& Over the Hill?& Over the Hill?
Ok, I admit it. Forty sucks! I have never paid any attention to age at all. I wasn't even phased at 30 or even 39. No wonder that's when Jack Benny stopped counting. There's something about forty! I could not get it out of my mind. I tried all kinds of thoughts to convince myself it was no big deal, including "Life begins at forty", "Time is not real thus age isn't either", "Four is the number for Angels","With age comes wisdom" etc. Nothing worked. "Is this something I really want to celebrate?", I thought.
My plan was to go to Atlantic City on Monday & visit with some friends there on Tuesday, my birthday. I decided to leave Sunday night instead since I was already in Manhattan with my "Course in Miracles" class. I arrived late in the evening & checked into the Atlantic Palace with a beautiful panoramic view of the ocean & Bally's, whose lights cover the entire building in all kinds of interesting patterns. It is one of the most unique buildings in the world. After having some Chinese food delivered to my room, I fell asleep listening to the ocean waves.
The next day the heavy rain & rough ocean made the view mesmerizing. It was a perfect setting for reflecting. For days I was asking the universe questions & now it seemed to have the chance to answer. A sense of peace came over me as I listened. The message wasn't clear at first, but I knew an answer was coming. It always does. Before I knew it, the day was almost over as it was approaching 11pm. By that time I was quite hungry & decided to go downstairs for some pizza. When I got outside, the boardwalk was misty & desolate. Nothing seemed to be open so I headed toward the closest casino, the Sands.
When I got there I remembered receiving a promotion from them offering me $10 at any slot machine. I inserted my card in one of the machines but a balance of zero appeared. Just then an older man came by & told me to try the adjacent machine. When I did that, the $10 appeared. At his suggestion I also checked for a food balance, which was $15. I was surprised enough receiving the cash, but had no idea they would include food also, since I rarely visit this casino. I took the $10 out of the machine & headed towards the buffet. When I got upstairs, the only thing open was the coffee shop. I saw a few people eating there, but otherwise it was pretty quiet.
After standing at the cashier for a few minutes as others came & went, I was beginning to feel invisible. Just then a woman seemed to appear from nowhere & said "Follow me please." She led me into the huge buffet room, filled with all kinds of Hollywood props from it's "Epic" motion pictures. All the buffet stations were empty & the place was totally deserted. Before she disappeared I managed to order a lox omelet & ask her if I could sit at the larger adjacent table. After she replied "That's not my station", I was sure 'my' station was the SCI-FI channel & "The Twilight Zone" was playing. I decided to move to the larger table in the other direction, so I would be in her section. I wondered where my food was going to come from, since the waitress left the area. For several minutes I sat alone in this quiet "museum". When I finally observed the view, it was like looking at a synopsis of my spiritual symbols.
On one side was a large Sphinx with an Ibis (bird) head. Above me was an Egyptian fan consisting of large beige feathers. On the other side were 2 winged lions. Across from me was a huge bell. Names of people I met on my spiritual path were popping out of posters along the wall. The seat I was sitting in was the only one that had such a view. Now I knew why I wasn't allowed to sit at the other table.
As I sat there absorbing all of this, I looked at my watch. That is when I realized what was happening. In a few short minutes, I was going to be 40. This was the universe's gift to me & reminded me that I am never alone & that anything is possible. The broken slot machine, the older man, the food money, the closed buffet, the waitress, & the symbols were all a part of this gift.
When midnight arrived the waitress reappeared with my food, & alot of other people. I don't know who they were or where they came from. A boy who looked liked a younger version of myself sat at my original seat. Not wanting to leave, I ordered a fancy sundae that wasn't even put on my bill. Nobody knew it was my birthday, just the universe, & it was throwing me a great party.
When I got back to my room I turned on the TV. An episode of "Touched by an Angel" was playing. The main character was celebrating his birthday. He had angels at his party also.
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