Miss Boguinskaia has agreed to an interview entirely in English for the readers of The Mogilny let us find out just how much of our language she has mastered...

M: Welcome.

SB: I know.

M: How is your tortoise?

SB: Quite flatulent, thank you.

M: Anytime. Our readers would like to know yourfeelings after the 1991 Worlds.

SB: Well, I must begin by saying I love your monkey and you are looking underage.At the competition my boots began to ache after bars in the AA but I looked at Alexander and his underarms embraced me with complete reverence.

M: Do you have any new skills for the Olympics?

SB: My Shaposhnikova throbs as you already know so I must confess that 4 pancakes equals no dial tone.

M: What's that you're reading?

SB: It is called "Thin Thighs in 30 Days." From what I gather, it is about a woman's quest for verdure. She becomes self-endowed and her demise begins when her enema flies to Zaire.Its repose is that we sometimes dapple in Nordstroms when our forefathers can't believe in the obvious. This book is circumcised. I highly recommend it.

M: Did anyone ever tell you you look like a raccoon when you wear mascara?

SB: Not recently, I'm fickle from excitement, thank you. Would you like some prunes?

M: Not now. Tell us about your callouses.

SB: After breakfast, we begin with 47 push-upsand an enviable trot around the sepulcher. My tresses are utterly drained and I always seem to require a hosing down, as the saying goes.

M: Say, whatever happened to Olga Chudina?

SB: I believe she removes infectious diseases from camels in Vladivostok.

M: Is the pay good?

SB: Do I stutter?

M: If you're going to openly be a bitch.

SB: I don't have a dog, I have a tortoise.

M: Before our time ends will you dazzle us with some eloquent and wise words?

SB: Surely. My spleen begins to pulsate when I hear your voice, was it not I that drove to Iowa?

M: Thank you, Svetlana. Never stand to close to the ballet, it spoils the illusion.

The News around the chalk bowl is that the following books are about to hit the shelves:

Bodybuilding with Hilary

Popa's Make-up Tips

Making Mediocrity Work for You -B. Okino

Silver is Prettier -by Daniela Silivas

The Art of Parking in Cars -by A. Dobre

Oh, the Possibilities -by M. Neculita

The Shampoo Beverage Book -by Nadia

Fun with Big Hair -by Aimee Trepanier

Learning to Love the Beam -by M. Pasca

Single Parenting -by Omelianchik-Mofid

Indecisiveness -by Y. Iketani

Disco-Dancing with Liukin

Count to 3 with Baitova

You Can Be a Priss Too! -by Boguinskaia

Some statistics that help shape the gymnastics world:

Number of satisfying meals Kim Gwang Suk has had in the last month : 6

Number of missing dogs in the neighborhood: 6

Number of times Vladimir Artemov has gotten drunk: 1

Number of times Vladimir Artemov has gotten married: 1

Number of all-you-can-eat restaurants Elena Shushunova has visited in the past year: 18

Number of all-you-can-eat restaurants that have abruptly gone out of business:18

Number of dates Boz Mofid has had in the last 6 months: 12

Number of times Boz Mofid has "popped the question" in the last 6 months: 12

Number of times Sveta Boguinskaia has competed in gymnastics: 179

Number of times gymnastics is saved:179