Stop it!�

Kylenn tried her best to control her small group of initiates, but it was proving exceedingly difficult as time passed by with all the swiftness of a speeding slug. The word games had long been exhausted, as had everyone�s vocal cords. The darker it became, the more tired the adults got. Conversely, the children were wide-awake and bouncing around. Not that long ago they had been terrified, not to mention nearly devoured during a rather too close encounter of the reptilian kind, but now it was seemingly forgotten in the excitement of being allowed out after dark.

�I warned you before,� Kylenn reiterated, �No swinging about on the branches. It�s dangerous.�

A small chorus of grumbles echoed in reply. She sighed in irritation. At the start of the day she would have been most people�s favorite padawan. A soft touch. Easily persuaded. Now, she had turned into a hard-brow ogre. So much for asserting ones self.

Jay Abran was still asleep, snoring lightly. That had kept the initiates amused for the best part of ten minutes. Master Jinn was not asleep, but he had his arm round Jemmiah�s shoulder whilst he tried to help work on healing her ribs. What a cute couple they made, Kylenn laughed to herself. If only Obi-Wan could see her curled up in his master�s lap! Abran could roll his eyes and jump to all the conclusions he wanted, but Kylenn refused to read anything into it. Except that they looked a heck of a lot more friendly than they used to be�

�Will you cut that out!� She hissed at the Wookie Zibacca. He looked shamefaced. �I can�t get comfortable.� He complained.

�I thought Wookies were used to trees.� Kylenn responded.

�You call this a tree?� Zibacca snuffled miserably. �It�s a stunted weed compared to where I come from. My bottom keeps hanging over the branch!�

�Them you�d best stop jiggling around, hadn�t you?�

Qui-Gon opened his eyes. He�d been listening to the strained conversation whilst concentrating on the healing, and decided that there were some frayed nerves that needed mending, too.

�Why don�t we try a word association game?� He offered.

�Yeah!� Chorused the little ones, trying to arrange themselves so that they could best see and hear to take part.

�Right, then.� Jinn said. �I�ll start first, shall I?�

He looked about him. �Tree.�

�Kashyyyk.� Answered the Wookie, whose turn it was. He then promptly burst into tears of homesickness.

�Good call, Master Jinn.� Jemmiah muttered, eyes still closed.

�I�ll start.� Kylenn said hurriedly. �Er�Grass.�

�Green.� Replied one of the human initiates.

�Yoda.� Shouted the ET.

�Stick.� Drawled Jemmiah.

�Wood.� Qui-Gon smiled.

�Tree.� Kylenn repeated.

�Kashyyyk.� Bawled the Wookie, in tears of hysteria.

Qui-Gon blew out a long breath.

�Let�s try another, shall we? How about�water.�

�Rain.� Jemmiah said.

�Storm.� Kylenn smiled.

�Thunder.� The Wookie snuffled.

�Lightening.� The ET said.

�Tree-strike.� Replied Jemmiah under her breath, a wicked tone to her voice. She didn�t have to open her eyes to know that Master Jinn was regarding her with disapproval.

�Sorry, what was that?� Qui-Gon�s voice had taken on a slight edge.

�I said electricity.�

�That�s what I thought you said.� Qui-Gon nodded.

�It�s your turn Kylenn.�

�Oh. Er..Steam.�

�Cloud.�

�Snow.�

�Hoth.�

�Wampa.�

�Eaten-alive.� Jemmiah smiled.

There was an uncomfortable pause.

�Someone�s in a morbid mood tonight.� Qui-Gon remarked.

�It�s the company I keep.� She groaned, as a stab of pain went down her ribs.

�Try and keep still.� He instructed her.

�Let�s start that one again. Water.�

�Droplet.�

�River.�

�Flood.�

�Torrent.�

�Monsoon.�

One of the initiates who had been listening put his hand up.

�Yes?�

�I need to go to the fresher.�

�That�s with all your talk of water.� Snickered Jemmiah.

�Look, try and join in with our game. It�ll help take your mind off things.�

�You hope.� Jemmiah said.

�Where were we?�

�Monsoon.� Qui-Gon said.

�Er... Waterfall.� Kylenn stumbled.

�Drowning.� Jemmiah replied.

The initiates were looking really uncomfortable. Qui-Gon tapped her gently on the arm. �Behave.� �Start again.� Kylenn said, determined to finish the thread. �Water.�

�Food!� Yelled the Wookie.

They all sighed in unison. They were starving.

�Candyfloss.� The ET smacked its lips.

�Sugar.�

�Cakes.�

�Buns.�

�Biscuits.�

�Treacle.�

�Toffo.�

�Ginger Sweets.�

The horrified look upon Jemmiah�s face continued to grow with every answer provided as she felt her stomach lurch again. As quickly as her cracked ribs would allow, she leaned right out of the tree and threw up, not caring if the cannoid-initiates of Abran�s were underneath at the time.

Groans of the disgusted variety punctuated the air.

�It�s not my fault!� Jemmiah gasped after a while.

�How many times have I heard that today?� Qui-Gon remarked.

She looked at him. �Let�s make a pact. I won�t mention trees, drowning or being eaten if you don�t mention food.�

�Deal.� Smiled Qui-Gon, stroking her long hair.

Kylenn noticed that, all right! Perhaps Jay was right. Maybe there is something going on here�

"I think we should all get some sleep, if we can.� Qui-Gon said. �We can see what can be done in the morning.�

�It won�t matter what time of day it is to him.� Kylenn pointed at the snoring Jay Abran. �Listen to him.�

�Yeah,� Jemmiah nodded slowly, wiping her mouth. �It sounds like someone sawing through a tree.�

The Wookie burst into tears again.

�Oh, Sith.� She moaned, looking up at Qui-Gon. She tried a weak smile. �Sorry.�

*******

Hours didn�t fly past. Minutes loitered with intent, and then loitered some more. Father time was dragging his heals, clearly intent on prolonging the ordeal for his own sick entertainment.

I wish I were back home in the temple, thought Kylenn somewhat morosely. A proper bed to sleep in. A chance to change out of these robes and shower. A drink of warm milk with Alderaanian Cinnamon sprinkled on the top. My master will be beside herself with worry! How on Coruscant do I explain this away?

I wish I knew how to deal with this little �situation� between my padawan and Jemmiah, thought Qui-Gon bleakly. Part of me is dreading the disruption this is going to bring to all our lives. Bringing up a child is not a responsibility to be taken likely. The personal sacrifices are tremendous; in fact she probably doesn�t even appreciate the hard work and long term commitment required in looking after another being. Has she ever committed herself to anything long term? Does she even LIKE children? What sort of mother will she make? More to the point, what sort of father is my padawan going to make?

Sith! What sort of stand in grandfather am I going to make?

I wish this tree were bigger, whined the Wookie to himself.

I wish Obi-Wan were here so that we could discuss his irresponsibility, Qui-Gon bit his lip.

Jemmiah opened an eye and stared at Jay Abran. I wish someone would get him castrated, she thought.

Abran had unfortunately woken up some twenty minutes ago. The sleep that Master Jinn had induced may very well have been a little on the strong side from his point of view, but for Jemmiah the peace and quiet had been a gift from the Gods. She didn�t like the way he kept looking at her and smiling that insufferably cheeky smile. The one that meant he was up to no good, or at the least planning to be up to no good.

I wish I knew what he was planning, she frowned. If he so much as pinches my rear again�

I wonder if the child will have his green-blue eyes or her copper ones, Qui-Gon mused.

I think I�m going to be sick again, Jemmiah thought queasily.

It�s bound to inherit the reddish brown hair, seeing they both have that coloring, Qui-Gon made his mind up.

I wish that Wookie wouldn�t shuffle about so much, Kylenn grimaced. He�s bending and shaking the tree about something terrible.

Actually, it might not be so bad. I think I could get used to being a grandfather, Qui-Gon smiled.

I wish I wasn�t so hungry, the ET and his companions sighed collectively.

From out of the silence there came a sudden snap! Followed by the merest hint of a rustle of a plasti-packet. All ears became instantly alert.

�Master Jinn, I�m beginning to hear things.� Whimpered Zibacca the Wookie.

�Me too,� Kylenn groaned. �I thought I heard the sound of someone opening a packet of chips.�

Despite all efforts to tell his stomach to obey, Qui-Gon felt his own body telling himself he needed to eat, rather more loudly than he thought was becoming the dignity of a Jedi Master. �That happens sometimes when people are hungry.� He responded. �But I�m afraid in our case it�s definitely wishful thinking. I know for a fact that if anyone here actually HAD any food, they would do the decent thing and share it out. Wouldn�t they?�

�Yes, Master.� Came back several reluctant voices at once.

�Good.� Qui-Gon nodded his approval. �I�m glad to see you�re all so fair. Honesty is a very important part of the Jedi code. Without it we would�actually, I think I can smell chips, too!�

�Uuurghh!� Jemmiah squeezed her eyes shut even tighter. �I thought we had a deal. You said we would NOT mention food.�

�Sorry.� Qui-Gon apologized. �We are letting our imagination run away with us.�

There was complete quiet for some half a minute.

�I CAN smell chips.� Qui-Gon insisted, peering into the dark to ascertain whom the guilty party was.

�Master Jinn, PLEASE!� Jemmiah placed a hand over one ear.

�Own up.� Qui-Gon said, trying to stretch out with the force to help locate the culprit.

�Come on. I�m waiting.�

Nobody answered.

�I�m going to count to ten, and then I expect that bag of chips to be in my hands.�

�Do you really want me to be sick all over you?� Jemmiah countered.

Ten seconds came and went.

�I�m STILL waiting.� Qui-Gon added, hand outstretched. He was beginning to feel rather foolish. What if I�m imagining things, he wondered? �I�m going to count to ten again, and this time I really DO want to see that packet of chips��

�Takkini chips.� Sighed Kylenn.

��Takkini chips,� Qui-Gon nodded, �in my hands or else��

�You�ll count to ten again?� Jemmiah wondered. �That�ll really scare them, Master Jinn.�

She carefully sat up straight, and an ominous cracking sound came from the branch beneath her. She froze, hardly daring to breathe.

Qui-Gon clasped a reassuring hand on her arm. �It could be that this branch is not entirely stable!� He joked.

�NOT ENTIRELY STABLE?� Jemmiah repeated. �Thank you for pointing that out to me. If the branch breaks and I split my head open, you�ll be sure to tell me, won�t you?�

Well, at least the kids aren�t wiggling about as much, Kylenn thought with a small amount of satisfaction. The way that Wookie was carrying on you�d think he�d have the whole tree on its side before very much longer�

Crunch.

�Someone HAS got chips!� Kylenn screamed. �I heard them being munched!�

�I want one!�

�Me too!�

�And me!�

�And so do I.� Qui-Gon agreed. �Give, please.�

Nobody moved.

�It�s Abran.� Jemmiah replied. �He�s got at least three packets hidden in his robes.�

He looked shocked. �How did you know?�

�I know what a total Gamorrean you are when it comes to edible comestibles. I�ve not forgotten what you did at my party with that trifle!� She blanched at the memory.

�I�ve not forgotten what you did with the double-chocolate iced meringues.� He replied, grinning. He could almost feel the heat radiating from her face.

�I think we�re getting away from the point.� Qui-Gon cut in, trying to gloss over Jemmiah�s somewhat liberal regard for moral standards. �I want you to share those out. NOW.�

Abran snorted in annoyance, reaching into his robes for the packets of Takkini chips had stashed away on his person. Damn! How did she know? Launching them into the air with the force, he tossed them at her rather than to her. She glared, ducking at the last moment.

�Cut that out this instant!� Qui-Gon was getting annoyed.

�He�s still got another packet on him.� Jemmiah muttered bad-temperdly.

Sith! How DID she know?

�I was keeping that for��

�Yourself.� Jemmiah nodded. �We know what you�re like.�

��Tomorrow!� Abran hissed. �Unless you don�t want something to eat tomorrow.�

�I don�t care if I never eat anything ever again.� Jemmiah felt her stomach twinge. �Hand them over.�

�No!�

�You are a selfish pile of B�salli droppings.� Jemmy groused scrambling over to him, one arm protectively over her ribs. �I said hand them over.�

He just smiled at her. �Make me.�

He caught the angry gleam in her eyes and held the bag out, dangling it towards his right, as far along the branch as he could reach. Damaged ribs or not, she made a determined lunge. Abran lifted them away from her grasp at the last moment�

And then the branch snapped from underneath them.

*******

�Can�t we stop him from doing that?�

Bai tried to recall Mace Windu, THE Mace Windu, respected Jedi Master and Council member that everyone knew and admired. Then he tried to reconcile that memory with the image in front of his eyes, and found that he couldn�t.

As he was speaking, Master Windu was running back and forth, arms bent into stumpy wings that he flapped vigorously up and down, making the most disturbing duck noises it had ever been Bai�s misfortune to witness. To add to the embarrassment, he had placed an enormous spray of fern in his buttock cleavage to represent a tail�

�Master Windu��

�QUACK!�

�Please say something other than quack.�

�QUACK?�

�That�s not helping me.�

�Quack-Quack?�

�No. It�s not.�

Pause.

�It�s getting really dark. We need to find Master Jinn!�

�Quack-Quack-Quack-Quack-Qqqqqquack!�

�Sorry. I didn�t catch that.� Dylain the keeper put a hand up against his ear.

�He says he needs to preen his feathers.� Bai translated.

�Oh.�

�Quack-Quack�Quack-Quack-Quack.� Windu added, trying to fan out his fern tail. �Quack.�

�This is getting ridiculous.�

Mace stopped flapping his arms and stared at Bai. �QUACK!�

�Oh, shut your beak!�

Suddenly, Windu darted towards a large patch of leaves, settling himself down with meticulous care. The caltrop-shaped device was still embedded in his rear.

�Where does he think he�s going?� Bai was almost ready to tear out his spiky hair.

�I think he wants to lay an egg.� Dylain replied.

�Quack!� said Windu.

�Hope it�s a square one.� Muttered Bai.

*******

By some miracle, neither Jemmiah nor Jay Abran had fallen right to the ground.

The lowest branches had caught both of them on the way down, breaking both their falls to a certain extent. Abran had put out his arms to help slow him down, and had been impaled in the hand for his trouble by a sharp twig. Jemmiah had gotten herself jammed between a sharp fork in a branch, but close enough to see the little Sith hounds of Abran�s suddenly come back to wakeful bloodlust in a matter of moments. They already had her boots, how much more did they want?

She didn�t want to admit it, but she was scared. Heights were never her thing. More than she hated heights, she hated the idea of falling from them. When the branch had creaked under the combined weight of herself and Master Jinn, she had become momentarily petrified with fear. This time, she didn�t dare move. Her ribs felt as if they were on fire.

�Owwww!� Abran yelped as he examined his injury. �Gods, I�m bleeding!�

�Quit bleating, will ya.� Jemmy replied weakly.

�But my hand has a hole in it!�

�It�ll match the one in your head, then.� She muttered.

�I could be scarred for life!�

�If you don�t shut up, I�ll do it personally!�

�Keep still, both of you.� Master Jinn shouted from above.

�He says the most idiotic things at times.� Jemmiah groaned. �What does he think we�re going to do, play a game of Bolo ball?�

�There�s a big piece of wood the size of Master Yoda�s cane sticking out of my hand!� gibbered Abran.

�You men. Always like to over-estimate the size of things.� Jemmiah retorted, craning her neck to see. �Show me.�

He held his hand out, supported by its trembling counterpart.

�That�s nothing more than a spail.� She sniffed dismissively.

�What sort of woodwork classes did you go to?� Abran wailed. �My hand�s hanging off!�

Below, the initiates that were once in Jay Abran�s charge circled the tree once more. Odd, thought Jemmiah, that the only time they had calmed down was when they were playing those silly word games. It was almost as if they had been listening�

She had an idea.

�Hey, doggies!� She shouted down to the initiates.

�GGGGGRRRRRRRRRRR!�

�We�re going to play a little game. Would you like that, huh?�

�GGGRRR.�

�How about this. Master Yoda says, �Play dead.��

To the astonishment of everybody in the tree, each one of the initiates joined in Jemmiah�s game. Master Yoda Says was a well-known game amongst the initiates in the cr�che. As long as Master Yoda gave the command, his order was to be carried out. If, however, Master Yoda did not give the order, the command was to be ignored. Anyone who didn�t ignore it was disqualified from the game.

These little darlings played the game very well, Jemmiah observed, as she called out instruction after instruction.

�Master Yoda says beg.�

The five initiates sat on their haunches and begged. Qui-Gon watched, open-mouthed. He began to climb down from the tree, and indicated that the others should do the same.

�Master Yoda says, SIT!� Commanded Jemmiah sternly.

Again, the children obeyed.

Qui-Gon was just about prepared to take back anything he�d said about Jemmiah that might have been less than complementary. It became obvious to him that she knew instinctively how the children�s minds worked. Perhaps his doubts about her parental instincts would prove to be misjudged.

�Jump up!� Jemmiah instructed. The children remained as they were.

�Well done,� Kylenn said, �If I had to spend another moment in that tree I d� have gone right round the twist.�

�What about my hand?� Moaned Abran, lowering himself down.

�I think you�ll live.� Qui-Gon replied. �Until An-Paj gets his hands on you, that is.�

�Fantastic.� Mumbled Abran.

He looked down at the mutilated flesh. �I�ll never play the Gurlia Harp again.� He said mournfully.

�You don�t even play it now.� Kylenn smiled, helping the Wookie down from the tree.

�But I might have in the future.� Abran sighed. �Do, or do not. There is no try. Gotta have faith.� He winced as his hand continued to bleed. �Keep dreaming. That�s what Master Yoda says; keep on chasing��

He backed off in confusion as five sets of eyes lit up demonically.

�No, wait guys. I didn�t mean that. Back off, will yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa?�

He fell beneath an onslaught of biting and force-wielding scratches and pinching, as five tiny bodies launched themselves at the helpless padawan.

�Get off! Do you hear me? GET OFF!�

Jemmiah shrugged, looking at Qui-Gon.

�He never said, �Master Yoda says.�� She shrugged.