This chapter is dedicated to Sharon, for the sole purpose of
annoying her.  ^^

A little vocab:

Iie, chigaimasu:  "No, you're wrong."
konnichiwa:  good afternoon
sempai:  boyfriend (in this situation)
ne:  right?

I also used the Japanese attack names.

Previous disclaimers apply.  As for the rating, Mandy says it's PG,
but Mandy also has a tendency towards exaggeration...  ^^   Though I
will give you a corny joke warning.  ^_~

====================================================================

Chapter Five

	Usagi stared out the car window at the darkening sky. The
atmosphere matched her mood.  She had been at home for over a month
now and had barely left her residential walls any during that time.
There was just too much work involved, in transporting her and the
wheelchair, and in finding places to go where her chair would not be
too cumbersome to her.  They had found this last one out the hard
way when Usagi's mother tried to take her to a nearby clothing shop,
and her chair wouldn't fit between any of the racks.  That had been
embarrassing enough, as her mother had had to leave her in the
center store aisle.  Still, most people had been courteous at her
predicament and walked around her. One particular woman though, who
from the looks of it was having a bad hair day, had almost run into
her and then proceeded to yell at her for blocking the aisle.  It
hadn't even been Usagi's fault...the woman hadn't been watching
where she was going.  She had stormed of in a huff, without even
apologizing to Usagi for almost knocking her over. Ikuko had been
furious at the woman and apologized profusely to her daughter, who
had been gracious about the incident, but it had, in fact, mortified
her.  Since then there had been far fewer field trips from her house.
	Therefore when she was able to finally leave, she would have
appreciated a little enthusiasm, especially from HIM. She glanced
over at Mamoru.  He stared forward through the windshield stoically,
not taking his eyes off the road for one instant.  Usagi's parents
had agreed to let her go visit some of her friends, instead of the
other way around for once, and Mamoru had volunteered to drive.
Usagi had chattered happily for the first few minutes of the ride to
Rei's shrine, but had finally fallen silent when she had barely
gotten a response.  It was obvious that Mamoru was in a bad mood for
some reason, and his apparent apathy both simultaneously worried and
angered her.  She stared into Mamoru's eyes again.  In spite of his
concentration, he seemed distracted by something.
	"Mamo-chan, what's wrong?"  she asked.
	He startled, giving her a surprised glance. "Nothing, Usa,"
he mumbled without feeling.  'Nothing that a little study won't
cure...'
	"But you seem worried," she said.
	"Just because I'm not talking as much as usual?" he said.
'I don't want to talk about it.'
	"Ah, so you've noticed it too!"  Usagi teased, trying to
draw a smile out of him in vain.
	"I'm just tired," Mamoru said emotionlessly.  Usagi agreed
with him though; he did have circles under his eyes and a worn
expression on his face.
	"Why?"  she asked innocently.
	"Because I've been staying up late to study, OK?" he said,
irritability creeping into his voice.  He inwardly winced. 'Don't
take it out on her.  It's not her fault...not exactly.'
	"Mamo-chan, you shouldn't do that," Usagi reproached.  "You
need your rest."
"Well would you rather me flunk out of college?" he said in a short
tone.
	Usagi's face held a shocked expression.  "I'm just trying to
help," she said in a small voice.  She blinked back tears. 'What's
wrong?'
	Mamoru immediately regretted his outburst.  "I'm sorry,
Usako," he apologized.  "I'm more irritable when I'm sleep-deprived,"
he explained sheepishly.  'But that's no excuse for making you feel
bad,' he inwardly chided himself.
	Usagi furrowed her brow worriedly.  "Are your classes too
hard for you?" she asked.  "You never seemed to have trouble before."
	"I've just had other things on my mind..." he said vaguely.
	Usagi persisted.  "Like what?"
	"Well...you're never far from my mind," he covered, trying
to make amends for his previous animosity.
	"Mamo-chan..." Usagi had stars in her eyes.
	"Yes, and I get so tired because I'd rather think of you
than do my homework."  He smiled when Usagi giggled.
	"That's sweet, Mamo-chan," she said.
	Encouraged by her happiness, Mamoru kept going.  "And your
face is so much prettier than my professor's, I'd rather visit you
than go to class."
	"I love you Mamo-chan." Usagi sighed happily. 'He's so silly.
He's just trying to make me feel better.  He wouldn't let his
schoolwork suffer because of me...'   Her eyes widened as a memory
struck her.  '...or would he?'
	It was her welcome home party, a month ago.  About halfway
through the party she happened to glance at the clock--it had been
3:30.  She had whispered to him, "I thought you had a class at
three?"  He had whispered back, "You're more important."  She hadn't
thought much of it at the time, but...come to think of it, when he
left he had mentioned that he had missed class, as well.
	Now that she was thinking about it, there were other clues.
Visiting hours at the beginning of her hospital stay had been
inconvenient for a college student, yet he had still been there.
How many times had he missed class since then?  And whenever she had
asked how school was going, he had always mumbled a quick "fine" and
then changed the topic.
	'Mamoru's not joking,' she suddenly realized.  She *was* the
one causing him trouble.  Her and her stupid disability.  All the
visits, all the phone calls...had distracted him from his schoolwork.
He was just too nice to admit it to her.  She had tried the best she
could from adding any extra trouble to any of her friends, but she
must have failed.  Her heart suddenly felt ten times heavier with
guilt.
	"I'm glad to know you care that much..." she whispered out
the window, letting a tear slip down her cheek.  'Mamo-chan, I
didn't know I was such a nuisance...' She fell silent.
	Mamoru couldn't see her tears.  But he instinctively knew
that something was troubling her, confusing since he had thought he
was cheering her up.
	"Usagi, do you need to talk about anything?" he asked.
	Usagi sat still for a minute, not wanting to answer. Her
thoughts were in turmoil, as she contemplated her options.  It
was one thing for her to be a slacker in school.  That was almost
to be expected by now.  But Mamoru...he was different.  He was
smart, he was diligent;  he wanted to be a doctor and he had the
drive to do it.  And now his dream was in jeopardy, all because
of her.  If this was really the case, there was only one thing to
do...but it would practically kill her to do it.  Desperately
she searched for an alternative but could find none.  Finally
she sighed and said softly, "It's because of me."
	"What?"  Mamoru had no clue what she was talking about.
	"You're doing poorly because of me.  And this stupid
wheelchair," she said in a hurt voice.  'I never wanted to cause
anyone else pain because of me.'
	"Usagi!  What?  No, I didn't say that," Mamoru said
forcefully.
	"I don't want your schoolwork to suffer because of me, Mamo-
chan," she said, ignoring him.  After a few more moments of
deliberation she came to a difficult decision.  It made her sick to
her stomach as she said, "I...I didn't know.  I don't think you
should see me any more until you catch up."
	"*WHAT!*"  Mamoru practically slammed on the brakes.
Thankfully he was on a suburban road, so no one was behind him, or
surely he would have caused an accident, considering his state of
mind at the moment.  "Usagi..."
	"Keep driving," she said.  "It won't help matters any if you
get hurt too."  She  added to herself, 'Besides, I don't think I
could stand that.'
	Mamoru silently cursed.  'Of all the times for her to get a
good work ethic...'  As if the pressures of school weren't bad
enough, now Usagi was trying to take away the one bright spot in his
life.
	"Usagi," he tried again, "it's not your fault.  It's mine.
I'm sure I'll catch up soon.  I...I just need to prioritize better."
	Usagi almost started crying again.  "Right.  Mamoru, I'm not
your first priority.  Your classes are.  I don't want to be a
burden."
	'I can't believe I'm saying this,' she thought.  'I want
you here, but you have to do what's best for you,' she silently told
him.
	"You could never be a burden," he said.  "I *want* to be here
for you."
	"But it's not your responsibility..."
	"But I want it to be."
	She smiled at him through her tears.  "Thank you Mamo-chan,"
she said, and his heart lifted, then immediately crashed again as
she added, "but I can't let you ruin your GPA because of me.
Besides, my dad would never let me date someone who flunked out of
college," she said, only half-joking.  "After today..." she
swallowed hard, "I don't want you to come visit me until you bring
your grades back up."
	Mamoru felt sick.  "I don't know if I can do that."
	"Please."
	"We'll...we'll talk about it later," he said in a strained
voice.  The turn of events made him upset and frustrated at the same
time.  Suddenly he slammed his palm on the steering wheel, and Usagi
looked at him in shock. "I knew I never should have brought it up,"
he said angrily.
	"Iie, chigaimasu. You should have," Usagi said, a trace of
irritation in her voice as well.  He was acting unreasonable;  she
knew she was in the right, no matter how much it hurt.  "I would
have felt worse if you hadn't mentioned it."
	"But it's none of your concern!" Mamoru yelled. Usagi gaped
at him, unbelieving.  Her eyes began filling with tears.  'Uh-oh.
Now I've really done it,' he thought frantically.
	"I didn't  know you felt that way," Usagi said in a
strangled voice.  "Fine, I won't bother you about your personal life
ever again."
	She stared out the window for the umpteenth time.  The
atmosphere in the car suddenly became very stifling.  Mamoru sighed.
	"Usagi, no, I didn't mean it that way...." he pleaded.
Usagi kept her back turned and shoulders stiff.  "Usako, listen to
me..."  She placed her hands over her ears.
	"Darn it Usagi, quit acting so childish!" he said.  Evidently
she didn't cover her ears well enough, because she promptly bent over
and started sobbing even harder, once she heard his words.  'Rats.
This is getting worse and worse...' he thought.
	"You think I'm a child," she said tearfully.
	"No, I don't..."
	"Do too."
	"No, Usagi, I...I..."
	"Just SHUTTUP!" she yelled, going from hurt to angry at his
stubbornness.
	Mamoru didn't think he had heard correctly.  "Excuse me?"
	"I said shut up.  I don't want to hear anymore."  She kept
her back turned.  'You're not being fair.'
	"Well, fine then," Mamoru, suddenly exasperated at the
conversation.  "Don't let me explain.  I don't care."
	"Me neither."
	"Well, good since I didn't want to anyway."
	"Good, 'cause I didn't want to hear it."
	"Good."
	"Good!"
	"GOOD!."
	"*HMPH*!"
	They stared out their respective windows...Usagi watching
the passing neighborhoods listlessly, Mamoru trying to pay attention
to the road, though not succeeding very well.  His head was still
swimming with the unexpected fight.  The rest of the drive passed in
an awkward, angry silence.
	Finally they arrived at to the shrine. 'And not a moment too
soon,' they both thought in relief.  Mamoru parked on the curb and
went to get her wheelchair.  He rolled it to the passenger side door
and prepared to carefully help Usagi out of the car.
	"Don't," she said crossly.
	"What?  You have to get out," he just as irritably.
	"I want Yuuchiro to help me."  Stubbornly she refused him
again.
	"Usagi!"  Mamoru was really starting to get annoyed.
	"Makoto can too, if she's here," she said, ignoring him.  He
decided to reply in kind and reached down to pick her up.
	"Mamoru, let go!" she said angrily.
	"No!" he said, and promptly transferred her from the car to
the chair.  Usagi had no choice but to allow it.  She crossed her
arms and blinked back tears.  Mamoru had no way of knowing that this
move hurt her the most of the entire argument.  It was just another
reminder of how helpless she was.  She had made great progress in PT,
but it would be a long time before she was as independent as she
used to be.  It was bad enough to be reminded of this in the small
things of her everyday life, like needing help from her mother to
get dressed, but to have Mamoru just rub it in her face like this...
that was just too much.  Tears starting streaming down her face, but
this time she determined to cry silently, so that Mamoru wouldn't
know the pain he was causing her.
	'He's not worth it,' she thought angrily, then inwardly
sighed.  'Yes, he is.  Mamo-chan, why does it have to be this way?
You're as stubborn as I am.'
	They both had a door shut and saw Rei hurry down the walk.
"Konnichiwa," she began, then stopped upon seeing Usagi's tears.
She froze in the middle of the walk.  "Are you OK?"
	Usagi sighed.  "I'm fine."  Mamoru looked at her
tear-streaked face and felt another wave of guilt wash over him.  He
couldn't mention it though, or Usagi would think she had won.  Rei
looked unsure of what to say to the two.
	"Really, Rei-chan, don't worry about me," Usagi said, wiping
her eyes and smiling up at her friend.
	"OK," Rei said, though she didn't look as though it was OK
with her.  She didn't push the issue though.  "Well.... you're the
first person here."
	"That's a first in itself," Usagi laughed.  Rei wanted to
join her, but something inside of her held back.
	"Mamoru must have been the one who got you here early," Rei
ventured, and was startled to hear Usagi snort.
	"Or his speeding..." Usagi muttered.
	"Do you have a problem with my driving?" Mamoru asked testily.
He thought she was being ridiculous, but wisely kept that thought to
himself.
	"Only the fact that you never seemed to have learned how,"
she retorted even as she wondered why she was going to such great
lengths to provoke him.
	"I wouldn't talk, seeing as you don't even *know* how!" he
fired back.
	Rei gaped at this new development.  This was not good...
Usagi and Mamoru  didn't usually fight about petty stuff, and
definitely not in front of others.  'They sound like Usagi and I
used to,' she thought, not even realizing that she placed her
thought in the past tense.  She decided to play the peacemaker for
once.  'In her condition, Usagi doesn't need the added stress.'
	"Usagi, did you want to come in and wash your face?" she
asked, trying to divert their attention from the argument.
	"Why, does it need it?" Usagi transferred her wrath to Rei,
giving her the evil eye.  Rei felt a jab at her heart.
	"No," she almost squeaked, then coughed to cover it up.
"Umm...well, maybe a little," she admitted.
	Usagi was mildly exasperated at Rei's behavior.  'You don't
have to treat me with kid gloves, Rei,' she thought.    But she
knew that Rei was trying her best to help her in the only way she
knew how, so she was touched by Rei's concern.
	"All right," she acquiesced. "Lead the way." She started
to roll forward, then stopped halfway up the walk.  "Um, Rei...
would it be asking too much for you to just bring me a washcloth
out here?"  she asked.  'I bet she thinks I'm lazy.'
	"Why?" Rei was puzzled.
	Usagi nodded towards the shrine's elevated steps.  "It would
just be easier than having to go up and down the steps."
	Rei felt extremely guilty.  She had never considered how
Usagi would go up the shrine's steps.  "Of course," she said.  "I'm
sorry." She rushed inside, berating herself.  'I was trying to take
her mind off things.  All I succeeding in doing was reminding her of
her injury.'
	Usagi was a lot more forgiving of Rei than Mamoru, though.
They stayed silent, looking away from each other as soon as Rei left.
Mamoru wandered a couple of feet away and started inspecting a cherry
tree, acting as if it were the most interesting thing in the world.
Usagi was more honest about her emotions and just crossed her arms and
moped.  Thankfully Rei returned fairly soon with a damp washcloth.
She handed it to Usagi awkwardly.
	"Thanks, Rei-chan," Usagi said gratefully, taking it from her.
She washed her face, reveling in the feeling of the warm water on her
skin.  "That does feel so much better."
	"Don't mention it."  Rei was slightly appeased.  'At least I
did one thing right.'