You know how you might call a tall guy Shorty, or a big fat guy Tiny, well, I suppose I would call Space Monkey Perfectly-normal-universally-hated-moron. How to describe Space Monkey. Well, even if I were Tyler Durden, Space Monkey is far beyond the state of Jack.
Space Monkey is a pagan, albeit a half-assed one. No, a bit more than that, I would say about three-quarter assed. He's religious in a way that I don't have the faith for. He can believe something, know it, without needing it proved, and anyone who thinks that this is a flaw should see the success it has brought him. The only measure of religious success is happiness and good guidance of one's life, and I defy anyone to say that Space Monkey lacks these things.
But regardless of whether his religion advocated this or not, Space Monkey is also unbelievably loving. This is a man who can love to the same degree as I, but who, even if he has the ability, seems never to hold hatred. First and foremost is his love for Kathy. I hope that I'm something of a second in line, but wherever I am, I'm happy to be there.
Despite such a capacity for love, however, Space Monkey has a capacity for scientific understanding hardly rivaled by the super computer he installed in his mother's office. He can ramble on for an hour with at least one term regarding a computer, law of physics, or tool/mechanical object every ten seconds that I don't understand, as I simply sit and think to myself, "Yogi really is smarter than the average bear, he can fucking talk!". He is the techie in the Three Libras as much as I am the philosophizing psychotic gun-wielder.
No, wait, Space Monkey is a philosophizing psychotic gun-wielder too. I suppose that's simply one of the things we share. After all, there's certain things that anyone I would value so much would just have to have in common with me. Intelligence. Aesthetics. No shame. No fear.
And I do value him. He is the greatest friend I've ever had. On one day, we can discuss the greatness of Fight Club and the downfalls of Catholicism. On the next, we can throw a small nudist party on his boat/in his hot tub. On the next, we can play Vampire for half of the night and play video games for the rest. On the next, he can bail me out of jail where I've been locked up for carrying an illegal weapon or fucking in public.
Do you have any friends like this? I hope so.