Backseat Boys, Backroad Boys...?!?!
Source: Orange County, CA news paper, The Register
Today we're going to take a short break from shoveling head-high mounds of unclaimed chad to discuss a hot new band I just discovered.
They're called the Backseat Boys, and they're AWESOME!
Curiously, I'd never heard of them until their latest release, "Black & Blue," showed up in stores this week.
"Who are these Backseat Boys?" I inquired of a teen-aged girl as she purchased the new CD at Best Buy.
She looked at me as if I were a trough of lukewarm mule slobber.
"You mean the BackSTREET Boys?"she asked. "Yeah, that's them."
"They're actually not new, "she explained. "They've been around three or four years. I think they sing pretty well."
I subsequently learned that the Blacksmith Boys are part of a wave of so-called "boy-bands" whose numbers include 98.6 Degrees, We Stynk and the Jackson Five. Interestingly, most boy-bands are made up exclusively of middle-aged women.
The Backroads Boys are generally thought to be the best of the bunch, which is a little like saying Mir is the best Soviet-built space station.
They're so hot I was in danger of being left empty-handed. So I grabbed a copy of "Black & Blue" and got into the checkout line. Another teen-aged girl, Erin, was in front of me, also purchasing "Black & Blue." She assured me that Brian was the cutest of the Backbeat Boys.
"What do you think of Led Zeppelin?" I asked, trying to keep the hip, teen-style conversation flowing. She looked confused and scared.
The drive home took forever. It was hard to imagine that in a few short minutes, I'd be jamming to "Black & Blue" just like all the other kids.
"Hi, Honey," I announced bursting through the front door. "I've got the new Backlot Boys CD!"
I could tell by the way Leigh scooped up the baby and fled to the other end of the house that she was as excited by my new purchase as I was.
I tore open the CD box and frantically grabbed the liner notes. My heart was pounding. Each Backmeat Boy (there are five) had written a personalized acknowledgement, thanking their families, fans, each other and anyone else they could think of. Some of the liner notes were adorably religious. A.J., for example, thanked the "Heavenly and Gracious Father" and "our security team." Brian asked that the Lord protect "those who play a big part in managing... our careers."
It gave me goosebumps, although I was stunned to see that Brian- the supposedly "cute" one- bears an uncanny resemblance to Don Knotts.
Finally, it was time to listen to the "music." It was great.
My fave song was "Shape of My Heart," which I'm guessing is roughly the shape of pot roast the day after my Thanksgiving gorge-a-thon. The lyrics went like this: "I've been looking back on things I've done
I was trying to be someone and kept you in the dark
Now, let me show you the shape of my heart."
As I listened, I realized it's a good thing I don't manage the Back Hoe Boys because I probably would have made them change the words to:
" It's dark and faintly green.
Now, let me show you the shape of my spleen."
I hear Brian's spleen is really cute.
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