My Own Geek Code


Intelligence

IQ+>++

I'm just smart enough to
realize how dumb I really am.

IQ->---

I love the Cleveland Indians and spend half of
my entire paycheck for season tickets, even though
I could watch them lose for FREE on television.

IQ->----

I love the Cleveland Browns and spend half of
my entire paycheck for season tickets, even though
I could watch them lose for FREE on television.

!IQ

I don't need to go to school
because I already know everything.

IQ?

I had a degree,
but that was 10,000 beers ago.

IQ*

I am a psuedo-intellectual
who sits around campus all day long,
yacking aimlessly about politics and
other social issues so that everyone else
can hear how many REAL BIG WORDS
I know; in a feeble attempt to lure that
stringy-haired psuedo-intellectual girl
(wearing those John Lennon glasses with a
"Make Love / Not War" button on her shirt)
and GET IN HER PANTS!

IQ1/2

Where's my Dixie flag?

1/IQ

Motor skills only.

Sex

M (or XY)

Male

F (or XX)

Female

MWF

I have sex every Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

XYw/IQ

Male with Brain:
I hate sports. If I really wanted to
watch a bunch of morons toss a ball
back and forth, I could just visit the
local playground during recess.

XYw/oIQ

Male without Brain.
"Food... women... sports...";
and maybe some Star Trek in between.

XXw/IQ

Female with Brain.
Caution: directly affects "bitch factor".

XXw/oIQ

Female without Brain:
Making love to me is like jacking off
on a marinated pile of make-up.

Age

a10

I'm into Pokemon

a20

I'm into Quake

a30

I'm into Pokemon & Quake,
but for different reasons

a40

I know WHY it's called a phone 'dial'

a50

I remember when AM radio was "cool"
and when FM radio was "elevator muzak"

a60

I remember when there was no TV
...or do I???

a70

People stampede out of the public restroom
when they see me hobble into a stall.

The Paranoid Factor

PF---

I raise Hell

PF--

I don't give a damn

PF-

So what?

PF

I worry about my car

PF+

I worry about my job

PF++$

I work at Pizza Hut

PF+++

I tape aluminum foil all over the place
and still have nightmares about my
'overdue library book' ordeal.

Oral Hygene

OH++

I have all 32 teeth,
or at least the 28 that count

OH+

My teeth aren't white
because I drink and smoke

OH

I have a few cavities

OH-

I am missing a tooth or two

OH--

It took 3 engineers to design my last bridgework

OH---

NASCAR fan

OH----

When I close my mouth,
my teeth neatly mesh into one row.

Breast size

(for you women only... directly follows the 'XX' chromosome code)

. .

I am flat-chested

o o

I am a qualified mammal

(.)(.)

I am normal

( . )( . )

I have big udders

(_._)(_._)

NASCAR fan

UU

I am over 70 years old
so who gives a crap, anyway?

Blood Type

A+

A positive

A-

A negative

O+

O positive

O-

O negative

CH3OH

I drink too much

C2Cl3F3
=[CH]6=
4(N2O)

I wreck a lot of cars

The EMO (techno-slang for "emotional") in You

:-)

I am a happy person

:-(

I am a sad person

8-( : )

I have been inside a UFO once

:-O

I burp a lot

[ : ]

My head is shaped like a square box

@#$%^&!

I drive a car in Akron, Ohio



Return to the MISCELLANEA PAGE
1
Hosted by www.Geocities.ws