Avril Lavigne...

Avril Lavigne. These two words, when used together, usually have one of two common reactions:

1) �Oh mah gawd! She�s so like talented and stuff! She plays guitar and like sings and stuff all at the same time, she�s so darned talented! Let�s go hang out at like the mall and stuff and wear ties and sideways hats just like Avril!�


2) �The next time I hear Sk8er Boi, I WILL hunt down and kill the man that �co wrote� the song with her.�

Avril Lavigne (which in french translates to April Lavigne�go figure�) is one of the latest singers to be catapulted into stardom by cashing into the �pop/punk� sound made so popular by acts like Blink 182, Jimmy Eat World (who are, in my opinion, more emo than punk but they get slapped into this category as well), New Found Glory, etc. To help in maintaining the �keeping it real� image that �the kids� relate to, many of these artists will choose to dress in what some would say is classified as skater wear, including pants that are large enough to smuggle immigrant children in, t-shirts that bear the logo of any of the various skate companies, and the ever-popular backwards/sideways hat. Most of the members of these bands actually do know how to skate, so this doesn�t bother me too much. It�s when a poser like Avril comes along that I take exception to. I can hear the 15 year old steel-mouthed girls yelling �Dave, you�re such an ass, she does skate! She�s awesome!� Then why, my magnetized mouthed little friend, did she frown at the chance to skate in her videos? When asked to do some simple skateboarding for the Complicated video, she quickly became defensive and stated �No dude, I suck!� Now far be it from me to dissect actions from a person who I don�t know personally, but if she�s so proud to be part of the skateboarding sub-culture and does contain the skating prowess that she claims to, shouldn�t she be thrilled to have the chance and the forum to show the entire world her best Tony Hawk pose? Or maybe I�m just full of shit. That�s quite possible and you readers wouldn�t be the first to point that out to me.

Then you have Avril�s image as a songwriter/guitar player. This is the image that attacks me most personally. Why you say? When asked in an interview with J-14 Magazine about her song-writing process, Avril stated that �Once I sit down with the guitar, I write about what I�m feeling that day.� Yet a contradicting statement was made in a Time magazine interview, when she was quoted as saying �(when writing) I sit down with a guitar player usually.� In the same J-14 interview, when asked about the songs on her album, she said �I wrote all those songs when I was sixteen.� Yet one look at her cd�s liner notes will tell you otherwise�every song on the Let Go album was co-written with a professional songwriter. She is also touted by her fans as a guitar playing virtuoso, much like Michelle Branch. However, if you�ve ever seen these two in concert, you�ll realize that this couldn�t be farther from the truth. When Avril can actually be bothered to pick up a guitar during her live show (which is usually only to perform one, MAYBE two songs), she feels the need to inform her audience that she sucks at playing. Yet she seems to rock pretty hard when she�s in the safe confines of a music video�hmmm�

Now, don�t get me wrong. I have to admit that she DOES have a couple of really frickin� catchy songs. Complicated seems to me to be a great song about maintaining images and fake people trying to be something they�re not, which I hate as well. Please keep this song�s lyrics in mind, cause we�re gonna be travelling back to them soon. Other songs like Sk8er Boi and My World are too damned easy to pick on lyrically, so I�ll leave them out of this fiasco. As I stated earlier, she and her band (and quite possibly a dozen or so music industry �professionals� forming her sound) do really know how to make a song with a hook and a beat, which is how songs like Sk8er Boi got popular to begin with. It definately wasn�t for the lyrics�to steal a quote from Rec Room Magazine in an article about Avril Lavigne:

�He was a boy, she was a girl
Can I make it any more obvious?

Well, you sure as hell couldn�t make it any more juvenile.�

That pretty much sums up my feelings.

I saved the best for last. Remember how I told you to remember the Complicated lyrics? Well, here�s where they come in handy. To quote Avril herself (or the writer that devised these lines):

�The way you�re actin� like you�re somebody else gets me frustrated�
�You�re tryin� to be cool, you look like a fool to me�

Hehe. Avril�sweet, sweet Avril�I believe this picture I recently acquired explains exactly what I was going to say in a lot less words:


Did I mention that I�ve gotten word from reliable sources that she used to sing country music before she turned her hat sideways? I admire her change in musical direction, as it�s never easy for an artist to take a complete 180 degree change in their sound, but it just seems to me that she changes her image/sound a little too easily for my likings. And don�t try to tell her she�s a pop star. In an interview with the National Post, �When it is suggested that even then her tastes were kind of pop-oriented, her head snaps up as though she's been slapped. 'New country,' she says, as though pop music is somehow less cool than new country. Then again, it seems any music is better than pop music in Lavigne's eyes. Later, when it is mentioned that she seems poised for pop stardom, she is quick to correct. 'No, no, no. Rock stardom,' she says forcefully. 'I don't like using the term pop star because that's not my personality. My personality is like a rock star. I'm hardcore.'" Uh�Avril�I don�t know what version of your album YOU�VE been listening to, but the one that I and the general public have been subjected to is little more than sugar-coated pop music.

I must say I do like the �I�m With You� when she gets hit in the head though. But maybe I�m full of shit.


I�d like to leave with a link to an article written by the previously mentioned Rec Room Magazine. I got inspiration for this rant from that article and wish to give it it�s due attention and admiration. http://www.recroommagazine.com/articles/avril.htm

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