1"
Tyler tells two parts of a three part pictorial about him and Gabriella flying to Miami to see a Britney Spears concert. A lot of crazy things including a run in with the twin brother of the late Tony from Cheez Log: Miami. His name was Toni and had a grudge against Tyler for killing his bro. Tyler decapitated him by hitting him with Britney Spears. Tyler met Britney after the concert where it was revealed that it was actually Rosie O'Donnell in a Britney Spears costume...TO BE CONTINUED. Tyler talked to Fetus Phil about the recent popularity of Fetus photos and his hatred for it. Later, we did the second part of the Britney story, envolving Rosie O'Donnell growing to become a huge Godzilla-esque monster(yes, we know that's not much of a stretch but hey. Tyler assembles the "awesome dudes," which includes Ashton Kutcher, Mike Tyson, Yoda, and the kid from who's the boss? Most are slaughtered, and we leave off with Rosie's foot over the defenseless Yoda. Then, Chett comes back as a zombie and Gabriella announces that she is pregnant. Tune in next week for the hair-raising conclusion of this Cheez Log two-parter.
Episode 54-31:"Antonio Log"
Tyler goes to the opening night of Cheez Log: The movie. Tyler shows what happened through a pictorial. He went with Ben Affleck(cousin) to the film, ran into the actors in the movie as well as a crazy aftershow party. We also met a friend of ours and had him on the show. Antonio (dramatic classical guitar here) Banderas co-hosted the show with Tyler. We hear ghost noises but we continue with the show. We also took calls and did zany things with cheese and mustard.
Episode 54-30:"A Chett Tribute"
We give a special tribute to our friend Chett, who unfortunately was killed in a freak midnight snack accident. We also talk to Binx the mouse who has an obsession with cheese. We also had a tribute to Cheez Log Japan, and again in slowmotion. IT WAS PLATINUM BABY, PLATINUM!
Episode 54-29:"Out with the Old in with the Cheez"(season 2)
Cheez Log comes at you with a new season. Fetus Phil joined us on the show and proclaimed his love for American Idol's� Kelly Clarkson. Tyler cut it short when it got too graphic. The show had deleted scenes from the Season One Finale, including a musical number featuring Chett and Fetus Phil. Also, the show announced its partnership with Coca-Cola� with the new cheese flavored coke. Tyler also did deleted scenes for the this very show. Included was an audio commentary with Fetus Phil and Tyler. And sadly, Chett, a longtime friend and co-host to the show was replaced by our new co-host Gabriella Gutta. Tyler will explain the connection between him and Gabriella, as well as a tribute to Chett on the next episode of Cheez Log.