| |||
| Lisa and Maggie sit at the kitchen table. (There is a one-eared rabbit | |||
| doll on the table in front of Lisa, and a smaller two-eared variety in | |||
| front of Maggie.) Bart walks in, hiccuping. | |||
| Lisa: | Look, Nurse Maggie, our new patient. | ||
| Bart: | [moans] [in pain] I've got the hiccups, and I've got 'em bad... [moans] | ||
| Lisa produces a blender. | |||
| Lisa: | Nurse Maggie, begin preparation of the secret hiccup elixir. | ||
| As Lisa calls out each ingredient, Maggie slides it down the table, | |||
| and Lisa empties the bottle/jar/can into the blender. Bart can only | |||
| watch, fearing the worst. (Hiccuping occasionally.) | |||
| Lisa: | Milk... Ice cream... Maple syrup... Cream of broccoli [splort]... | ||
| Hot sauce. | |||
| Lisa puts the top on the blender and turns it on. | |||
| Bart: | No way, man! | ||
| Maggie comes up behind Bart and yanks his head backwards, forcing | |||
| his mouth wide open. Lisa empties the entire brownish-purple contents | |||
| of the blender into Bart's mouth. Maggie lets go, and Bart's head | |||
| snaps back into place. | |||
| Bart: | [moan] [burp] | ||
| Bart collapses on his back. (*hiccup*) | |||
| Lisa: | I knew it. Not enough hot sauce. | ||
| (*hiccup*) | |||
| Lisa: | Climb into the treatment apparatus, please. | ||
| Lisa stands by a swivel chair in the living room. Bart stands (*hiccup*) | |||
| in front of the chair, and Maggie shoves him into the seat. The girls | |||
| grab a hold of the chair and give it a huge spin. (Maggie falls in the | |||
| process.) | |||
| Lisa: | [whispers] Confidentially, Nurse Maggie, this treatment has occasional | ||
| side-effects. | |||
| The girls stop the chair from spinning. Bart, clearly disoriented, moans | |||
| and hiccups out of the chair and staggers all around the room. | |||
| Lisa: | [whispers] The side effects are somewhat entertaining, are they not, | ||
| Nurse Maggie? | |||
| Bart collapses. (*hiccup*) | |||
| Bart leans against the wall, still hiccuping. Lisa and Maggie stand | |||
| nearby, each touching their cheek with their right hand, and holding | |||
| their right elbow in their left hand. (Maggie is obviously mimicking | |||
| her older sister.) Throughout, Bart hiccups, moans, hiccups again, | |||
| moans again, etc. | |||
| Lisa: | I'm stumped, Nurse Maggie. This is the worst case of the hiccups | ||
| we've ever treated. | |||
| Maggie mimes her suggestion: She pulls her head back and pushes | |||
| up her hair into a likeness of Bart, and mimes being force-fed. | |||
| Then she takes her pacifier in her hand and spins it. Then she | |||
| pulls her hair back and contorts her face into a likeness of Homer. | |||
| Lisa: | That's it! A combination of our previous techniques, followed by | ||
| the scare treatment. It can't miss. | |||
| In the kitchen, Maggie pulls Bart's head back as Lisa pours the | |||
| elixir down his throat. | |||
| Back in the living room, the girls spin Bart (Maggie falls again), | |||
| and while Bart is spinning, Maggie produces a photo of Homer. Lisa | |||
| stops the chair, and Bart screams in fright when he sees the picture. | |||
| Lisa: | I pronounce this patient... cured! | ||
| Bart oozes to the floor and hiccups. | |||
| Back to episode list | |||