| The Minion (1998) Cast:Dolph Lundgren,Francoise Robertson Terrible movie about a warrior priest (Lundgren) who must keep the key that unlocks satan away from a demon trying to free him, in this awful rip off of Fallen and The Hidden. It also ranks as one of Lundgren's worst movies and boy does he have some contenders. The Minion starts off with a radio announcing that it is 76 degrees and that it is the warmest winter of all time, seems it is Christmas and all of this starts the film off with the dread that this movie is somehow going to be an end of the world thriller. Sadly the movie ends up being a hundred times worse then you could imagine. Dolph Lundgren plays a warrior priest and that of course is believable when compared to the next threads that follow. Indeed we start with a chamber where a skeleton with a sword and shield (With a cross on it, so automatically we assume they are crusaders) and its here where an archeologist (Played very unconvincingly by Robertson) discovers a key, to which a bald guy attacks her, to which Lundgren rescues her, suffice to say the movie is a seemingly endless parade of Lundgren and Robertson running away from this demon and of course spouting gibberish about christian mythology and would be zen that make this even dumber then it already is. . All of this would be passable had The Minion had some decent actionscenes but here too the movie comes up (very) short. For instance Lundgren has a sword fight with a templar who is like his equal but instead of actually putting up a decent fight, we get Lundgren and the other actor taking turns kicking each other's asses. Of course this defuses suspense and of course makes one ponder why such a travesty could get made. Also for a twelve million dollar movie, it looks incredibly cheap with sets that look as if they were bought from a 50's High school production of King Lear. For my money this is the.worst movie ever to come from Dolph Lundgren. (Update:Agent Red would be worse) Its just terrible. D.Jean-Marc Piche * |