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10/31/2004     Sunday     Cold and Cloudy
Week Review: Busy as hell!! Theme Meal came off okay, Jason seemed happy about it. My costume was SMOKING!!! I was told that by numerous people. I have yet to obtain a picture of it. SOOO many people stared at me, so many that it was obscene (I gotta admit that I liked the attention, MUAHAHA). I'm gonna be a cross-dresser now... NOOO!!! Thanks a bunch, Sammy...
I'm in touch with my vampire self again... going to bed at 5am and waking up at... as late as possible. Why? don't ask.
Jason actually sent me an E-card and told me good job on the theme meal... he's okay afterall.
DDR day again: I destroyed them, hehe. I miss seeing little Jen do DDR...

10/27/2004     Wednesday     Cloudy and Chilly
Study day~~ even skipped classes to do so... but ended up sleeping in the library for about 2 hours. And I'm still goofing off right now. Very very very tired...
Tomorrow is theme meal day, yay!! I hope it all goes well.

10/26/2004     Tuesday     Cold and Cloudy
The warm days aren't returning anymore. It's cold out there and in here.
Wohoo!! Two more days until theme meal! I hope it all go well, since I put X-amount of work into it. It'd better go well. Or else I'd cry.
"Date at the Library": It was good studying... It was like, fun. Little Jen shrank in my Gap coat. It looked like she actually reduced in mass, hehe.

10/21/2004     Thursday     Cold and Cloudy
Someone is getting all clingy all over again... This is wrong, and illogical.

10/20/2004     Wednesday     Cloudy and Chilly
Feels funny: functioning under caffeine but not really awake, yummy white chocolate mocha...
Boost of self-esteem: nice compliments I got last night. Don't hear that kind of compliments too often.
Real damn tired: that is very well deserved, once again. Since I stayed up doing stuff that I can't talk about. What was it you ask? Well, I can't talk about it. Even though I would like to... talking it out might clear out my confusion a little bit. Think twice about it... Nope, I had the whole summer to sort it out myself. But it was never resolved. I know what I want, but that doesn't really matter.
Ran into Bryce, Sean, and Julia on my way home at a strange time. They kinda gave me this look "where are you heading besides school at this time?" Felt somewhat embarrassed and very speechless. Had no clue how to explain why I was there at that time and heading that direction. And of course I can't speak the truth...

10/18/2004     Monday     Varied
Whoa, felt like a major prick today. But that felt nice. Stupid Terry. What "I can do my job and you can do your job"... I think he needs to redefine his definition of "work". Replied Jason's email real nicely too, hehe. That prick. I hate people disregarding me.

10/16/2004     Saturday     Sunny
BullSh!t-- That's all.
Slept a little too much today? maybe, I'm still tired...

10/15/2004     Friday     Sunny
Somehow my mom is pissed off at me because she wanted me to do things for her while I'm busy as hell. It ain't my fault that I don't have time to get it done.
*sigh* I'm messed up... My mind is too weak. I give in way too easily. And I fucking let loose again. Thinking about "shouldn't have done it" is never enough. But what the hell am I gonna do? nothing. Time does not wash things away.
Sammi knows nothing of what's going on between me and Crystal, because I don't either. Everyone's victimized by my emotions, that's what I know.

10/9/2004     Saturday     Sunny
Saw Sarah's baby boy- Noah. And he is sooooo cute!!! I don't care if I sound like a chick, but he's sooooOOOOOO cute. Babies are better before they can speak... haha. But, I still don't know Sarah.
Ended up hanging out with little Jen instead.
Almost got a stupid parking ticket today. Not once, but twice!! stupid parking services had the parking lot reserved. Fortunately I got to my car before they got their hands on it. Everyone else in that parking lot got a damn ticket though.
Lots of new guys working today. Poor Megan the janitor. But she's so damn lucky. Tim told me to switch her with someone stronger, and then Bill asked me to do something about it... and then Greg Barrett asked me to do something about it again. Pressure from a boss, a person of equal status (?), and then a subordinate, I guess I had to do it, huh? Is she really all that attractive? But still, poor girl, Bjorn wouldn't stop talking to her, haha, he even waited for her to finish cleaning, it was 9:45pm by then. What a freaking creep. Grr... I'm jealous, she got so much attention... hehe.

10/8/2004     Friday     Northwest WA weather
Yay, I did my first class-skipping of the school year, what an accomplishment. Went and bought DDR extreme last night, and played it for a little while after midnight. I discovered that it's really hard not to be noisy playing that thing... Hopefully I won't ever get into trouble doing it. Nobody came knock on my door last night though.
Sushi Night tonight~ Big crowd, yay! I hope it's gonna be as fun as Becky is excited for it. Now, all I have to do is study before I go and have fun.
And then it started pouring as we drove up to Richmond. But the trip was totally worth it. I out-ate everyone, no one even came close to eating as much as I did. MUAHAHAHA.

10/6/2004     Wednesday     Sunny
Why is today not a weekend? It's too sunny to be a weekday.
Discussion with Marcus about 80's night at "feebie's"(?) Conclusion: I gotta become 21 so I can check out the scenes.
2 more days until sushi day. I think I can organize this whole thing with like 15 people? yeah, probably.
The staff didn't like my music too much today, oh well. Didn't have time to change CD, too bad.

10/3/2004     Sunday     Sunny
Work-Meeting-DDR!!-more work-homework...
Must buy DDR Extreme, it came out only 2 weeks ago... hehe.

10/2/2004     Saturday     Sunny
I told my friends that I can't hang out with them tonight, but I feel insanely lonely. Because I gotta do homework. I really wanted to eat dinner with my staff after work, but I always have to double check everything before I leave. Good thing I waited that Bjorn guy to finish eating before I went to eat. Hate listening to him talk, even though I've only done it once. But once was quite enough. Anyways, that left me the last person in the whole dining hall. It looked very big and lonely.

10/1/2004     Friday     Sunny
I don't think I should ever party with those guys again... taking shots of whiskey instead of 2 gulps of beer isn't very fair. And that stupid smell of fish made me puke after getting home at 4am. That damn dad of mine knows that I don't like that smell, why can't he open the stupid windows after cooking fish. Enough Bitching.

9/26/2004     Thursday     Cold Sun
I feel really tired. Probably should have gone home and slept earlier last night. Emotionally tired too, the same occurring thought came back once again: Life is full of work, social life is barely there; and love life is completely stagnant. The sad part is I'm not striving to make my life better, but instead I just sit and hope that it will be better.
Both of Bob's parents died over the weekend... That sounded so ridiculous. But he took it so well, his comment was "I wish I had bought a lotto ticket on Saturday.

9/29/2004     Wednesday     Still Sunny, but cold
Uniform needs to get washed. I wore them(2 shirts) everyday for 2 weeks straight and they were brand new.
Sammy thought she lost her wallet. But it was in her car.
Someone was really happy that someone else turned 22 today and so they wrote it all over campus... I bet the two are related somehow.
Meeting, meeting, and more meeting. I got to talk with Susan Vougelson, that was interesting... felt more like she was doing a personnel profile on me though. "what year are you?" "what do you study?" gathering some stats, maybe?
Sushi trips are coming back to life :) Jen's in, Becky's in. Just waiting for a couple more responses and then I can set it in stone.
I blew my cover once again by playing Marilyn Manson in the dining hall. But I do love that shit... *sigh* But of course, the kids thought I really rock.

9/25/2004     Saturday     Still sunny
Went to the wrong party last night... everything was kinda weird. No regrets though, at least I got to see Gary and Sepine. Those people felt very "hierarchical" for some reason although it wasn't like they were in triad or anything like that.
Work totally rocked today... everyone all got done either on time or early. Just simply amazing.

9/24/2004     Friday     Surprisingly Sunny
Feels looney... it's only 6pm but it's way past bedtime. Worked a little too much, working everyday? And not a day off until Tuesday on the week after next. I have no life. *cries*
So tired that I'm going crazy. Should go home and take a nap.
It really feels like sitting in a corner and listen to Dashboard Confessionals and cry right now. Maybe even Evanessence. It's never good when I really do feel like listening to Evanessence. Last time I did it... I did nothing but listen to Evanessence and tried to cry the best I could, but it didn't happen. I felt like shit nonetheless, it didn't help anything.

9/23/2004     Thursday     Typical Northwest weather
Finally kinda have day off. It feels like I have things that I should be doing. But it's probably just the sustained level of anxiety lasting from the past weeks. Burning some CD's, got 2 done already, how nice :D

9/22/2004     Wednesday     Cloudy, rain droplets
First day of school!! Whoohoo. Felt kinda weird packing backpack, didn't really want to go back to school. Summer was actually cool because there was nothing else to do besides work, and have fun, (and get falsely attached). Went through a bunch of paperwork last night and tossed a bunch of them. Found this uniform agreement from VC that was signed by Sarah N. Anderson. I don't remember that happening and I didn't really know her back then. Anyways, she's been Sarah Allen since I got to know her through work. I supposed her signature changed... It was just kinda weird to have found Sarah's old signature out of nowhere.
Felt pretty workaholic lately. Been working couple days straight already since the end of SM training week. New employees have been pretty awesome, been getting out 1/2 hour late only.

9/21/2004     Tuesday     I don't remember
I flipped off Justin, and little Jen went "AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" at approximately the pitch of high high C (2 lines above staff). My ears didn't appreciate that too much. It took us a while to find out why too...

9/20/2004     Monday     Bright N' Sunny
Viking Commons' BBQ dinner: Boy, was I confused, haha. Everyone came in and asked me what they were doing. After the meal, I sat and ate with Katie and Andrea, and Andrea had to remind me to look at the sunset... Sunset and Andrea: those memories of summer will probably last for a good while. Good times even though we were being janitors and didn't get to leave after everyone was gone on a Friday...

9/16/2004     Thursday     Cloudy, rain droplets
Nice long 3 hour-meeting today. Kinda afraid to look at Jason when I brought up his problem... Seen a lot of "I"s in the student manager team during scheduling. Not too happy about that. Feel really overwhelmed with stuff right now... argh. Should probably take sometime to relax, and then make my schedule for these few coming days... Feels like I need one of those Emily-styled to-do list. Looks like I've got quite a bit on my plate. Very unorganized thoughts going on... not very healthy mentally.

Student Manager Training Week:
Miscellaneous: She does have a boyfriend, too bad. I missed out a lot of partying because I'm not 21 yet. Gotta do sushi again sometime, once we can find some time for it. I just want to tell all the secrets to everyone, wouldn't that be nice? Got Rebeckah's number for some odd reason, most likely not gonna use it though.
Food School: Felt kinda like "cook's help", chopped parsley for like 3 hours or something like that. And then made some rice balls, actually a lot of them.
Lake Padden BBQ: real good food, what can I say. Little Jen thought that I should have a girlfriend, just like Jason. "When are you going to have a significant other so you can introduce her to us?" There were quite a bit of those there, you know those. Student manager bringing their special friend there. It was encouraged, so... quite a few pairs. Ian's back with Della, so sudden, and he didn't let me know either. I guess there won't be awkward moments at the sushi.
Lakewood challenge course: it was way too fun. I did not want to go home. Got lots of bonding done, I suppose. Way too good to be turned 360 degree, literally and physically.
Breakout sessions: Lots of people taking turns talking... most of which I just tossed them the moment the day was over. I'm sure it wasn't a good idea. Probably should have taken notes.

9/6/2004     Monday     Honestly, I don't even know
Still young and invincible. MUAHAHA. Didn't do jacksh!t for b-day, if moving doesn't count. Moving was quick. Everything were done in like 6 hours. Ate dinner with Sammy at House of Orient, the waiter looked more Indonesian or Indian than Thai, food was decent though.
The days after moving... nothing but Star Ocean: Till the End of Time. My gamer self got the better part of me, big time. My body is not liking the lack of sleep too much.
There haven't been a sunny day for awhile.
Still have thoughts about the Evangelion... really want to see the last movie of it. But thinking about it pushes my self-esteem into a bottomless pit... damn you Shinji!!! I mustn't run away. I mustn't run away. I mustn't runaway... work is almost starting, I must get myself back. Where are you, KingYau?

8/31/2004     Tuesday     Sunny-- but not that it matters
Heheh, watched TV for a whole day. Now that's vacation~~ nothing to worry about. I can do nothing if I freaking wanted to. No crazy $#@! father nagging me about sh!t. All that matters to me is that I can make sure I'm all right, that's all that matters. If I'm not a good child, whatever.
And I turn 20 in 2 and 1/2 hours. Which means, I'm no longer a teen? whoa... anyhow, I'll always be 17 :D

8/30/2004     Monday     Sunny Sunshine!!
Vacation Review:
Shopped like crazy... Purchased the Evangelion anime series, 85 dollars. The Killers' Hot Fuss, 10 dollars. Velvet Revolver's Contraband: 14 dollars. Glass chess/checker/backgammon set: 15 Canadian. Cross necklace/clock: 16 Canadian. A shirt from Parker's Place, Richmond: 25 Canadian?
WaterMania: Gross, salty pool water. Yeah, artificial waves... so what? It feels more dangerous than fun. The pool was probably too crowded. Oh well, at least now I know the way to entertainment ave.
Evangelion: watched the whole series in 3 nights. Understood a lot more of it than when I first saw it at the age of... 11? But it's also a very lonely thing to watch. Why? It's interesting how the 3 characters handle their desires to be close to other people. Masterpiece. Now I want the other releases after the TV series!! They are so pricey... *Cries*
Green Trucks: I've never realized how many of them are out there... Or they've been catching my eyes for some reason. Ummm... feels like I've been voodoo or something.
Crystal: Kinda wanted to see her, see how she's doing. But I just gave myself a junk load of excuses instead. Oh well, I can see her when school starts.
New home: signed lease agreement today, still a little anxious about whether I can pay (549 + water + cable) per month...
Financial aid: It's awesome. It gives me more than enough money for tuition, that means I'm gonna have free money, wohoo. I think.
Father and Siblings: I'm not six years old anymore. Yuk's refusing my father toy-buying reminds me of grandmother who always gave me money. Same dilemma my little brother faced as I did, I knew I wanted to keep grandma's money, but doing so will get mom to yell at me. I don't like family vacation spots. And why doesn't he just quit trying!! Knowing how to spoil kids doesn't make anyone a good father.

8/18/2004     Wednesday     Sunny
It's been a while since I last got onto the internet... wow. 8 FULL DAYS!! Pulled another 40 hours week within the weekend. But everything was over by then. Cleaned up the VC over the weekend. WOHOO!!! Vacation awaits me... I have about 2 weeks, I think.
Vacation, which also means... I'm not gonna see Andrea for awhile. And when the school start, I won't see her as often as I did during summer... (Social Psych. Principle: If you see someone more, you'll like that person more.) I saw Andrea A LOT over summer since we both got crazy amount of hours... The super-studs of the Viking Commons, we were.
Sushi last night... Ian, Andrea, Little Jen, Ricky (Ian's friend). It wasn't nearly as fun. Stupid Ian got all territorial about Andrea. I wanted to tell him, "you know, I met her way before you did. Don't you try to make reservations on her." And on top of that, he got about 4 other girls on reserve. Don't really want to confront him though, since he's an okay person. Unlike my "favorite douche bag". It just irritates me... how can anyone get territorial about something that's not even his?! He shouldn't have to behave like that either. He got much better appeal than I do anyhow. He's her age, unlike me, who's like over 3 years younger. He's bigger, taller, and he's Caucasian. That's all on this topic...
Hmm... looks like I worried somebody (bitched way too much here, I suppose?) Everything is good though. Got all my screaming taken care of, mostly done in the VC's Kitchen, it's loud enough back there, haha. People actually have been telling me that I look like I have infinite amount of energy... Always hyperactive. Doesn't matter how much I work. I'm always smiling and still looking happy. I really like that complement... thanks Katy A., again. Hyperactivity should come in real handy as a student manager, since how I act will affect how the other employees act. Let's make everything more looney :P

8/10/2004     Tuesday     Sunny and Rotting Hot
Hahaha, my scheme worked!! Worked 40 hours in 4 days... haha, hahaa. And no work for 2 and a half day, ain't that awesome!! Now I can plan my week... hehe. *sigh* I need to get much done today though. Apartment!!! I need a new place to live in...

8/9/2004     Monday     Sunny
I feel like I REALLY need a shower... wow, spent a little too much time in the dishroom today. It got me all nice and warm.
Andrea's got it down, we're just gonna start rumors about ourselves. Well, if she doesn't mind, I'm totally in, it sure sounds like fun. It started since last Wednesday... according to Jason, "I heard that you two (Andrea and I) were here till one (am) last night... what's that about?"
Truth: We were in VU's dishroom cleaning till 9pm.
BS: "We just decided to stay there and we made out in their freezer..." ~Me
Of course I didn't pass up the chance to BS, haha. And there will be plenty more BS for the time to come.
I just wonder... what does she think about all these? (help? anyone? any idea?) She was like, "let's make Jason into thinking that we are a couple."
"Who's-with-who" rumors reminds me of elementary school, back in the days when no one knew what love or sex is. It was really fun to embarrass those "couples" just because they had no way to argue themselves out of it. But I guess it's now "fun" to get yourself into one...
And I got "Somebody Told Me" by the Killers stuck in my head all day today... Such a crappy song, but I actually like it!! I like this crappy song :(

8/8/2004     Sunday     Nice, Sunny, and too Warm.
It's finally over... my crazy lack of sleep weekend. Haha. But I still have to work at 8am tomorrow -_-" lame. Viking Commons is sucking my life away... and I still haven't found an apartment. Yikes!!
It was a nice day, because I was a major jackass... Asked Jason how come he didn't schedule me a grill helper... And told Beck that wiping table is not her job as a student manager, that lazy punk.
ahh...I need sleep, badly.

8/6/2004     Friday     Cloudy, slight Shower
Ha... haha. I woke up late for my 4pm shift. Isn't that amazing? Anyways... let's start somewhere. Went to Richmond sushi with Ian and Andrea last night. It was so awesome because it didn't seem awkward at all even though it was 2 guys and one gal. But I think it is actually kinda awkward underneath the surface because I think Ian is into Andrea. There's no doubt that Andrea is cute and kind though. So I don't blame Ian even though he had only known her for about a month. And boy he's getting desperate, a 23 yrs old man... We came back home last night about 1 am and I got up for a  6:30am shift...
Sleep was so good after work this morning... I just passed out. from 11am to 4:30pm... haha. Slept like a baby in the middle of the day. Had a weird dream to wake me up though... I saw Crystal, and we were doing something wrong... and somehow that woke me up.
By the way, today is officially the "student manager show up late" day. Justin 45 min late for 6am shift. Andrea was 30 min late for 6:30am shift. I was 40 min late for 4pm shift...

8/4/2004     Wednesday     Cloudy and Cool
Hmmm... I still feel like screaming. And I still don't know why. Maybe it's about time to freak out about finding an apartment? No day off this week... work, work, and work... I'm wasting my life away in that cafeteria!!! I think being tired is eating me up really good. I know because only about 70% of my speaking actually makes sense, and 90% out of that intelligible 70% is actually nonsense... Am I sleeping too much or am I not? I don't even know. Maybe I'm not okay at all... I'll find out though, eventually.
I quit being nice today, haha. Good old bitter Shirley said to me, "Get me some chicken" and then "Get me some chicken, you hear me?" And I replied, "I got a name, and I didn't hear you call me". And then poor Shirley decided she didn't want to ask me for help (or attempt to bitch me around) for the rest of the shift. HA!! Eat it.

8/1/2004     Sunday     Still Toasty~~
I really feel like screaming today... Don't know why, but I do feel like it. And it's not the freaked-out-chick scream, but it's the bottom-of-lung-raging scream. I want to get something out, but it's not going to happen. Just simply cannot do it. Nothing is going to change. Learned hopelessness sinking in, but it never gets the best of me.
I want the new Slipknot album. *Evil Smile*
Saw some people getting married today, they had their ceremony right outside of the Wilson Library. Didn't quite check out the couple as they were somewhat far away from me. However, it did leave me thinking, "Am I behind the schedule?" Especially today since I also thought about this is my last month of being a teenager... High expectations with criterion that I can't even name, and I'm not even close to being that good myself... I really need some luck.

7/31/2004     Saturday     Toasty~~
I succeed!! I said I wanted a life this week on Monday and I totally did... Let's see... DDR w/ Matt and Little Jen on Wednesday, Fencing on Thursday even though Rosaline changed her mind about going to dinner together. And I finally saw Spider-Man 2... now I really wonder... Andrea? It's mysterious... let's get off the topic now.
...Sammy said "we all have dirty little secrets". Well, not gonna tell. Maybe in a few years. Back to working for the Viking Commons yesterday, which I truly didn't miss.
I was listening to Pachelbel a little earlier, it made me depressed. I'm writing journal so I don't forget what I did... this is my diary now, too. Crazy... I post my diary online!! I forgot what else I was gonna write!!! Oh, yeah. Added entry for Tuesday...

7/27/2004     Tuesday     Sunny and Nice
YAY!! I broke a window at Arntzen Hall. Yes I did. Broke it with a truck too. But now I have junk load of paper work to do... Sodexho needs to file the incident, so does Western. Why? Because I was being a Sodexho employee and was driving a vehicle owned by Western... GRRR!! stupid systems. Other than that, it was fun driving around campus and get paid for waiting around while drinking white chocolate mocha.

7/26/2004     Monday     Sunny--T'was a warm day
I want a social life for this week, and I think I'll get it, let's see... it's possible, yes. Yea, I'll be calling. Why I want a social life for this week? That has something to do with work, because I am suppose to be done with work by 1:30 pm up till Wednesday and I get Thursday off (getting time off from work is really that exciting). But um... it seems like it s final's week for a bunch of people. Oh no... um, back to no life? That's bad.
Oh work--It's quite fun, but I don't think I'm capable to do it physically... even the retail carts are slightly too heavy for me. Or maybe I need some weight training. Other than that, delivering stuff is awesome though, I get to be outside a building, I get to drive around, and no "in your face" pressure to work hard.
Yikes, Sammy poked out something I really want to talk about with people but no, I cannot talk about it. Bad idea... no ruining reputation for me, lala lal... It's about Crystal, yeah. Let's hope that I forget what's this is about.

7/19/2004     Monday     Sunny--Toasty and Sweaty
When your friends talk to you and they meant only business... do you still call them friends? We can just cut the cr@p and go straight to business, it doesn't really matter that much to me... But you'd always greet them with a nice warm smile and a sincere "how are you?"
Candace got this weird email thing going on... experimental silence? I really don't know what to think. But I don't really like giving monologue either, it makes me feel like a drama queen or something, and it's not like I don't have enough melodrama going on for myself. Once in a while I'd pay a visit to the counseling center and I do so for a good reason, making sure that I'm alright, and I think it's about time to do it again. Before I tear my optimistic mask apart.
Wow...I've been a real sarcastic A-hole in this journal today.

7/18/2004     Sunday     Sunny
Not a whole of entries this week... hmmm. I wonder what I've been up to... yeah, video games and work. It's a nice day, just work from 10 to 2. And there was barely anything to do, everyone was standing around being bored.
Friday was a great day, went out and hang out with my fellow co-workers. But I didn't know there was so much going on... Yannick just wanted to hang out with Michelle. And then there was buzzed Amit trying to hit on Andrea. *Sigh* why are guys always so aggressive when it comes down to girls?
"Pressure cooker pick my brain and tell me I'm insane.
I'm so fuckin' happy I could cry.
Every joke can have its truth and now the joke's on you.
I never knew you were such a funny guy.
Oh nice guys finish last, when you are the outcast.
Don't pat yourself on the back, you might break your spine"
I was just pretending to be a social butterfly, but I didn't get to talk with anyone in depth. And there wasn't anymore chicks to hit on...
I have to go buy FF-X2. I'm getting very bored of my games...

7/15/2004     Wednesday     Cloudy, then Sunny
Woo Ho--- I get a day off from work tomorrow. Yay~ but I don't know what I'll be doing though. I hope that I don't just sit on my ass and get bored... I know I'll find something to do though, I got absolutely no problem with that, I think.

7/13/2004     Tuesday     Sunny--Hot
Yay... Finally a day that I can sleep in, kinda. Except my manager called me at 8 and asked if I wanted to work, but of course not, it is my sleep-in day :) So, I got lots of that done and lots of video gaming done too. And... Listened to quite a bit of my father pessimism, which I don't really need by all means. That pessimism of his was exactly what F***ED up my last summer. I have no idea why I am back for more this summer. Oh well, I guess it's better than tossing your dad out on the street, I suppose. But I know, one of these days, I'll have my own life in my very own hands, and I'll be happy, if not hyper.
And this is so weird... I totally thought about Candace yesterday, since we haven't talk for awhile. And guess what? She wrote a bunch of emails to people, and I'm one of them.

7/11/2004     Sunday     Sunny
....I need sleep. Ummm.... not really my fault I need sleep... I dunno why I have work at 6am. I think I value sleep a little more than that 20 dollars I make for waking at 5am. Hmm, haven't hear anything from Candace for a long while. Nothing from Crystal either. Haven't seen Sammy for a few days either. Nevermind, I saw Sammy 2 days ago. I'm looking forward to the week, working less, maybe I'll get a chance to claim a day of social life one of these days... I'm sitting here falling asleep again... bad, very very bad.

7/7/2004     Wednesday     Bright with Cool Breeze
Had some weird dreams last two days. Two nights ago, I dreamed something about me being in a relationship... Although I forgot all the details when the I woke up, but I felt like something was missing as I sat in my bed. I didn't know what was missing (and I still don't know), but it was like something was supposed to be there but it weren't. Maybe that I was loving someone in the dream? Or was I loved? But what felt missing was more solid, instead of a rather vague concept of "love". It was almost like waking up to find that an arm is missing. It could be that love is more solid than I thought it can be...?
Last night~ it was just nightmare-fest, dreams woke me up once in a while over the night. Or at least I thought that's what happened. No cold sweats. No 3-eyed Cyclops. I remember trying to get away from some cheetah though. And of course I failed and that's when I woke up.

7/5/2004     Monday     Bright
YEAH!! Smiles for Reel Big Fish, their music always make me happy. Yep, always. Not down with the country c*@p they were playing earlier today. Brought in my own Reel Big Fish for dinner, makes me happy. Now I'm tired. About to go sleep. Maybe my new story (Purpose) is that boring... I'm just trying to get in done sooner, but I guess not. It's making me really tired.

7/4/2004     Sunday     Toasty Bright
Work... more work. *sigh* what else I'd be doing other than that. I don't know. It doesn't even feel like as though I need the money at all. But I think I'll be glad later on as time go. Working on a national holiday, what kinda crap is that? I think I should get pay and a half, but the place is a rip-off, so no.
Hmmm... I'm getting pessimistic again, that's no good. But again, it's a holiday and I have no plans. I don't know where my friends went. I guess it's my fault that I'm not calling people up. Surprisingly, there are actually people in this computer lab. I don't know what they're up to, but it's just weird that I'm not completely alone.

7/2/2004     Friday     Cloudy and Gloomy
Wow, had such a nice day yesterday. I actually do have a life, haha. Got to see and eat lunch with Robin, who I haven't talked to for ages. It's so strange, she always seem happy to see me, but she never calls...
Fencing was great too. Got to do some sabre fighting, and Greg is so surprisingly good at it... yea, bruises are gonna show up pretty soon, I think. It's all good though, haha.
Something was weird today, I couldn't find what music I wanted to listen to when I got up. I popped in some Dashboard Confessionals but then I really wasn't in the depressing mood at all. And then neither putting in Green Day nor Reel Big Fish satisfied me. But now I am kinda down, after a couple of hours since I got up and I got a Dashboard Confessionals' song stuck in my head...

6/30/2004     Wednesday     Gorgeously Bright
Yawn.... I haven't woke up at 6am for 2 days in a row probably since... high school. Work had been ridiculously long and smelly (steamy dishroom :D). I was so excited to know that I'll have tomorrow off from work, yay. I get to sleep in, no alarm clock, no stinking me. And when I wake up, I get to pretend like I have a life. Well, gonna do some fencing tomorrow night, finally get that set up, pretty exciting too... it's been awhile since I got some fencing done.
Ahh... paycheck is going to be very exciting this time because I have 40 hours of work this week, JUST in THIS WEEK. It was pretty funny how my manager was getting super nervous because a few of the workers are almost getting overtime (40 hrs+), me included. Apparently he needs to explain why he lets it happen if that ever occurs. Yikes, getting into trouble for giving someone just a few extra bucks...

6/27/2004     Sunday     Gorgeously Bright
Long day of work, work and then some more of work. 11am to 9pm with only a 40 minutes lunch break @ 2pm. That was a hardcore day. Good thing I got to see the sunset at the commons today though, it's been a while since I saw it there last. It has to be one of the best places to see the sunset. It's indoor, glasses have  screens on them so the sun isn't bright enough to roast my eyes, and I get to sit in a chair. Imagine that quarter-sized, golden orange circle going into the horizon...

6/26/2004     Saturday     Sunny~~
My phone did something weird today, or maybe it wasn't the phone. Apparently it called Sammy and Allison while I was asleep. I don't think I have Multi-personality or now called Disassociative Identity Disorder, so I wouldn't have made the phone calls myself. And since it's a flip phone, it wouldn't be making phone calls even if I had slept on it. Maybe it was my father, who took off at midnight and I didn't see him come back though I stayed up till 5am (playing GTA anyways...) Ah well, better start locking my phone, for the hack of it. There had been NO GTA today since I got up, and it's already been 11 hours since I got up. Fun times working today, a whole bunch of people got turned away because their conference cards expired and they did not know. Then  the trash can outside the building caught on fire somehow. Oh my... so damn tired.