(Saturday night - Sunnydale)

" Which movie do you want to start off with guys?" Asked Willow holding up two movies she rented for the night of dinner and movies before they went on patrol.

" Fast and the Furious" Yelled out Xander.

" Vin Diesel is a total hottie!"

" Xander!" The girls yelled

" Buffy do you want to start off with The Fast and the Furious?" Asked Willow.

" Sure why not."

Xander grabs the bowl of popcorn and plops down on the couch in-between Buffy and Willow putting the bowl on his lap to share with the girls.

Soon the movie was over and the bowl was empty.

" Gawd, He is so hot!"

The girls just laughed and shook their heads at Xander.

" Well don't let Brad hear you talk like that he might get jealous." Said Willow patting Xander on the knee.

Xander hangs his head down and his knee starts to bounce nervously.

" I was only kidding Xander." Said Willow.

" I know and that's not it." " Its just Brad and I talked before he left for L.A. and he told me some stuff and I can't stop thinking about it." Said Xander letting out a sigh.

" Like what?" Asked Buffy turning her body to Xander to give him her full attention.

" First we got in to a fight about him leaving and why."

" His Brother?" Asked Willow.

" Ya and then we got in to because he still hasn't told his family about us and then he told me how his mom was killed." " And it wasn't until I was in the shower thinking about what he said that I realized that his mom was killed by a vampire."

" Wow!" Said Willow.

" How did it happen?" Asked Buffy.

Xander went into the details that Brad told him. When he finished they all set on the couch lost in thought.

" He never said anything before and he even went with us on patrol." Buffy said breaking the silence.

"I know and I feel like such an idiot." " How many times did I talk about Angel or even Spike for that matter and hell I even introduced him to Angel." " Damn I'm so stupid." Cried Xander.

" Xander he never said anything so stop taking it so hard." Said Willow rubbing Xander on the back.

" So you told him about Spike?" Asked Buffy giving Willow a look.

" Well ya he was kind of part of the Scooby gang there for awhile." Said Xander.

" And what was that look you gave Willow?" Asked Xander.

" What look?"

" You know the look and you better start explaining yourself Buffy Anne Summers right now!"

" Oh come on Xander we all know how you feel about Spike I mean it's so obvious when ever Angel calls or shows up here, the look YOU have on your face, you're on the edge of your seat just waiting for word on where Spike is and then the look of disappointment on YOUR face when it was another bust. Come on Xander we all know that you are in love with him and you have been like forever."

Xander jumping off the couch and starts to pace back and forth in front of the girls.

" No I don't Buffy; I'm so not in love with Spike." "I don't know what you are talking about." "Tell her Willow; tell her!"

"Xander you are in love with Spike." Said Willow.

" No I'm in love with Brad."

" We're not saying your not but we are saying that you ARE in love with SPIKE!" Cried out Buffy.

Xander putting his head in his hands and then looks at the girls. " Fine!"

" Fine I'm in love with Spike." " Now am I going to hear how he is a soulless vampire and that he will never love me in return."

" Well he is a soulless vampire and evil but I do think he did feel something for you maybe not love but something." Said Willow.

" So you two ok with this?"

" Well ya I mean, we know what he is and we know that when Spike loves someone it is eternal and when you love someone its whole heartedly." Said Willow getting up and giving Xander a hug.

" Xander we are ok with who ever you are in love with and even if it might be Brad or Spike we will always stand beside you on what ever you do." Buffy told Xander as she came up to wrap her arms around him too.

" I love you two more then anyone you know that right."

" Yes!" They both said at the same time.

" Now we better start the other movie and get on patrol before all the baddies go home and we miss kicking their ass." Xander said then kissing both girls on their foreheads.

" I do love Brad and I did tell him before he left but he never said anything back."

" Just give him time Xan."

" Willows right Xander, I think he does love you and he might not say it but he might feel it."

Xander walks over to the couch and throws his large framed body down. " Can I tell you guys something personal and very embarrassing?"

" Sure"

" Yes"

" I don't know how much you two know about male sex but.."

" Go on you can tell us." Said Buffy following Willow to the couch to sit by Xander.

" Well when two guys have sex..there is a top and bottom.I mean.um.giver and receiver.oh gawd.I mean." Cried Xander putting his head in Willows lap.

" I think we know what you mean Xan, go on."

" Well I'm the top and have never been the bottom; and I'm was wondering if maybe that was the reason Brad didn't say he loved me." " You know that it was a one sided relationship.I don't know I'm new to this and it wasn't until we had been together like a month before I even told him that I had never really been with a guy before and that he was the first."

" Xan I don't think that is why he didn't say anything." Said Willow running her hand through Xanders hair.

" So you aren't comfortable being bottom." Asked Buffy.

" Yes and no." " I don't think I can." " I have this deep feeling in side that is scared and that is some way I always thought Spike would be my first and I wanted him to be and them another part wants Brad to be." " I love Brad honest I do but I'm scared that if I give him my.um.virginity.then its like saying Spike will never come back and to move on..and I don't know if I'm ready for that and it's not fair for Brad to feel like this."

" But I do and then I think maybe I'm not ready to love Brad and maybe I don't; and if I do I'm I ready to let go of Spike." " And maybe and just maybe it's a stupid fantasy of mine that Spike will love me in return."

" We can't tell you who to love but Brad is here and Spike isn't and he might never come back." Said Buffy.

" Xan I don't know what to tell you but who ever, we are here for you."

" I know and I'm so lucky to have friends like you two." " And we better skip that movie and go patrol it's getting late."

The three best friends put on their coats and checked to see if they all had their weapons.

" Ready?"

"Yep"

" Yep"

The Scooby gang walked out to the street and down the road, arms linked and ready to fight the evil that lurked in the dark.

Sunday night Xander was sleeping deeply in the bedroom that Brad and him shared. Brad slipping into the bed quietly not to wake Xander just yet. He watched the man he loved sleep and with his eyes he traced every line every curve in his face to store it in his head for later memory knowing that the life Xander and him had built was going to soon come crashing down on him like a house of cards. He had to soon end this. The whole relationship was nothing but lies. All lies but the one thing he was going to tell him; that he loved him.

Leaning to place his lips on Xanders he gave his lover a small kiss and in that one kiss he gave his love. Moving his lips to caress Xanders cheek to his ear where he traced his tongue along his ear and whispered softly " Xan." " Baby, wake up."

Xander slowly woke up and looked in to Brad's eyes and stretched his body and brought his hands up in a fist to rub the sleep from his eyes.

" Hi, your home." " How was your trip?"

" Good, I missed you."

" I missed you too." Said Xander putting his hand on the back of Brad's neck and drawing him closer for a kiss. When their lips met he deepened the kiss and they let their tongues come out to play. Xander wrapped his arms around his lover and pulled him closer pulling him on top of him. He wrapped his legs around Brad and rubbed his hands up and down his bare back.

" Xan I love you." Said Brad looking down to Xander.

" I love you too baby."

" Xan please make love to me." " I want to feel you in me, I need you."

" Oh baby I want you I missed you so bad."

Xander pulling Brad down to him and ravaged his mouth savagely. Flipping him over on to his back and settling in between his legs rubbing his hands up and down his sides.

Xander moving his body back and forth dry fucking his lover and loving the moans Brad is crying out. Grinding his hips in rhyme to Brads letting their cocks slide together in a heated passion. Xander reaching to grab the bottle of lube that's on the night stand puts some in the palm of his hand and strokes his hard shaft making it wet and with still wet fingers he places them under Brads swollen sac to the hot pucker of flesh letting a single finger slowly slide in and loving the way his lover moaned under him.

" More" Cried Brad.

Xander letting another finger slide into the tight channel; pushing and then pulling them out faster and faster till he had a study rhythm pounding into the heated hole.

Pulling them out and faintly hearing his lover cry out in disappointment in the loss feeling of pleasure. Xander griping Brads legs opens them wide before he slides in between them and lays on him kissing his lips and running his tongue in side Brads mouth along his bottom lips giving it a nibble and sucking it in to his mouth. He whispers to his lover. "Open for me and let me in."

Brad drawing his legs up and holding on to them to let Xander slide his stiff cock in with a swift thrust into the hot depth of his hole. Xander rocking back and forth in a study motion of ecstasy; with each stroke he goes in deeper inch by inch till he can feel his balls slap against flesh and the rub of coarse hair hitting his own. Brad gasping and moaning under him is driving him closer to his own sweet orgasm. Xander reaching in between their bodies wraps his hand around Brad's hard shaft and pumping it in time with his rocking. Xander thrusting in deep and angling his cock to hit Brad's prostrate with every thrust making Brad scream when his hot liquid shot out and on to his stomach and chest. Xander feeling Brads ring of muscle tighten around him shots his seed deep in to his lovers depth. Xander kissing Brad with heated passion feeing his soften shaft fall out of his lover making them both shiver in the loss.

" Are you ok baby?" "I didn't hurt you did I?" Asked Xander still placing small kisses on his lovers face.

" No, It felt so good Xan; I love the way you feel while you are in side me."

" I love to be inside you baby, you are so tight, so hot, and I love how you just wrap around me like velvet and silk."

" Umm; I love how you make me fill full."

" Oh gawd baby I want to taste you; you make me so hard."Xander pressing his hard cock to Brad's leg letting his lover fill how his words affect him. Xander kisses his way down Brad's body stopping at a hardened nipple to take it in to his mouth and flicking his tongue across the stiff nub. Brad throws his head back moaning out loud. Xander trails his tongue along Brad's body back on course to his intended target. Stopping briefly at his naval dipping his wet tongue in to the shallow hole running his tongue around and around the hole. Brad bucking up trying to grind his hard erection to get some release. Xander griping his hands on both sides of Brad's hips pushing him back to the mattress and holding him still. Xander moves his body lower until he reaches his intended target sticking his wet tongue out and running it across the heart shaped head licking off the precum and bringing it in to his mouth.

" Yummm; you taste so good baby. I want to taste more." " Cum for me baby."

And with that Xander licks up the stiff shaft and wraps his mouth around his lover causing him to thrust up and cry out. Brad's head rolling side to side on the pillow a steady chant of sweet love words coming from his lips. Xander opens his throat and swallows Brads cock taking him in deep and to the hilt pulling back again to the tip till he plunges back down repeating the rhythm over and over. Xander fills the hard shaft pulsate in his mouth knowing his lover his close and needing something to push him over the edge of an orgasm reaches a finger back to the still wet hole of puckered flesh thrusts a finger in and curves it slightly till he hits his prostate letting his finger slide over it. Like a blot of lightening going throw Brad from his toes to the back his eye lids he screams and shoots his seed to the back of Xander's throat. Brad raises his head and watches Xander's Adam apple move up and down swallowing his hot liquid. Brad grabs his pillow from behind his head and covers his face as he screams in to it. Xander pulls off the softening cock and look at Brad.

" You ok lover?" Xander trying to act sweet and innocent.

" kainho" mumbles Brad in to his pillow.

" What?"

" That was fucking amazing!" Yelled Brad when he pulled off the pillow.

" So you liked?"

" Hell ya I liked." Cried out Brad reaching down and pulling Xander up his body placing a kiss on his still wet lips. Xander opens his mouth letting Brads tongue in and his eyes roll back in to his head and he moans in to this partner's hot mouth when he realizes that his lover tastes his own cum that is still on his tongue.

" Can you taste it baby?" " Can you taste you on my tongue?"

" Oh God, Yes!"

Xander sits up and places a leg on both sides of his lover sitting on his stomach but not letting his full weight bare down. Running his hands glide up and down Brads chest.

Brad taking Xanders hardened member in to his hand and starts to pump from the base to the tip going faster and faster. Xander throws his head back panting and moaning as Brad worked his cock. Leaning back he rests his hands on Brads thighs for leverage; he pistons back and forth in Brads hand reeling in the feel of his tight fist. With a sharp cry he shoots his warm seed over his lover's fist and covering Brads stomach. Laying down and curling around Brads side throwing a leg and arm around his partner in a secure embrace and kissing at his neck whispering love words as he falls into a dreamless sleep.

Hours later in the darkened room Brads pager goes off in a high pitch waking up the young lovers.

" What time is it?" Asks Xander.

" It's one in the morning." Answers Brad

" Do you have to go?"

" Ya"

" Mmm..ok"

" I'll call you later in the morning; get some sleep."

" Ok.love you"

" I love you Xan"

Brad gets up from their bed and takes a quick shower before he heads to the hospital.

Later that morning Xander is up and showered and sitting in front of the TV watching cartoons. His first class doesn't start till nine so he has plenty of time to lounge around.

The doorbell rings and Xander walks over to the door and opens it." Hi..is Brad here?"

Xander looking at the tall dark haired stranger in confusion." No..he is at the hospital."

" Oh.did he not tell you I was coming?"

" No"

" Well that is just like my little brother.by the way I'm Grant.Brad's older brother"

" Ya..well; he has mentioned you a time or two." Said Xander feeling a bit uncomfortable standing in front of Grant.

" Do you want to come in?"

" Sure but I thought Brad was here we were to go out to our sisters house.she lives outside of Sunnydale.well anyway.we were to go there for brunch..and a chance for..well everyone to meet you.you know you being Brads boyfriend and all."

" Brad told you and your sister about us?" Asked Xander not being able to hide shock.

" Well yes we were a bit surprised and all but we love Brad and who ever he loves..well we love too.so being the first to meet you..let me be the first to welcome you to the family." Replies Grant with a huge dazzling smile that showed too much teeth.

" Wow..I'm.like.cool.."

" Great so do you want to come out to the house for brunch we can call Brad form there and he can meet us."

" Ok"

" Good..you can ride with me so you and Brad can come home together."

" Sure"

Xander grabbing his wallet and keys locking the door behind him and following his lover's brother to his car. He wished he could shack the butterflies from his stomach and the feeling that something bad was going to happen but he just chalked it up to meeting his lovers family for the first time and he even had to smile knowing that Brad finally told his family about him having a boyfriend. Thinking to him self as he rode in the car.

*He loves me.oh ya.he really loves me.*

Grant drove in silence sitting behind the wheel with a smirk on his face and lost his his own thoughts.

* Oh ya.soon..it will all end..shit I have to admit..my little brother can pick them.damn that body..shit he even has the tightest ass on him..I would love to fuck that just once..well before I kill him.oh ya.shit he is gorgeous.such a pretty boy..uumm.I can picture him on his knees with my dick in his mouth.bent over..nice bare ass.shit I'm making my self hard just thinking about this fucking little shit.down dick soon we will have the boy but right now we don't want to scare him..we have to get him there first.them we fuck him.then we kill him.then we get William the Bloody*

*****
Part 11:

Grant parking his car in the drive in front of the two-story house turns off the engine and turns to Xander.

" Shall we head on in so you can meet my sister?" " She is just going to love you." Adds Grant with the sweetest smile.

" Sure I can't wait to meet her and your nephews."

" Let's go."

Grant walked to the house followed by Xander when they entered the house it was eerily quite. " Nancy!"

" Greg!"

Grant got no reply.

" They must be out side in the barn."

" Ok" Replied Xander

" They turned the old barn to their studio, they took up photography when they had the boys." " People hire them to do weddings and family pictures; they are quite good."

" I didn't know that."

" Oh yes they even made a dark room in the back of the barn."

" Cool"

Grant leading Xander out the back door to a small path that lead to a small red barn in the back of the house. Grant pushing open the door hollered for his sister once again. When they entered the barn they found it to be empty.

" Oh well they must have ran to town to the store I bet they will be right back; so while we wait can I get you a drink?"

" A soda would be fine" Answered Xander.

" Ok..a soda it is" " I will run back to the house and get you one .so in till then, look around.you just might find a picture or two of Brad." And with a huge grin Grant walked out.

Xander walking around the room looking at the pictures; some were in frames and some where just hanging on a clothes line waiting to dry he thought. There was pictures of people he didn't know but some he thought was of Grant and he even saw some of Brad.

Brad wearing a cap and gown and looking about 18. Xander thought to him self; high school graduation. Bet he didn't have a giant snake eating people at his graduation; thought Xander to himself. Moving down abit he found some old pictures of Brad around 8 or 9 and he looked so sweet standing with what looked like his mother and 3 other children. Grant walked in quietly.

" That is all of us kids before my mom was killed.my dad took it.it was the last one of her that was taken."

" Brad told me about your mom and I'm sorry."

Grant walking up to Xander and hands him a glass of soda and ice. Xander takes a drink and finding it bitter he lowers it." My mother was a very beautiful women and we all missed her very much.she was my..everything"

" Moms are like that." Replied Xander thinking about Joyce and even Willows mom who were always so nice to him unlike his own mom who never really cared and always thought he was a burden. Xander takes another drink feeling nervous and out of place.

" I called Brad while I was inside Xander and he said to tell you that he would be here in an hour and he was happy that you wanted to come to my sisters for brunch."

" Oh well that's good, I can't wait to meet Nancy and Greg." Said Xander taking a drink of his soda feeling uneasy all of a sudden feeling Grant watching him. He looks at Grant and gives him a small smile.

" I can see why Brad likes you.you are a beautiful boy." Grant says in a low seductive voice. Walking closer to Xander and running the back of his hand over the side of Xanders face trailing his fingers down. " Very beautiful"

Making Xander shiver and moves back out of Grants reach. " Thanks " Said Xander feeling very uncomfortable. Xander taking another drink to settle the butterflies in his stomach.

Grant coming closer to Xander and backing him in to a wooden cabinet trapping him there and Xander feeling like a fly in a spider web.

" You have a nice build for one so young.tight." Grant reaching for Xander and pulling him to his body hard. Xander stumbled into Grant feeling light headed and dizzy.

" Don't!" Mumbled Xander weakly trying to get his mind to focus. Xander was feeling so out of it that he couldn't seem to shake Grant off and he was even wondering if his arms were even moving and his legs felt like lead. He was wondering why he didn't fall to the floor and why was the room spinning?

" What did you do to me?" Mumbled Xander trying to form words.

" Oh that!" " I put a little bit of something in your drink.um.I think they call it.a date rape drug.its to help you relax" Replied Grant.

" What the fuck are you doing....where's Brad?" Xander asked with his eyes closed.

" Oh he wont be coming to our little party.you see.he couldn't stomach.revenge.and he thinks he is in love with you..but you see he cant be cuz you are.nothing..a toy.a pawn.in my game.you see.Brad was supposed to follow you..get close to you. get you to trust him.hell I told him to fuck you if he had to..I guess he did.and when it all came to the end of the game.he is to kill you..but he couldn't be here right now..on call at the hospital and all that..so he couldn't be here to put the bullet in your head but not to worry.luv..I'm here." Grant leans in and presses his lips hard to Xander and with a wet kiss he leans back out. " Damn you sure do taste real good luv"

Xander can't help the shiver that runs through his body hearing that word.

*Please someone..please come and rescue me.Buffy?.Willow?.shit not that word again..Spike..oh Spike.where are you.why don't you come home.to me..Spike.Spike.Spike.Spike.Spike*

Xander pulling his mind away from what Grant his telling him not realizing that he is saying Spikes name over and over again out loud. He can hear Grant through the fog of his mind he knows he is talking about his Spike but what he is saying isn't coming clear to his muddled mind. Letting his mind and body fall in to the black hole of nothingness. Separating from the reality and hurt that the man he thought he was in love with betrayed him and wants him dead.

Grant taking Xanders limp body and carries him to the house and places him in a bed; tying his hands and feet together and then sits in a chair by the bed with a hard glare on his face waiting for Xander to wake.

*****
Part 12:

Xander wakes slowly the light hurting his eyes and making his head pound. His tongue feels swollen and the taste in his mouth makes him want to gag. His stomach hurts and is cramping up in knots; his arms and legs are stiff..and thinking to himself .I feel like I just went 10 rounds with a demon.

Xander lifting his head up and trying to focus his eyes looks around and spots Grant sitting in a chair watching him with a hated glare on his face.

" Where am I?"... " Why?" asked Xander in a rough voice

" Want water"

Grant still just sits there looking at Xander.

" Please!"

Grant leans up till he is inches from Xander.

" You know I was going to let you go.well not really.but I was going to at least fuck you before I killed you.but.not now..not when you said his name."

" How can you.be friends.with that demon?"

" Who?"

" Oh Xander don't play dumb with me."

" William the Bloody!" Snarls Grant

" You were moaning and saying his name in your sleep.calling out for that fucking bastard.that killer"

" Well you know he is a demon vampire with out a soul." Said Xander.

" Fuck you!" screamed Grant giving Xander a sharp slap across his face.

" Ya well not like his sire right Xander.but it don't matter because you being his FRIEND.are going to pay..and look at that. an audience to watch while I torture you and then I'm going to send the tape to your friend Spike or William the Bloody or what ever he is calling himself.you know he was Spike when he killed my mom but you don't want to hear that.no you just want to believe that he is a good little vampire."

Xander looking at the video camera sitting on a tripod in the corner wondering if that tape will be the last time his friends will see him.wondering if they will even see it.wondering if he will ever see them again.

Grant getting up from the chair pushing it back to the wall and walking over to Xander staring down at him. Drawling his fist back and letting it swing connecting it to Xanders jaw. Xanders head rolls to the side from the forced blow, blood running from his mouth to his chin.

" Fuck you asshole!" Screams Xander knowing that if he is going to die he is going out in style; he wasn't going to let this bastard see him break. Grant hitting Xander again and again blow after blow each one landing hard to his face and chest.

Blood pouring out from the cuts on his face. The pain from each blow knocking him closer to the black nothingness he was in before.

" Hey Grant!" Whispered Xander throw swollen lips and a cut tongue.Grant hearing Xanders voice even though it was low and whispered.

" What you little bitch?"

" Tell Brad something for me..please"

"What?"

" Tell him that I never loved him and that I have always been and always will be in love with Spike...and while my dick was in his ass I was thinking.. of me making love to Spike." Said Xander with a small satisfying smile on his face.

" Bastard!" Growled Grant as he slammed another fist in to Xander's face, this one knocking him out.

*****
Part 13:

Xander woke up with the feeling that he has been through this before and something else oh ya now he remembers the pain is so intense it's making him queasy. Voices.he can hear voices but they feel so far away in the fog.is that Willow?..Buffy; he knows he can hear her but where is she?..why can't he see them?..where are they?..why is it so dark..fuck the pain.his head hurts so bad.come on Alexander wake up..wait that wasn't me who said that?..oh Giles.oh ya black nothingness.yahoo.happy snoopy dance..good bye pain.

Xander wakes up again and now the room is dark but with a small glow of soft light from a lamp from across the room. Looking around a bit was proving to be hard because his eyes couldn't open very far they both feel like they are swollen shut. A dark shadow moves across his vision very fast almost like a blur.

" Who's there?" Mumbled Xander in a low whisper.

" Lay back down Xander." " Buffy went to go get a nurse."

" Grant?"

" I know Xander but you will be ok.its going to be alright now."

" Water.please" Whispered Xander.

Willow went to the pitcher of water and grabbed a glass sitting by the bedside and poured Xander a glass of water bring it to his lips and helps hold his head so he can get a drink. "Feeling better?"

Xander nods his head and lies back in to the pillow. He must have dosed off again because the next time he opened his eyes the room is bright again and hurting his eyes. He looks around the room and notices flowers and balloons scattered around the room.

And laying about the room is the bodies of his friends. Willow is curled up in a chair by the window looking so young and the sun is making her hair look like its on fire thought Xander. And spooned on the couch was Giles and Buffy they look so peaceful and so much in love the way there are both hanging on tight almost afraid to let each other go. Or maybe if Giles did let go Buffy would fall to the floor thought Xander with a small laugh to him self.how could they both fit on that small couch.

Xander laid in bed trying to recall every little bit of details that had landed him in the hospital and finally like a ton of bricks it hit him right to his heart...Brad betrayed him. Xander rolling to his side curled up in to a tight ball, cried and screamed in to his pillow.

Willow waking up to Xanders cries ran to the bed and not caring about the tubes running from Xander climbs in the bed and wraps her arms and her body around her child hood friend comforting him and whispering soothing words.

" Willow?"

" Yes honey"

" Brad?"

" He is the one that found you in time."

" How?" " Why didn't he finish me off?" Asked Xander.

" He said he showed up at the house to water his sister's plants while her and her family are in Florida on vacation and he noticed Grants car and when he walked into the house he heard your voice and when he got upstairs he found you bound and tied to the bed and Grant standing over you. He tackled Grant and they fought a bit, and he managed to knock him out with an alarm clock by the bed, and then he was able to call the police and an ambulance." Replied Willow. "And he told the police everything; about Grants plot for revenge and how he was blackmailed into getting closer to you so he can learn everything about you and your friends. He never told them that Spike was a vampire he just said that Grant was convinced that he killed their mom."

" Where is Brad now?" Sadly asked Xander.

" Not sure but I have to tell you Xan; he moved out of your apartment and we haven't seen him since we were down at the police station giving our statements two days ago."

" How long have I been here?" Asked Xander

" Four days" Answered Willow.

" Wow that long."

" Hey Xan welcome back to the land of the living" Said Buffy as her and Giles walked to the bed. Xander didn't even hear them get up but he was sure glad to see them even if they did look like shit.

" You two look like hell" Laughed Xander

" Ya well we haven't gotten much sleep since you came in, so lay off honey I know I look like shit." Said Buffy with hands on her hips.

" Don't really care how you look Buffy I'm just glad to see you and Giles and you too Willow..I thought I was dead." Xander said with fresh tears falling down his face.

" They both wanted me dead to get back at Spike for something that happened years ago.way before I even knew him."

" And Brad" Xander choking on the word and tears.

" Oh god it hurts..I loved him.he was my lover and friend and he betrayed me..how could he do that?.I thought he loved me...why?" Sobbed Xander with a broken heart.

Willow held her childhood friend tighter as he cried. Some time later after the last of his tears ran dry and he was emotionally wore out, Xander was propped up on his pillows while Willow feed him jello and broth. " Yuck hospital food!" Whined Xander.

" But I could get used to being feed by a cute girl."

" Ya well don't get used to it cause the doctor said you are going to be getting out of here soon but they just want to take some cat-scans of your head you have a slight concussion and they want to make sure every thing is doing fine in that head of yours." Said Buffy.

" When are they going to do the test?" Asked Xander.

" In the morning and then if everything is ok you can go home." Said Giles.

" Good cuz have I told you guys lately how much I hate hospitals."

" Yes!" All his friends said in unison.

" Good, just as you all know." Laughed Xander.

A couple days later Xander came home from the hospital to an empty apartment and an empty heart. It took months to heal his heart and it will take even longer to heal from the nightmares he had every time he closed his eyes to sleep. Images of Grant with that cruel smile standing over him and some times its Brad telling him in his sleep that he never loved him and he was going to kill him and just as Brad raises a gun to his head and he wakes up sweating and tears running down his face; once or twice he woke up to his screams echoing through his empty bedroom.

*****
Part 14:

Xander sat on the porch steps looking down at the book in his lap letting the tears run freely down his face. He turns to the side and picks up the envelope that came with the book. He opens it up and pulls out the letter that lay inside. Xander unfolded it and begun to read the short letter.

Xander,
I'm so sorry! I know after all that my brother did and even after
all I did to you; you might not want to hear my apologies but I
am sorry for every thing. I did love you and never meant to hurt
you. When I went to L.A. that weekend I confronted Grant and
I told him how wrong it was to hurt you. It was never about you.
I hope you understand that. He told me that you were out of his
plot for revenge and I never believed him but I didn't think he
would kidnap you and hurt you. I'm so sorry. I know we can
never be lovers again; hell you might not even want to be my
friend but I have something for you and I hope you come to L.A
so I can give it to you. No Tricks!! Just me showing you how
sorry I am. Next Saturday I will be having a book signing at a
bookstore and I want you to come. I booked you a hotel room
for the weekend. Please come I really need to see you.

Love you always,
Brad

Xander just sat there dumbfounded. How could he just so casually write me after all this time hell it's been at least a couple years and now he wants to see me. I've moved on got my degree. Shit I'm a teacher now! And he just writes me a letter and not to mention this stupid book and I'm supposed to drop my life and come running to L.A. Well fuck him!

" Xander!"

Xander turns around when he hears his name. Coming out the front door is Willow and Buffy; coming to check on their friend.

" Are you ok?"

" Ya!"

The girls set down on either side of Xander and they wrap their arms around him. Xander feeling the comfort and love from his friends starts to tell them about the book and letter.

" The book is titled " THE VAMPIRE SLAYER" and what I've gathered from the summary on the back its about you Buffy and all of us. You know the hellmouth and Sunnydale. How we fight vampires and demons."

" Oh shit Xander do you know what this means?" Cried Buffy standing up and begins to pace.

" Ya people will start to pour in to Sunnydale on their vacations to take tours of this hellhole."

" Oh goddess how do we stop this?" Asked Willow.

" Our cover is seriously blown everyone will know; every demon will come running to kill us." Yelled Buffy.

" What are you going to do Xander? Are you going to L.A.? You need to go and ask Brad not to do this to us?" Said Willow.

" Tell him that this book will put us in danger."

" Willow I think it is to late for that; the book is already in book stores; its only time before people start to show up."

" At the bottom of the letter is the address of the book store and the time of the book signing it also has which hotel I will be staying at; I'm going to go to L.A. and talk to Brad." Said Xander.

" And when I see him I'm going to knock him on his ass; he hurt me once that I can handle, I can almost forgive but I will be damned if I will let him hurt me again."

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