Rude man

Warning--Potentially Insulting to B'nei Akiva

>Wow, could it be BA would actually come through for us? Could it be?

Rude man

The next week, Oded came back, as promised. We were all a bit excited, we all had the chance to go to Jerusalem, we had all heard the rumor that we were going to Machon Meir. Oded had brought some of the higher ups with him, and they were talking outside. Suddenly Tzviker ran into the room. Tzviker, who was our madrich at this place, was probably the best madrich I've had, one who really looked out for us.

"Listen, I was just listening to Oded, and the man is a big snake. This is what he's going to do; he's going to come in here, and give you all the choice of either staying here, or B, accepting this other place. But he won't tell you where the other place is." C'mon the guy couldn't be that bad. I mean he doesn't exactly appear to be a mench, but we got rid of Gilad, surely this guy wouldn't pull such a low one.

So, he walked into the room followed by his entourage of B'nei Akiva up and ups. "Good morning. How are you? Do you like it here? Have you given it a shot? OK, well, here's what we're going to do. I have found a yeshiva that is willing to accept you. You have to pass a test, that not all of you will be able to pass. If you fail the test, you have to go back to the kibbutz instead, and work. OK? Do you want to do that and stay here"

"Well, where is it?"

"I've told you everything you need to know."

"No, we want to know where it is."

"What difference does it make?"

"A lot. One, is how close we are to other people, another is what there is to do on nights off, where we can get food, etc."

"I've told you all that you need to know."

"You told us that you'd come back with the name of a place to go to. Are you ..."

"I lied. I like to lie." A lot of the guys got angry at that one. It didn't phase me that much. My father used to say that to me when I was younger. It's just another way of saying "so sue me." (hmm...)

When all else fails... "Well is it in Jerusalem? It's a bigger commandment to study in Jerusalem."

"Oh please. I'm telling you all that you need to know."

Commercial break:

OK, we now return...

OK, that didn't work, so I tried again. "Look, I think it's important to know. Last time you stuck us out here in the middle of occupied territory, in the middle of the West Bank. How do we know you're not sending us to Iraq?"

He didn't understand what he was saying, and he needed a higher up in BA to explain it to him. Then he glared at me. "You are very rude. We have spent all week looking for a place for you guys. Now..."

"Right, and where did you say that was again?" This was going well. The entire group was getting into it.

"I've told you all I am going to tell you."

"OK, what will be studying there?"

"I've told you need to know. Now..."

"Well, what's on the tests?"

"Look, you all are adults now. You have two alternatives. I'll give you five minutes to think it over."

Excuse me...WHAT?!?!

OK, he left the room. A few guys went out to try to squeeze some blood out of the stone. He picked up a two by four and started playing with in a menacing way, as if to dare anybody else to confront.

To make the story interesting, the room we were put into had a phone in it. So we phoned everybody who might be able to give them any information. They called the head of B'nei Akiva, Schtiglitz, first. He was "in a meeting."

"We understand that, but it's very important...yes, we understand, but your boss promised us after the time he left us desolated in the middle of Jerusalem for seven hours, that we could call him any time....I see, well make sure he calls us back."

Commercial break:

OK, we now return...

Then they tried the offices back in England. No response. Then I called my madricha, Devorah, and she wasn't there. We even tried Gilad. He had no clue as to what we were talking about.

So, he comes back after fifteen minutes. We were still calling. W had even called him, on hi cellphone, trying to get an answer. It turns out that we were under strict orders not to find out. "Nu, where do you guys want to go?"

"We need more time." He was very upset about this. He made that abundantly clear. He said that he had thought that we were mature adults, and a such, we should be able to come to a decision.

Add to the list of the wonderful morals imparted by B'nei Akiva:

Russian Roulette is adult behavior.
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Michael Kadish

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