The Art Museum

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Marge leads the family through an art gallery. Homer, hands in his pockets,

is bored and annoyed. So is Bart. Lisa seems interested, though. Maggie

just falls.

Marge:

I've always wanted to introduce you kids to the world of art.

It's so enriching!

Bart:

[raises his hand] I have an announcement to make: I'm bored.

Homer:

Well, maybe we're all bored Bart, but we're going to cooperate anyway.

Lisa:

Yeah, Bart.

Bart:

Oh, brother.

Marge:

Now, over here...

Bart turns his head and his eyes pop wide up.

Bart:

Ay, Carumba!

Homer:

Bart!

Bart:

Whoooooooooooooooa, momma!

Homer:

Bart!

We see what has got Bart's attention: A painting of a nude.

Bart:

[growls] Now what I call the enriching world of ar...

Homer covers Bart's mouth and eyes, then sees the painting.

Homer:

Not bad, not bad at a...

Marge angrily covers Homer's mouth and eyes. Meanwhile, Lisa and

Maggie admire a male nude statue's butt.

Marge leads the family through an exhibit of ancient artifacts.

Marge:

Let's try for a little dignified behavior. This an art museum.

Homer:

She's right, you little slobs.

Marge indicates an exhibit. In the background, a large urn totters on its

pedestal as Lisa's arms reach out towards it. Homer's eyes bug out.

Marge:

Now here, we have some...

Homer:

Lisa!

Lisa:

Aaaagh!

Lisa covers her mouth in fright as the urn tips off its pedestal.

(*whoosh*) Maggie zips in and catches it.

Bart's head pops out of the urn.

Bart:

Well, that was close. When do we go home and watch TV?

Homer pounds his fist into his hand.

Homer:

Bart...

Bart:

Careful, Dad...

Bart ducks back into the urn.

Bart:

This thing's priceless!

Driving home.

Homer:

[angrily] This is the time I take you kids to the art museum.

Bart:

Don't have a cow, Dad.

Lisa:

Yeah, Dad.

Homer:

Why you little...

Marge:

Now calm down, Homer.

The kids just aren't mature enough yet to appreciate fine art.

Bart:

Au contraire, Mom.

Lisa:

We find the world of art quite enriching.

Bart holds up a nude.

Bart:

As a matter of fact, I'm thinking of becoming a collector.

Homer turns around, sees the painting, and shrieks.

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