Last night was one of the more touching nights of my life. There are many things that have been of great influence in my life, but two highly important symbols of the most influence: swing dancing, and Liz. There are a few issues I need to resolve before I tell this amazing story however, such as the Prerunner V6 issue.
My parents seemed to work out their differences, but nonetheless their intense argument last night left me dazed all day at school. I didn't perform at optimum performance all day, and felt as though I was forgetful and spacey. Either way - they scheduled an appointment in town and told me they'd be home in time for my Lindy Hop lesson. So, after a long day of school, after cleaning the Church, I looked forward to seeing them on time. They were fifteen minutes late, which made me thirty minutes late for my lesson. It was very disappointing - it made me feel as though something I'd waited for, for so long, had just been taken away from me. It was so minor however, that I simply disregarded it and enjoyed talking to my father in the car nonetheless.

Before I left for dancing, Liz called and told me she'd be there, and that perhaps we could do something afterwards. She said she had an appointment at the hospital - that something was wrong . . . and so, she said she'd show up as soon as she could. Swing dancing ends at 11:30. She showed up at 11:00 and I followed her outside. We talked for awhile in her car, she talked to me about the situation, then we drove back to my house. We took the long way though - wrong turns etceteras. I think we both did it on purpose, just to spend more time actually talking instead of just kissing each other on my bed, which we both know we'd digress to.

We arrived at my house to find the company of Paul - the fisherman mentioned in earlier entries. It was very exciting to see him, and I enjoyed his company. I actually think my girlfriend enjoyed him too. Paul, being a veteran, immediately noticed Liz's "Air Force" shirt, and asked her, "Why the Air Force?". Overall, the night was warm, and I was able to retreat to my bedroom with Liz at around 1:00 in the morning. We talked and kissed until around 3:00, then we both went to sleep. We didn't want to get carried away tonight or anything, so we both relaxed. It was actually very romantic, although I must admit I like it when I gets a little bit more exciting. I'm human. I like her.

This however, is where my story begins.

I fell asleep first. She woke me up unintentionally petting my hair and then when she noticed I was awake she kissed me. This sort of thing went on for about thirty minutes, until she went to sleep. When she went, I watched her for a few minutes. I noticed that her entire body irked with what must have been pain. Her hand would go up behind her neck, to her tumor. She told me once to try talking to her when such a thing happened, and so, I did just that: I talked. I talked with her for two hours. When a person is asleep, they say the most deep and precious, the most truthful of their thoughts.

To give you all an idea of what I went through . . . at first she apologized. She said something about an event that had taken place in the car driving home from that night when she'd left my watch at her house. I had told her how I felt about her that night, and she took it very wrong. She felt uncomfortable, and so did I, all because there was a misunderstanding. I asked Merlin to speak with her about it, and apparently at some point he did. She apologized deeply, over and over again, telling me all these things: how she liked me so much, how I was adorable. The most interesting part was that she was totally asleep the entire time. I kissed her and she asked, "Who just kissed me?" "Don't kiss me if I don't know you". I would respond with, "Liz, it's me . . .", and she'd say, "Me? Why would I be kissing Me?". I'd reply with, "Liz, it's Bob", and then she'd say, "Oh, Bob is adorable. He's the only one allowed to kiss me."

She said other such remarks. She talked about Merlin, about Amanda . . . she said Amanda was her best friend, but that she worried about her and Seth, and them being alone tonight. At one point she got up out of bed, I pulled her back down of course, and she said, "Hey! I need to go help Amanda! I can't let her be alone with Seth!" It was very interesting. It's the true mark of a best friend when someone shows that sort of commitment in their sleep.

She went on after awhile and talked about how she didn't know what love is, and how she'd never experienced true love. She said many an interesting things, which I filed away in that cabinet I call my brain.

Another entertaining incidence was at 5:30 A.M. She rolled over and said, "I'm gonna go cook you breakfast sweetheart! That way you'll still love me." I stopped her and said something that I honestly don't remember, and she said, "Nonsense, if you stop me the fairies will get angry at you, and then what would we do?" It was pretty entertaining. I remember laughing a little, but perhaps I was also a little bit nervous.

The most deep and moving of all the comments, the one that scared me the most, the one that touched me the most, the one that burned deep inside of me as the sum of all my fears. She said quietly, "I don't think the angels will want me.", then once again, "I hope the angels will take me." That struck me deep down, it was hard to contain a lot of the emotions I was feeling. All I could really say was, "You already are an angel, Liz.", and "Of course they'd take you, you're so beautiful." I really couldn't think of much else to say, I was in a little state of emotional shock. Nonetheless, I continued to comfort her.

At around 6:30, she rolled onto me. Now that I think about it, I remember her saying I was cold and rolling onto me. It was really pleasant; the heat of her body kept me warmer than my blankets were. It was also nice to be that close to her.

At 7:00, she stroked me hair. I'd fallen asleep with her rolled onto my side. She kissed me and suffered my morning breath - a brave woman indeed, but then took my hands and told me she had a doctors appointment. At first I thought she was still dreaming, and told her to relax, to calm down, and then I realized that she was actually more conscious than before by the way she was kissing me. I kissed her for a little, then she got up, and I walked her out the door.

If anything ever happens to her, or should she survive, I'm going to write an article about the emotions I've experienced as this awesome girl's boyfriend. I'm not the pious type necessarily, but all that's left for me to do is have faith. To pray. To finally believe in God and that everything that's happening here, and to her, is all for a reason that he decided long before I was brought onto this Earth.

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