Malcolm X

A great deal of the time that I worked was spent in the dates. The date fields, the ones that you eat, not go out on date dates. But it was a lot of fun. Seriously, it was. I always enjoyed working there. On the days when a holiday would start that night, we had a lot of extra help. This was because the kids got out of school early, and the parents didn't have anything to do with them. So, while I was working with dates, I also got to work with kids. Not too shabby.

The kids were a little spoiled, they didn't want to work that hard...but they were kids. They were at the age without much of an attention span. No big deal. So I talked to them while we worked. I, in my American Hebrew, them in there grade school English. They started date fights, throwing them at each other. I discovered that Israelis cannot throw to save their life. It's sad. So, with my immature gentleman attitude, I pegged the boys, every time they pegged a girl. They worked harder when they saw that the normal workers were not going to do all the work themselves.

Anyway, the teachers brought the kids out, and apparently they treated this like a cheap field trip. The teachers were trying to incorporate some sort of educational merit to this. First they tried to teach them a song. "�� ��, {ma zeh} (What is it) 'come Mr. Tallyman, tally me bananas?" I actually knew this song. I tried to teach this to them ^which was a fun task in and of itself.^

"Deeyo..."

" ��... ��, ���� �� 'dayo'" {mmmm, lo, hamilah zeh 'dayo'} (uhm, no, the word is 'dayo.')

"�����, ��� ��� ���� �����, �� ���� ���� 'dayo'" {Slicha,aval ani medaber ivrit lo shamati hamilah 'dayo'} (Sorry, but I speak Hebrew. I haven't heard the word 'Dayo.')

"����� ��? �� ��� ��� ����. " {Yoda'at ma? Gam lanu ayn hamila.} (You know what? We also don't have the word.) So, after I tried to explain that to them, they tried to get me to sing it. I told them I can't sing. They begged me. OK, I sang. I got up to "work all night for a drink of rum," when the teacher said she was unaware that that was in the song, and the whole thing dies after that.

Commercial break:

But as I said before, this was a field trip. The teachers told the kids how they should dress. They all wore summer clothes, hats, sneakers, and most had shades or gloves. It was the hats that fascinated me though. The kid doesn't know where Charlotte is, he doesn't know what a hornet is, but he wears it, 'cause it's basketball.

So what, right?

OK, a girl had on an "X" cap.

(pausing to let the listener picture this twelve year old Jewish girl wearing an "X" hat.)

So, I tried to explain who this guy was. Of all the kids, only one, somewhat understandably, had heard of MLK. So, I explained everything about the man formerly known as Malcolm Little. From the autobiography to "Peace be unto you, and unto you be peace," to the movie. After all of this, she asks, " �� ��� ��� ������� ���?" {Az who haya antishemi, o lo?} (So, he was an antisemite, or no?)

Well, he was, well, he wasn't, he didn't like whites in general, I mean he wasn't Farrakkan, but he wasn't thrilled with my type anyway, but then at the end he became passive, and was nice and all, but he did hate us, well not us persay, but whites, though almost all Jews or whites...

"uhmmm...yes, yes he was."

Look, all I'm saying is that I think we should know what we are advertising.

Get me outa here!!!

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Michael Kadish

The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

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