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MONTH TEN

Hey Andrea,
Here's the latest with my growing out process. I used the Paul Mitchell over the weekend...twisted it up and thought it was looking rather cute. I then went upstate for Easter dinner where a 12 year old girl instantly sized me up and said 'ohhhh! Your hair is so nappy!' (this was NOT a compliment!) Now, there's all types of ways to respond to this other than the fact that at age 12 she has already internalized a lot of self hatred. But BESIDES THAT, it's about her extremely nappy edges with all of this bone straight hair sticking up in the most incredibly stiff pony tail that she seem to think was acceptable. So, now that I've capped on a little girl (she STILL managed to shatter my ego a bit!), I'm STILL committed although I constantly run into women especially who do not like nappy hair on themselves nor are willing to accept it on any one else. Unbelievable!
This little girl wanted to know if I was going to grow dread locs, and I told her the verdict was out on that....She says they are ugly. What I KNOW is ugly is dead hair that has been beaten into submission so that it no longer has any life left in it, but is so straight and greasy that it's stiff as a board. I saw a lot of this type of hair this weekend.
Hope your hair is hanging in there! I will keep you posted.

As far as coming up with the right combination of products that work for you, this is hard. I have a feeling that you just have to keep it really moisturized (not GREASY!) and wash it regularly with a mild shampoo that's not too drying. I actually like experimenting with it though. It's kind of fun. I still havent gotten the confidence to wear without a headband though. I have to get past this. Will send more later.

What happened when you went home? what kinda reactions did you get?

Well, I got rather mixed reactions to my hair, but for the most part they were all very positive. This woman named Angie was real interested in whether or not I was heading towards locs....I told her it was a possibility but not real soon yet. My sisters had suggestions regarding different products to use but the problem is they are still recommending these after seeing their affects on relaxed hair.

It seems as if locs is the ultimate for natural hair. the final destination. if i do loc will that mean my quest is over or is it simply the beginning?

I can't remember how long ago I performed that massive haircut, but I took another inch off last night. I think I'm STILL seeing some stray areas where there continues to be relaxer in this, especially at the top. I may get brave and cut a bit more next week, but this has to settle in on me first. These ends apparently needed to come off too, because there was much less tangling when I untwisted it this morning. I'm thinking that I will be done with this ordeal by mid summer. I had a buddy over last night who has always had issues with her hair. She has the back completely buzzed off but is still getting relaxers. Her problem is that she has extremely nappy hair and tends to want it bone straight. I think because of it's texture, each beautician she goes to uses a relaxer that is too harsh for her hair.
People have to realize that our hair is extremely fragile once you've forced it to go against it's natural pattern. Anyway, she surprised me when she said that she was considering going to locs. She just didn't seem like the type who would find them attractive, but I think locs are gaining a wider acceptance.

I'm personally looking forward to getting enough hair on my head to have a pony tail....it is possible, right? I mean, I know it will grow, but there is no way that it will all reach a pony tail at the moment. I kind of took care of that. So all those people that knew me and were tired of the ponytail.....your wish has been granted!

What new and exciting thing have you done with yours lately? Keep me posted.

you are really and truly brave!! when i first starting hacking away at my half dead relaxed ends it was very painful. i felt like samson. then after a while i just wanted it gone. i started cutting away in september '99 and did the final cut around jan. it was such a wonderful feeling. i felt totally free.

you'll definitely get your ponytail and sooner that you know. each time i take out my twists i can't believe how much it grew. also, my hair seems to grow alot faster in the summer, most people's probably do too, that glorious sunshine i guess (which can also be drying on the hair, can't win sometimes!!)

Mine is braided at the moment in some big ole fat braids. can wait for memorial weekend, i'm gonna 'treat' myself and go to the hairdresser to get it tail comb twisted. i can do the two stranded twists myself but i'll need practice for the tail comb twists. i think getting the partings right would be my biggest problem. i'll have to watch em real close and ask a bunch of questions to find out the 'trick'. some people say 'don't use gel, it's too drying on the hair'. others say 'don't use beeswax, it's too heavy on the hair'!!. but when i twist mine up i use a beeswax that i absolutely love called or made by 'Kuza', so what to do? what ever works for you i suppose.

My hair actually sucks today, but I realize that not every day can be wonderful. I'm actually thinking about eliminating the remainder of the relaxer to be done with it (about 1 - 2 inches)...at this point, what difference would it make? The pony tail option was eliminated during my last affair with the scissors!!! Once I do this, the twists will probably stay a lot longer than they have been. As far as coming up with the right combination of products that work for you, this is hard. I have a feeling that you just have to keep it really moisturized (not GREASY!) and wash it regularly with a mild shampoo that's not too drying. I actually like experimenting with it though. It's kind of fun. I still havent gotten the confidence to wear without a headband though. I have to get past this. Will send more later.

I'm really thinking that since my hair is rather ugly already, why not try and get it locked now....what do you think?

WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it's a good thing i'm sitting down.
you know i was out last nite at a jamaican club (yeah and i'm dying now) anyhows this guy with locs comes up to me starts pulling on my hair and asks me if i'm locing. i said i'm not sure what i'm doing yet. he says well i hope you're doing it for the right reasons, it had better be from the heart. so i guess real rastas take offense to those who loc for 'the wrong' reasons. i did not even think like that!!

how is your hair today? mine is teeny weeny two strand twists.

Andrea,
Why is it that locs have to be some type of religious expression?
Are Rastafarians the only ones who have traditionally worn locs, or have they also adorned the heads of certain Africans who have religious beliefs that are far more ancient than the Rastafarian faith? I'm just asking for I'm not sure.
Anyway, I wouldn't worry about WHY one chooses to go that route as long as the person making the choice is happy with their decision. If I go with locs, it will be basically for the pure natural beauty of them and nothing further. They will be washed on a regular basis, hooked up and oiled, and FLY!
Why is it that people like to rain on someone elses excitement or happiness? I hate that about us!


Well,
I finally DID it!
I believe after not just one, but TWO self-trimming sessions over the weekend, I have eliminated ALL of that dead relaxer from my hair! If I missed any, it's in the back where I can't see it.
The good thing is that most of the hair is now one texture. I will probably not have much problem now getting a professional to deal with it. My experience is that they do not want to deal with it as you grow out of a relaxer. This is why they convince most women to simply buzz it off to a TWA.
I went to the Body Shop and bought some of this African hair and body mud and left it on my hair for about 20 minutes. My hair was a lot easier to comb out but I wonder if part of that was because I've cut off the relaxed ends. I then set my hair on sponge rollers (yeah, I know! They are horrible on your hair and cause breakage, but I can't sleep on any other kind).
As usually is the case, I am sporting the headband, but the hair 'sprouting' over the top is thick, full of texture and kind of cute! I'm building up the nerve to go to a natural hair care salon and see what they can do for me.
By the way, the little girl who told me I had nappy hair couldn't keep her hands off of it this weekend! She was like 'it's so soft!!' Our hair is NOT wooly! It is COTTONY!!!!

WOW!

see that happened to me too. i just got to the point where i wanted ALL the relaxer gone. i felt like i couldn't see my hair properly with the straggly ends still hanging off. i can't believe the 12 year old had a change of heart just like that huh? it's a beautiful thing.
so how does it look different than when you twist and pin it? more curl than wave?
this coming weekend (memorial weekend) is the tail comb twists. on saturday i took my twists out and now i'm left with these little spirally curly things. my sister couldn't stop touching my hair either. all i kept hearing was 'i love your hair, i love your hair like this'. i'm also wear a headband, the kind they tell you NEVER to use, you know those plastic ones with a million and one teeth?
i plan to take photos today (see photos for May) as i don't think it will last much longer. there's a fine line between looking cute and disaster!!

went out again last nite a coupla guys started calling me 'dread' one of them asked me if i was in fact gonna dread, 'i don't know' was my usual response and what did he say? 'do it from the heart'. i said 'so i must turn rasta'? he never did answer me!!
WHERE'S THE PHOTO'S??

What kind of twists did you have that you took out that were so cool? I want to see pictures.
Finally, my hair is very curly right now....maybe a bit too curly! As far a the dreads, I don't know yet. I'm going to get used to the natural texture and curl pattern first before making that decision. My hair is extremely dark...almost black right now. It's just great to have the relaxed ends off.

MONTH ELEVEN

Girl,
You ain't gonna believe this! I did the mini twists at the salon.

What EVER bit of relaxer at the ends existed on my head is long gone... at the floor of the beauty shop.

The ordeal took FOREVER! Like, my appointment was at 11:00 - I was done at 2:15. Then, they wouldn�t take ANY checks so I had to run to the bank to get cash and bring it back.

I know one thing, if someone wants to knock a place off and make some money, all they have to do is hit this salon on a busy evening, like Friday or Saturday. Due to this, I will not mention the name or location of the joint! Don't wanna see a set of hard workin' sistahs being ripped off!

Anyway, as far as the twists are concerned...there are like a million of them. They are very fine....about an eigth of an inch in diameter (maybe not even that wide). They are no longer than 2 inches each. I have a feeling that even the headband could prove to be an issue initially with these bad boys. You KNOW the in famous headband is my security blanket!!!!! The total price charged was $65. (Of COURSE I had to tip about 15%, so needless to say, I am rather broke!) They will last only until they get wet. This part is the drag, as I usually go no longer than a week without washing my hair, and hate to think that $65 plus tip is about to go down the drain within 7 days. There is an awful lot of gel and spray on it so that the hair feels rather hard. Actually, it feels CRUNCHY! Seeing as though I'm one that doesn't like alot of grease or spray, this is not a thrill for me.(how will I survive locs? Maybe I'm STILL not ready!)

I'm now in need of some true encouragement. Fortunately I do not go into the office until Thursday, so perhaps they will fatten up a bit. The verdict is still out in terms of how I feel about them. I feel like I look kind of 'hard', if you know what I mean. I think the makeup is going to take on a greater sense of importance in my life as long as these exist.

Also, I think WHAT I wear will be increasingly important. The beautician says that I would have beautiful locs because my hair is so thick. I don't know how long it would take for them to 'set' or lock on me, and I can�t afford $65 each week to get them started. I'm not sure where to turn at this point.

I do have pictures of the 'before' mini-twist application. I need more poloroid film, but will pick some up tomorrow. PROMISE! I will send pictures of the twist results that I did, as well as what is in my hair right now. These things look like little worms or something actually. I think I will like them better once they swell up some. I would also like them if there were approximately 40 pounds LESS of me! You KNOW peoples reactions at work will be worth writing about....I bet very few of them will say anything directly to me, which is a BAD sign! I don't believe I did this! They gettin' ready to shatter a sistah's ego a bit, I think! Write more later.
D

this is too much.

i also did the hair this weekend, i had it tail comb twisted. she used a mixture of beeswax and gel when i saw her mixing the two together i was cringing cause i remembered the gel days and no matter how much they claim 'non flaking' there was always these whiteish gray dandruffey cornflakes things left sitting atop my head after a few days. not to mention the itching and once you scratch it, forget about it!

i got there at 10am got in the chair at 11:20 sat under the hair dryer at 12:30 and was outta there around 1:15pm. i paid $60. i'm not exactly sure how i feel about the results. the top and middle is all going back but the sides are like hanging down. people have either said they like it (not with much enthusiasm) or commented on how much they look like dreads.

like you, i was told they will last til they get wet or for a month whichever comes first (get wet!). i tell you what though, i can't stand this itching and i feel like i have no control. i don't want to waste 60 bucks but............. i was kinda used to my 20 big fat twists which i could reach up and touch and twirl and untwist and retwist and my girls always wanting to �do my hair�

oh, i don't know. we'll see i suppose.

MONTH ELEVEN & a half

you know, i was just in the elevator and it's all shiny glass like metal inside, then i saw my hair.

i thought, you know, this doesn't look so bad. if i stop fighting it and just let it fall where it wants.

now both sides have fallen and the top / middle is still kinda going back. i'm thinking, maybe i'll get some of those little silver diamondy hair pin clip things and work with it a little, you know, give it a chance. 60 bucks got to last longer that one week!!


i thought for sure i would have done away with this style by now. but i have started spraying it with oil sheen and it's coming along much better now. I've decided to stick it out for the month, then maybe color it, then go back to my big twists for awhile.
it is quite normal i'm sure, when contemplating locs to have a change of heart (quite often) especially if the masses are doing something totally different or the folks heading down the road you want to take don't look too appealing!
i would stick it out unless you're really miserable, don't loc til you're mentally ready, just like when you decided to go natural (the big one). the good thing is that you have around 3 months to change your mind, and you can just take the twists out.
i would keep reading, keep checking websites, cause we need to surround ourselves with people 'like us' to keep the faith.

i've re-scheduled with Dixie for tomorrow at 3, but since I didn't actually talk to her, this may have to change. When I spoke to the lady on the phone, I told her that Dixie did comb twists two weeks ago and I would like to have them re-done but I want to loc. She said that she would more than likely definately) wash it. THANK GOD!!!!!!! Getting excited. As soon as it's done, will get more polaroid shots and send them to you! Girl! This scalp can't wait! I'm starting to feel a bit nasty, like one more day and I'm taking these bad boys out myself and doing a deep conditioner and twist them up me-self!


Man,
Went to your website and saw my mugshot there! Kind of frightening to have ones hair ordeal published in such a way! At least my name ain't bein' used!

Seeing as though it will probably take my mess a while to loc, I will go on for re-twisting again today. Will send pictures shortly after (sometime next week). Keep your fingers crossed.

the very next day

You are not going to believe this! My salon visit was like a double-edged sword. First of all, girlfriend left me waiting for 2 hours! I actually stayed because by then the traffic on Route 1 was bumber to bumber, and I really was dying for a shampoo. She shampoo'd then twisted. I've already started locing!
She says, 'Do you want to loc, 'cause if you don't, we're at the point where you're going to have to cut'. I'm like, let's go for it! She says that some clients with extremely soft hair will dread fast because their hair nats up so. Apparently this is the mess that's on my head!

say what????????!!!!!!!!!! so did she just re-twist what was already there? how much did it cost? when do you go back?

There was a woman there who had locs but cut them out. She says that they are real hot in the summer. She also seemed to think they were too common-place now and everyone had them. I guess for this reason, she had beaten her hair back into submission with a relaxer.

D said that she has a client that dreaded within a month. She only wants to see her now once every three weeks. This woman had locs to her shoulders within two - three months. That seems awfully fast to me. But, as you can see, there really is no turning back for me at this point!
So, this makes it official.

I am two weeks into the locking process!

OK, here goes....
She first gave me that good, ol' fashioned Trinidadian shampooing! Complete with nails. She used some kind of peppermint shampoo so it relieves the scalp. She then conditioned it. Rinsed with warm water then warned me that she was going to do a cool rinse (read COLD!)
She had to re-twist my whole head. The deal with the part that was already starting to loc....it was locking at the ends. This would be the hair that you would normally comb out when your hair gets all knotted. Think about it! Those little knots of hair that you eventually break off when combing through tangled hair. It seemed not to take her as long to do but that could be my imagination.
My hair is trying to loc in the kitchen, and a bit up top. Funny, because my kitchen is the softest and curliest. I'll get more polaroid film but the style is such that I have some twists framing my face and the rest going back.
I'm going to try to wait three weeks this time. She said in time, your scalp will get used to not being washed as frequently. She says three weeks will be better than two for me. She's already talking color!
When the scalp starts to itch and feel uncomfortable, use the seabreeze. She does not use beeswax. She says it 'melts'. I think she considers using it once you have actually locked but I'm not sure.
I told her that not all my sister friends liked it but so far, ALL of my male friends did! She was like, 'shoot, girl! 'Dem de' ones dat count! Who cares as long as the men like it!' She was cracking me up on this one!
The price of all this was $55. She says as they get longer however, the price will increase because it will take a long time to re-tighten them.
The woman that had cut her locs out said she would twist hers all the time..watching tv, at the movies...at work....sitting in traffic.
D says that you don't want to twist them too often or too tight because you will snap them off at the root. It sounds like we're cultivating a plant! It seems so organic! It sounds like you simply water and handle with care!

Sending a photo or two this morning. They are just as bad really as the last ones I sent. (I'm really unphotogentic, coupled with a lousy polaroid and you get what I'm talking about! YIKES!) Anyway, it's only been since Wednesday, and some of my twists are trying to come unglued! Especially in the front. I have this one that was completely undone this morning....tried to twist that puppy back up. It got real thick, somewhat twisted, then decided to stick straight up on my head! This probably wouldn�t be so bad if it wasn't the very front, but it! Top it off, a lot of my twists appear to have these rather straight, spiky ends....whazzup with that?!!!! Not really liking it all that much today. Maybe I should have thrown the headband into my bag before I left this morning.
What recent thing have you done with yours? Give details including how you like it!
The worst thing I can think about having these twists is the fact that I do not get the opportunity to play around with my hair and experiment.

right now i have it in chinese bumps. the tail comb twists have been in for 3 1/2 weeks and was starting to get old, so i took em and twisted them up. i'm gonna take some photos. maybe today.

Last night, I sat with a bit of gel (the clear kind! Not that icky brown stuff that every beautician seems to favor) and began re-twisting some of my twists. It's really a tedious thing to do, but my hair is looking a lot better.

Two things I noticed during this time though. First of all, the loctician used a lot less of the gel, and I think this is why they had a tendency to come undone faster. Remember I said they were kind of 'crunchy' last time? Well, this time, they weren't and I'm sure it's due to less gel being used. Also, my scalp doesn�t itch nearly like it did the last time. Secondly, I have not been adding oil or a lot of spray to my hair, so I think it's not getting as dirty as before. I haven't had to resort to the Sea Breeze yet.

One common thread in a lot of the responses that you are getting to your website concerns the versatility of natural hair in comparison to locs. I too, have this concern, although I've obviously decided that locs are my destiny. Locs appear to be rather versatile depending on the length of them. Right now, there really isn't anything versatile about my mini twists....headband....no headband.....these are my choices!!!! But this too, will change as these babies start to actually loc and grow.

Did you get the pictures yet? If not, the next set I send may have to be sent via USPS to your house! This darn interoffice mail's gotta go!

did you have to retwist your entire head?
someone had written me about a natural aloe gel. i've asked her to write me with more info about it.
i took my hair out last nite, tomorrow would have been 4 weeks and it had started to loc at the ends in some spots!! i got kinda scared there for a minute. now i just have the big twists in. tonite b4 bed i'll massage a mixture of warm olive oil and castor oil on my scalp rub it through to the ends of the hair and put the doo rag on. then in the morning proceed to wash and deep, deep condition with queen helene cholesterol treatment.
what's next? i have noooo clue. whatever i do, i'll take photos of.

No, I didn't re-twist the entire head. I actually sat at the table with a cup of water, gel, mirror in front of the tv and got busy! I retwisted all along the front and a bit at the top. The back comes undone real fast, but couldn't quite figure it out because it's so tangled back there. Didn�t want to put twists that were the wrong size back there.
What's interesting is all these hair products I have at home that are currently USELESS to me! What should i do with them? I don't know how long they will be any good. Hopefully they will last until I loc and can start washing my own hair!
D

ONE YEAR!





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