Summary
This is a blog of my experiences and random thoughts at seminary.
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Catholic Thoughts Blog
Seminary Man
Friday, November 26, 2004, 1:24 AM
After some 16.5 hours on the road yesterday, crawling along in rain, sleet and snow, two diocean brothers and I made it home for Thanksgiving. That gave us a lot of time to chat, sleep, pray, and write a new parody song about our seminary. It's set to the tune of Billy Joel's Piano Man. Here is the first draft, a Catholic Thoughts exclusive:
It's 7 AM on a Thursday morn
The first year men shuffle in
Like cattle we take to the choir stalls
Lauds is about to begin
They insist that we chant it en Espanol (*1)
Though we're not really sure how it goes
It's sad but its sweet and I'll know it complete
When I wear a candidate's clothes (*2)
La-la-didi-da-da
Lada-didi-da-Senor
Sing us a song of the PCJ
Sing us a song McKnight (*3)
Cause we're all in the mood for a liturgy
And you'll make sure that its done right
Doc Ross squints as he teaches on Ratzinger
He's made academics his life
He studies, he crams, he checks our exams
And then he goes home to his wife
Jim at the pub's a DB of mine
But I still can't get drinks for free
I'll just have a Coke cause I know that I'm broke
'Til I get my next check from KC.'s (*4)
La-la-didi-da-da
Lada-didi-da-Cha-Ching
Sing us a song of the PCJ
Sing us a song McKnight
Cause we're all in the mood for a homily
And you've got us felling contrite
At 20 past 10 starts the Holy Mass
Father Herrera tip-toes in
For a mystical sign that transcends space and time
That will end the same time it begins (*5)
And the deacons are chatting 'bout heretics
Debating who ought to be stoned
Yes at times it is hard to be orthodox
But its better than thinking alone
Sing us a song of the PCJ
Sing us a song McKnight
Please excuse me for eating out once again
While you're having chicken tonight (*6)
La-la-didi-da-da
Lada-didi-bawk-bowk-bowk
I just beat the deacon into Vespers
and Monsignor gives me a smile
cause he knows it's J.C. that we're coming to see
who makes this formation worthwhile
And the organ it sounds like a wounded duck
And the cantor has wax in his ears (*7)
Yes we're singing the Salve too slowly
And poor Buffer is choking back tears (*8)
La-la-didi-da-da
Lada-didi-da-Salve
Sing us a song of the PCJ
Sing us a song McKnight
Cause we're all in the mood for a holiday
And we wish you a very goodnight
*1- On Thursday's we have Spanish liturgies; at morning prayer, Mass, and evening prayer.
*2- Candidacy usually comes around the third year of theology, that's when you can start wearing the Roman collar.
*3- Father McKnight is our Dean of Men.
*4- The Knights of Columbus give seminarians fantastic financial support.
*5- Due to a glitch, most of the clocks in our seminary have been stuck at 10:20 for the past few months.
*6- We have chicken a lot. Any PCJ parody song must make mention of this fact.
*7- I'm still cantoring. They tell me I'm getting better.
*8- Father Buffer usually sings the Salve Regina a half beat ahead of everyone else in an attempt to speed the chant along.
Reflections On Where I Am
Friday, November 19, 2004, 4:59 PM
Yesterday, another one of my DB's departed from the seminary. He said he perceived two callings, to become a priest and to teach, and foresaw that the diocesan priesthood was not aligned to fulfilling both. He plans to pursue an PhD and join some religious order with a educational mission. Once again, this came as a complete surprise to most of us. That makes four seminarian departures from our diocese in the last two semesters, with six of us remaining. I've done the straight-line best-fit projection and I figure I should be gone by mid-semester next year.
But seriously, this hemorrhage-like flow of vocations out of our diocese has caused me, as it would anyone, to consider whether I am likely to do the same someday. Upon reflection, this prospect seems very improbable. There is nowhere today I would rather be than where I am now; in seminary preparing to someday be a priest. I don't have dreams pulling on me besides the one which I am living now. If they threw me out (which is itself unlikely) I have no idea what I would do with myself. I suppose I would find some job, get married, and have a family, but this would seem to go against the providential path of my life which has brought me here and keeps me on this course. But we'll see what God wants - that is why seminarians always say, "I'll be ordained, God willing."
I recently finished a reflection on a Newman lecture on The Protestant View of the Catholic Church. You might find my perspective interesting.
The Importance of Being Called
Tuesday, November 16, 2004, 10:28 PM
Yesterday I was elected to the Student Senate with six other seminarians. I was honored that they would chose me. Hopefully we can do some good. The election exit polling shows that I led among women and Evangelical Christians. I'm not exactly sure how that happened, but numbers don't lie. Maybe I they liked my "moral values".
Saturday a camera crew was on campus attempting to interview seminarians. They said they had permission to be here, but our faculty public relations go-to guru knew nothing about it. It's hard to see how this could be an innocent mistake. Our PR guy says they could have been Michael Moore's people, who is said to be developing a new documentary on the Catholic Church (though I have not been able to confirm this through news outlets).
[PS: My sister sent me a comment on this--"I don't know what scares me more; Michael Moore making a movie condemning the Catholic Church or making a movie promoting it."]
Last week one of our beloved diocean brothers left the seminary after what was surely a long contemplated discernment. There's only one good reason to leave seminary, that is, "I don't believe I have a vocation." In doing God's will you can't go wrong.
Seeming Smart - For Dummies
Tuesday, November 9, 2004, 2:04 AM
Seem 20, 30, even 50 IQ points smarter to your family, friends, and co-workers in just four easy steps. My system is guaranteed, or your money back.
(Step 1) Realize how dumb you are. Recognizing this will help you to hold back from jumping to hasty conclusions and saying dumb things.
(Step 2) Listen more than you talk. One of the easiest and most effective ways to be interesting is to listen attentively. And, as Mark Twain said, �It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.�
(Step 3) Ask questions. This allows you to achieve Step 2 and, through learning, you work on making Step 1 less applicable.
(Step 4) Wear glasses. Nothing says, �Hey, I�m scholarly,� like glasses.
Pascal's Wager Revisited
Tuesday, November 9, 2004, 1:52 AM
Over the 40 hours retreat I had a thought I would like to share. Realize this is just a idea of mine and I'm not as smart as I look (see above). If you find it helpful, I'm pleased. If not, then discard it.
Blaise Pascal (1623-1662) was one of those general practice geniuses who were seemingly more common in centuries past. A mathematician who pioneered in probability theory, he was also a Christian philosopher. Once he blended his two fields of study in an argument that has come down to us as Pascal's Wager.
Quick and dirty, Pascal's Wager goes something like this: Either there a God or there is not. If God is real and we believe in Him, then there is an eternal reward for us. If God is real and we do not believe, then there awaits for us eternal misery. If God does not exist, then it is does not matter whether we have faith or not. Considering these scenarios everyone should choose faith because in believing there is nothing to lose and everything to gain. Non-belief, in contrast, can do us no good. Thus, everyone should believe in God.
Now this argument is maligned by many people for many reasons. For example, it implies that rational self-interest can win heaven just like a person wins a bet. Love seems to play no part, though St. Paul said, "[I]f I have all faith so as to move mountains but do not have love, I am nothing." There is also the question of whether belief or non-belief are really a wash if there should be no God. Finally, the argument assumes that there is only two options Christianity and Atheism. What if I add Lodi the deity to the equation? Lodi promises universal salvation for everyone and an eternal happiness surpassing that of the Christian God. Given this possibility, then how should one live?
I feel sorry for Pascal. I think he gets a bad rap. I imagine he was just offering this as a neat new approach. I doubt he would have considered this his greatest theological contribution. Yet, it occurs to me that Pascal's Wager deserves another look.
Pascal is attributed to have said (though I cannot verify it) that there exists a "God-shaped hole" in every person which only God can fill. By firsthand experience, I have found this to be true. I believe that only in loving relationship with the God of Christianity can we be fulfilled, truly happy, in this world and the next. The choice before us all is either for Jesus Christ, with the real prospect of fullness, or life without Him, which does not fulfill.
How can Lodi the deity be discarded from our consideration? Evidences for Christianity drawn from history, morality, philosophy, and the personal experiences of myself and others (living and dead) grant it the credibility as an option. My imaginary idol Lodi cannot claim this, and no other world religion seems to have so much to support it, agreeable to both the human mind and heart, as does Christianity. The person who really knows the Christian faith (as opposed to its caricature) and has encountered it truly lived (as opposed to superficial adherence) will yearn for the Source of this love and happiness, not as the result of calculation but out of sincere love.
"But," one might say, "I'm not Christian and I'm fulfilled." Really? Only you can answer that for yourself. "But what reason do I have to believe that Christianity is fulfilling?" Myself and others have lived the Christian faith's inherent gift and its objective evidence justifies your serious exploration. G.K. Chesterton said, "The Christian ideal has not been tried and found wanting; it has been found difficult and left untried."
"But I feel like it would be wrong to embrace Christianity while I'm not completely certain of its truth. Out of love for the truth, I can't act on faith." Instead of thinking of faith as an act against reason, think of it as acting on sound trust. We trust our friends even though we cannot be absolutely certain of their fidelity to us. Faith is acting on a reasonable trust. Christian faith is not unreasonable. Besides, you do not insist upon absolute certainty in every other aspect of your daily life. If you did, you could never even cross the street.
Finally, you said you are holding back out of love for the truth. In saying this you identify the truth with what is good, and I agree that you must pursue the good. But if God does not exist, then what grounding it there for goodness? Goodness becomes whatever pleases or displeases human beings. Now if what pleases you differs from what pleases us then who between us is right? Without God, goodness is lost in relativism and the justification for your withholding of faith (love of the truth) disappears.
"But I can't shake loose from my doubts." C.S. Lewis said that he was disturbed after becoming a Christian when occasionally God would seem unreal to him. But then he remembered how often there were times in his younger, atheist days when God's existence would seem all-together probable. God knows the sort of creatures we are and knows our faith will be small (smaller than a mustard seed), but acting on hope and love is good enough for God.
So the choice is much like Pascal put it: Choosing God, only the real prospect of supreme happiness and fulfillment, makes sense. Opting for that which cannot fulfill you does not.
Ouch
Saturday, November 6, 2004, 6:47 PM
2004 Mud Bowl
Theology 6
College 7 (OT)
After a five year theology dynasty, the college has regained the Mud Bowl trophy. The game was free from significant injuries (PS Correction: A deacon broke his nose.) I played my own game well at wide receiver, so I'm not devistated. We would have won if only I had used my head.
The Race is Run
Wednesday, November 3, 2004, 10:25 PM
Please pray for the good of Sen. John Kerry's soul. I put that intention up on the prayer board tonight. I know I have been more perfected through my humiliations than my successes. And pray for President Bush. Whether you like him or not, you'll agree that he needs it.
I like an unrelated quote I heard in today's homily (attributed to G.K. Chesterton though I cannot confirm it), "Life is only worth living once you've found something worth dying for."
Keeping Vigil
Tuesday, November 2, 2004, 10:44 PM
Did you hear that there is an election going on? But in all seriousness, I do not intend to spend the day glued in front of the television like I would have in my younger years. You see a habit like this among people in relation to sports. Instead of watching the game, why not simply wait for the final score to be definitively reported? Besides the adenaline rush of exciement, fans sense that watching and willing can help their team to win. While people might say that there is no emperical link between a person's willing at a distance and the outcome of an event, I bet you recognize this feeling in your own experience.
This tendency to actively focus our will for the fulfillment our personal desires is part of our human make-up; God has disposed His creatures to pray. The one who keeps an election vigil tonight, though his reason lacking faith tells him that his time could be much better spent on other things, is practicing so form of prayer. I also plan to keep a vigil for the election, but I intend to be in front of the tabernacle instead of the tv.
What's my prediction for the election? Here it is: There will be no concession speech tonight or tomorrow.
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