EMINEM -
THE REAL SLIM SHADY

The lyrics were too long so i had to divide the page into 2

(Talking)
    May I have your attention please, may I have your attention
    please, will the real slim shady please stand up, I repeat
    will the real slim shady please stand up.....we're gonna have
    a problem here.........

    (Verse 1)
    Ya'll act like you never seen a white person before
    jaws all on the floor
    like pam and tommy just burst in the door
    and started whoopin her ass worse than before
    they first were divorced
    throwing her over furniture (aaaaaah)
    It's the return of the...
    "awww..wait, no wait, you're kidding,
    he didn't just say what I think he did,
    did he?"
    and Dr. Dre said...
    nothing you idiots, Dr Dre's dead
    he's locked in my bassment
    feminist women love eminem
    chicka chicka chicka slim shady,
    "I'm sick of him, lookit him
    walkin around, grabbin his you know what
    flippin' to you know who"
    "yeah, but he's so cute though"
    yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head
    loose
    but no worse than what's goin on in your parents bedroom
    (eheheheh)
    sometimes, I wanna get on TV and just let loose
    but cant, but it's cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose

    My bum is on your lips, My bum is on your lips
    and if I'm lucky, you might just give it a little kiss
    and that's the message that we deliver to little kids
    and expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is
    of course they're gonna know what intercourse is
    by the time they hit 4th grade
    they got the discovery channel, dont they?
    we ain't nothing but mammals
    well, some of us cannibals
    who cut other people open like cantelopes
    but if we can hump dead animals and antelopes
    then there's no reason that a man and another man can't
    elope
    but if you feel like I feel, I got the antedote
    women wave your pantehose, sing the chorus and it
    goes..............

    (Chorus)
    I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
    all you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
    so wont the real Slim Shady please stand up, please stand
    up, please stand up
    cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
    all you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
    so wont the real Slim Shady please stand up, please stand
    up, please stand up

    (Verse 2)
    Will Smith don't got to cuss in his raps to sell records
    well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too
    you think I give a damn about a grammy
    half of you critics can't even stomach me, let alone stand
    me
    "but slim, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird"
    why? so you guys can just lie to get me here
    so you can sit me here next to britney spears
    shit,Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs
    so I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst
    and hear em argue over who she gave head to first
    little bitch, put me on blast on MTV
    "yeah, he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim, hee hee"
    I should download her audio on MP3
    and show the world how you gave eminem VD (aaaaaah)
    I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups
    all you do is annoy me
    so I have been sent here to destroy you
    and there's a million of us just like me
    who cuss like me, who just don't give a fuck like me
    who dress like me, walk, talk and act like me
    and just might be the next best thing, but not quite
    me.................

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