| A Lady's Journal |
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| Alone, unnoticed, I sit in the shadows. I hear and see all the things that they think no one sees or hears. They ignore me. Why? I am a girl; and therefore, I must a brainless twit. By the way, they are my parents. I love them; but I cannot like them. My father is determined to have a son and heir. Unfortunately, he doesn't know that the birth of my still-born baby sister left my mother barren. If he knew, then he would cast us aside and find a new, young wife. My mother and I have agreement: We will tell him after I am wed, and my dowry is paid in full. After that, only my mother will rely on his good graces, and could live with me. I love her, but she is a brainless, superficial twit. I am betrothed in my father's interpretation of a "love-match." My father loves his gold; ergo, "love-match." I, however, love a man of high rank and good morals. Unlike the ancient letch my father prefers me to wed. He, unfortunately, is already married. His wife is a sickly old bat, but she is not a problem. My father is. If only my love wasn't married. |
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| HOME |
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| Again I sit here. Again no one notices me. I almost wish they would. I sit here sewing, and listen to them arguing. My love is a widower now; and I am a widow. Yes, I wed the rich bastard. He died the of a strange illness. My love and I will observe the prescribed year of morning; and, then, we will wed. I wish my love could come to me, but society keeps him away. Soon, though, we will be together. That is enough for me. You don't know my heart's name, do you? Well, I will give you a clue. His parents are the monarchs and he has no older siblings. If you can't guess who is from that clue, tu es stupide! Yes, that's French. My late husband was a Frenchman. Now, back to the matter at hand. My parents have stopped yelling. My father has a rather stunned expression on his face. He says, "You're WHAT?!?!" Oh no, she told him. Now I'm stuck with her. Oh Lord, I have to go. He's coming over here. |
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| Finally, it's here. My last day of mourning. He will come today. I know it. I'll not have time to write again today. The sun has set. We had venison, roast lamb, and steak for dinner. He did not come. |
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| I realized after I put you away why he didn't come yesterday: I was still in mourning. Surely, he will come today. He did not come. |
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| Where is he? He can't have forgotten me. We promised to wait for each other, 'til death--if need be. Why has he not come? If only to see my father. I wish he would come. I long to see him. Where is he? Perhaps he will come today. No. |
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| I know, I will write him a letter. That way he will know that I am still waiting for him. I must write it immediately. I have sent the letter. I should have a reply within a fortnight. |
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| The fortnight has passed; and, I have received no reply. Why? Perhaps, he did not receive the letter. I will try again. I have sent the second letter. Now, another fortnight's wait is before me. |
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| The second fortnight ends today. I hope that I receive a reply today. I will wait by the door. Night has fallen. I still have no reply. I will not give up. I will wait forever if I must. |
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| Father is taking me to London for the Season! I know my love will be there. He must be. |
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| I saw him!! He was with his mother at the opera. He is still as handsome as ever! I do not think he saw me, because he would have come to speak to me, or my father. I know he would have. |
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