Mom: Stop making faces at that monkey.
Kid: He started it!
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Where is the ocean deepest?
At the bottom.
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First guy: Hey! Who do you think your'e pushing around?
Second guy: How many guesses do I get?
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A customer gets into a taxi and asks: Hey can you take a joke?
The Taxi driver replies: Yes Sir. Where would you like to go?
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Grandmother: How do you like school Sally?
Sally: Closed!
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A kid says to a Clerk at the store: Do you sell Birdseed?
Clerk: Only when they're accompanied by their owners.
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What's that Mosquito doing on your arm?
Looks like it's Skindiving
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Two kids at a baseball game.
First kid: Why do you call the center fielder Spider?
Second kid: Because he catches flies!
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When are you most likely to have a nightmare?
When you're asleep!
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