Conversations, Reflections & Meditations


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Sign Guestbook \| View Guestbook Comments? Questions? [email protected]	Prayer topics Street Meeting Lord, Make Me a Titus 2:3-5 Woman My Plans and Ways, Child ...Thank You, Father Submitting to You - Giving Up Me Street Meeting Date: June 5, 2006 On Friday evening I went out for a walk and there were the old folks from the Holiness Movement just starting their street meeting. I have often thought of going, in the past, and even stopped to watch for a moment, but was embarrassed(!) and moved on. This time I very nervously (embarrassed again, sorry to say) stood off to the side and watched and listened, till a little elderly lady invited me to sit by here. There was a 40-something (I think) preacher with them, who loudly and powerfully preached a clear and simple gospel message. It was how I always imagined street preachers would preach! I wonder if I've seen this before, or if I've just heard/read stories about it? Anyway, someone passing by in a truck swore at him, and another car was sitting at the red light, and he loudly called out to them that God had brought them there for that moment. After he preached, the group sang "Amazing Grace" and I joined in. The little lady said I had a nice voice. She also said it was her first time there. There were a few other people who stopped and watched for a bit. I have always been amazed how these elderly folks (almost all old!) faithfully turn out all year round in all kinds of weather. Of course, I have been very impressed with the content of their little magazine. And Mrs. Whitehead spoke so powerfully - in the Spirit, for sure! - at our chapel that time. So I know they really love the Lord, and are truly willing to suffer for Him, to bring the gospel to the world! But up till now I have always been really nervous about hanging out with them, because they are "wierd" and I guess the fact is, I still care about what the world thinks! Well, maybe that is changing... thank You, Lord! (And please forgive me for taking so long to get here). Return to the top Lord, Make Me a Titus 2:3-5 Woman Date: June 5, 2006 Last Sunday _____ announced the new Sunday night series about living the Christian life, and also that the first 2 sessions would be "men only" about Christian leadership in the home (and church), and he asked the women to pray. I thought about that all week and finally emailed, and suggested that maybe there should be a couple of "women's only" sessions, taught by a mature, Godly wman, about submission and the role/position of Christian women in the home and the church. He emailed me back and said he had been praying that a woman would step forward and offer to do that, and he asked if I would. I emailed back and said "yes" as long as I could meet with him first to be sure we are on the same page/track. So I will be meeting with ____ to discuss this. Meanwhile I was looking through some books, and thinking about and learning more about the position and role of women. I have been finding myself more and more - finally - accepting (and being happy about!) the Biblical instructions/principles. I really was happy to realize the fact that we as women are protected, and saved from stress, when we allow men to take their rightful position. In the past year or so, as I have followed Pastor Alan's advice to me to love and respect my husband (and to act love even if I don't feel it), as well as _____'s spiritual influence, I have seen such amazing change and maturity in my husband. To think that it was me who was holding him back! And I didn't see it! I thought I had to "step into the gap" and take on his responsibility until he got around to it - but actually I was interfering, blocking his way, or at least letting him off. (Though I think I really was blocking and interfering!) Forgive me, Lord! Thank You for Your love and guidance. No wonder I have not been able to lead, minister, reach out, preach (yes, to women!), witness, be a Godly mother (oh, Lord, that too I was blocking!). I simply was not yet walking in Your positioning for me as a Christian woman. Partly, I have surely been influenced by the world's feminism and individualism, but of course I have also been full of personal pride and self-sufficiency and desire for power and control and worldly recognition! Oh, dear Father, please forgive me! .... I was looking at the website of that street preacher, and one thing that spoke to me was his writing on divorce. You spoke to me through that, Lord! You made me realize that I have always tried to shift the blame for my own divorce to my ex-husband (and slander him in the process)... and have not accepted that I, too - probably mostly, if not all! - am to blame! I was the one, after all, who ran out of the relationship (whatever my reasons might have been) and allowed myself to fall, in more ways than one, for another man. Lord, I was wrong, and I am wrong for continuing to deny my guilt! Please, Lord, forgive me. Thank You! I see that this is yet another crucial step it is absolutely necessary that I take, and another understanding that I must have, before I can preach to women and/or be in leadership, that is, be a Titus 2:3-5 woman. Until my life is purified, how can I dare to even think of pointing other women to You? Sure, You do use the gospel, even from people with wrong motives, but that is not Your preference, and oh, Lord, I only want what You want. I only want Your approval, I only want the glory to be given to You! So, dear Lord, I do repent of all my infidelity (adultery, and fornication before I was first married, and the abortion, too), and I ask You to cleanse me and use me and direct me according to Your will. In Jesus' name! Thank You, Lord. Lord, please use all You have been teaching me, to change and transform my life in practical ways - in my relations with my husband, my children, my family (parents, siblings, relatives - and my husband's relatives, too), my church, my friends, my neighbours - and all whom You would have me minister to. Oh Lord, please help me to truly submit to my husband, to truly be under his leadership (spiritual and temporal). Use me, Lord, as his helpmeet, in all the purposes You have for him. Up to now, Lord, it's all been "help me." But it must be "help him" - and me as his wife and helpmeet. Help me to always allow and place him in the front position of leadership and headship. Thank You, Lord, in Jesus' name. (Thank You for teaching me these things, Lord! Thank You for preparing me!) Return to the top My Plans and Ways, Child ...(Thank You, Father) Date: June 12, 2006 Dear Heavenly Father, Here I am. I hear You... ***** Norma, My child, I love you. Rest in Me. Walk in Me. Lean not to your own understanding. Acknowledge me. I do have a wonderful plan for you, but it will happen in My way and My time. Do not try to rush it. Do not try to hurry folks along. Do not try to "drop suggestions." To be in subjection means that you are willing - and eager! - to set aside all your own ambitions, desires, hope, dreams, willing to give them up entirely, let them be crushed and destroyed even, if need be, in order that a greater good - God's good - may grow, slowly move forward, as painfully gradual as the unfolding may seem, until all God's good purposes come together to burst forth in eternal perfection and completeness, for God's glory. Subjection is laying aside your own glory for the greater glory of God. It may entail giving up to God all that you hold dear - but the outcome is always infinitely worth it. It is what Paul meant when he wrote, "I count all things loss, that I may gain Christ..." Be willing to give it all up, My child. Be willing to do things totally My way. My ways are truly not your ways and My thoughts are not your thoughts. You do have some great ideas, even "Godly" ideas - but what you need to have are My ideas - alone. You must let Me have complete control of every aspect of your life. You must let go of any opportunities you think that you see to "work" for Me or to "honor" Me. I have plans you have never even dreamed of. I have ways - more often than not, ways that are spurned by the world as foolish, unpleasant, unfulfilling, unsuccessful - that yet will bring together all My children, My family, My church, into the one great glorious body of believers under the headship and Lordship of My precious Son, Jesus Christ. Yes, you could be a person of influence in "your church." You could "take over" the womens' leadership. You could "move things along." But - are you sure that is what I want for you? I do have under women in Abundant Life's body who I have also been preparing for works of mercy and grace - and leadership. I know. You are anxious. You want My work to quickly and effectively "go ahead." You see that I have been preparing you for service, yes, servant ministry, Child. Ministry in subjection to My will, My place, My time. Dear Child, My plans are never disappointing. Yes, they are humbling you, they require lowliness of position in the eyes of the world - and in the eyes of the "church," more often than not. Remember what Alan said to you about the quiet ones often having the most important ministries. Read again your message from my Micaiah servant: "You're always to quiet - it's so often that those who are quiet are the most active in ministry - in ways that no one but God sees, but that are most effective of all (I'm reminded of the life of 'Praying Hyde.')" Slow down, Child. Be quiet, and patient, and practice being subject to Me - and to your husband, and to the church leadership, and all. Be subject, too, to your parents. Just love them, and please them in this difficult time. You have asked me to have mercy on them, and encourage them, and to answer your dad's prayers for his family. Do You not see that I am answering those prayers by giving you the opportunity to live out My mercy and grace before them and to them? Yes, it is "too much" for you alone. But you are never alone. I am always with you. And My strength is made perfect in your weakness. I need you right now for things that seem "small" in the eyes of the world. But they are great and glorious things in My economy, in My eternal, perfect purposes. My purposes always prevail. But how much more glorious it is when My children allow Me to lead them in the way I would ahve them go, right from the start. Can you do that for Me? Will you? Will you will to follow My will, My ways, My thoughts? Will you accept My will as yours, give up all that you will, hope, dream; and become wrapped, enveloped, fulfilled in Me? Walk My path, Child - Trust Me completely, fully, no matter what. And I will direct your paths. (And fulfill your dreams - My dreams that are infinitely greater and more wonderful and perfect and of eternal consequence than any mere human dream, will become your dreams, too, and I will confirm and fulfill them). Yes, Child, I love you. You are Mine. As you walk subject to Me, You will also walk worthy of Me. it is what you want, what you long for, what only I can provide. Accept it, Child. Unreservedly. "All for Jesus... days and hours... hopes and dreams... life, death, eternity... all". ********** Amen. Thank You, Lord. Amen. Okay. Return to the top Submitting to You - Giving up Me Date: June 12, 2006 I have been kind of wondering, in a sort of hazy way, the past few days, about getting "tied down" into Abundant Life. So many things happening - the Friday night street meetings, and the Sunday meeting in the park, mom and dad's situation, bartering baby sitting for French learning with ____, even ____'s educational situation, the school not being "ready" in September - and the quite clear sense that I shouldn't take on extra teaching responsibilities. June 13, 2006 Thank You for Your word about my taking on "leadership." Lord, please raise up women who can do this - by Your strength and through Your Spirit. And please do the same for me in this teaching, and in whatever other places You want me. You know I've been feeling badly about my lack of submission. As I've studied for this teaching, I have become very convicted - well, shocked - at how unsubmissive I have been - and how little I "got" when I studied this topic before. I can sure see why You help me back! Please forgive me, and help me ask my husband for forgiveness, too. Thank You, Lord. Amen. (I love You, Lord!) Amen! Return to the top
Main Page \| My Articles for The Life Connection \| Prayers and Meditations \| Poetry Haida Gwaii Reflections \| Education & Home-School \| Family


	Main Page \| My Articles for The Life Connection \| Prayers and Meditations \| Poetry Haida Gwaii Reflections \| Education & Home-School \| Family
Sign Guestbook \| View Guestbook Comments? Questions? [email protected]	Prayer topics Street Meeting Lord, Make Me a Titus 2:3-5 Woman My Plans and Ways, Child ...Thank You, Father Submitting to You - Giving Up Me Street Meeting Date: June 5, 2006 On Friday evening I went out for a walk and there were the old folks from the Holiness Movement just starting their street meeting. I have often thought of going, in the past, and even stopped to watch for a moment, but was embarrassed(!) and moved on. This time I very nervously (embarrassed again, sorry to say) stood off to the side and watched and listened, till a little elderly lady invited me to sit by here. There was a 40-something (I think) preacher with them, who loudly and powerfully preached a clear and simple gospel message. It was how I always imagined street preachers would preach! I wonder if I've seen this before, or if I've just heard/read stories about it? Anyway, someone passing by in a truck swore at him, and another car was sitting at the red light, and he loudly called out to them that God had brought them there for that moment. After he preached, the group sang "Amazing Grace" and I joined in. The little lady said I had a nice voice. She also said it was her first time there. There were a few other people who stopped and watched for a bit. I have always been amazed how these elderly folks (almost all old!) faithfully turn out all year round in all kinds of weather. Of course, I have been very impressed with the content of their little magazine. And Mrs. Whitehead spoke so powerfully - in the Spirit, for sure! - at our chapel that time. So I know they really love the Lord, and are truly willing to suffer for Him, to bring the gospel to the world! But up till now I have always been really nervous about hanging out with them, because they are "wierd" and I guess the fact is, I still care about what the world thinks! Well, maybe that is changing... thank You, Lord! (And please forgive me for taking so long to get here). Return to the top Lord, Make Me a Titus 2:3-5 Woman Date: June 5, 2006 Last Sunday _____ announced the new Sunday night series about living the Christian life, and also that the first 2 sessions would be "men only" about Christian leadership in the home (and church), and he asked the women to pray. I thought about that all week and finally emailed, and suggested that maybe there should be a couple of "women's only" sessions, taught by a mature, Godly wman, about submission and the role/position of Christian women in the home and the church. He emailed me back and said he had been praying that a woman would step forward and offer to do that, and he asked if I would. I emailed back and said "yes" as long as I could meet with him first to be sure we are on the same page/track. So I will be meeting with ____ to discuss this. Meanwhile I was looking through some books, and thinking about and learning more about the position and role of women. I have been finding myself more and more - finally - accepting (and being happy about!) the Biblical instructions/principles. I really was happy to realize the fact that we as women are protected, and saved from stress, when we allow men to take their rightful position. In the past year or so, as I have followed Pastor Alan's advice to me to love and respect my husband (and to act love even if I don't feel it), as well as _____'s spiritual influence, I have seen such amazing change and maturity in my husband. To think that it was me who was holding him back! And I didn't see it! I thought I had to "step into the gap" and take on his responsibility until he got around to it - but actually I was interfering, blocking his way, or at least letting him off. (Though I think I really was blocking and interfering!) Forgive me, Lord! Thank You for Your love and guidance. No wonder I have not been able to lead, minister, reach out, preach (yes, to women!), witness, be a Godly mother (oh, Lord, that too I was blocking!). I simply was not yet walking in Your positioning for me as a Christian woman. Partly, I have surely been influenced by the world's feminism and individualism, but of course I have also been full of personal pride and self-sufficiency and desire for power and control and worldly recognition! Oh, dear Father, please forgive me! .... I was looking at the website of that street preacher, and one thing that spoke to me was his writing on divorce. You spoke to me through that, Lord! You made me realize that I have always tried to shift the blame for my own divorce to my ex-husband (and slander him in the process)... and have not accepted that I, too - probably mostly, if not all! - am to blame! I was the one, after all, who ran out of the relationship (whatever my reasons might have been) and allowed myself to fall, in more ways than one, for another man. Lord, I was wrong, and I am wrong for continuing to deny my guilt! Please, Lord, forgive me. Thank You! I see that this is yet another crucial step it is absolutely necessary that I take, and another understanding that I must have, before I can preach to women and/or be in leadership, that is, be a Titus 2:3-5 woman. Until my life is purified, how can I dare to even think of pointing other women to You? Sure, You do use the gospel, even from people with wrong motives, but that is not Your preference, and oh, Lord, I only want what You want. I only want Your approval, I only want the glory to be given to You! So, dear Lord, I do repent of all my infidelity (adultery, and fornication before I was first married, and the abortion, too), and I ask You to cleanse me and use me and direct me according to Your will. In Jesus' name! Thank You, Lord. Lord, please use all You have been teaching me, to change and transform my life in practical ways - in my relations with my husband, my children, my family (parents, siblings, relatives - and my husband's relatives, too), my church, my friends, my neighbours - and all whom You would have me minister to. Oh Lord, please help me to truly submit to my husband, to truly be under his leadership (spiritual and temporal). Use me, Lord, as his helpmeet, in all the purposes You have for him. Up to now, Lord, it's all been "help me." But it must be "help him" - and me as his wife and helpmeet. Help me to always allow and place him in the front position of leadership and headship. Thank You, Lord, in Jesus' name. (Thank You for teaching me these things, Lord! Thank You for preparing me!) Return to the top My Plans and Ways, Child ...(Thank You, Father) Date: June 12, 2006 Dear Heavenly Father, Here I am. I hear You... ***** Norma, My child, I love you. Rest in Me. Walk in Me. Lean not to your own understanding. Acknowledge me. I do have a wonderful plan for you, but it will happen in My way and My time. Do not try to rush it. Do not try to hurry folks along. Do not try to "drop suggestions." To be in subjection means that you are willing - and eager! - to set aside all your own ambitions, desires, hope, dreams, willing to give them up entirely, let them be crushed and destroyed even, if need be, in order that a greater good - God's good - may grow, slowly move forward, as painfully gradual as the unfolding may seem, until all God's good purposes come together to burst forth in eternal perfection and completeness, for God's glory. Subjection is laying aside your own glory for the greater glory of God. It may entail giving up to God all that you hold dear - but the outcome is always infinitely worth it. It is what Paul meant when he wrote, "I count all things loss, that I may gain Christ..." Be willing to give it all up, My child. Be willing to do things totally My way. My ways are truly not your ways and My thoughts are not your thoughts. You do have some great ideas, even "Godly" ideas - but what you need to have are My ideas - alone. You must let Me have complete control of every aspect of your life. You must let go of any opportunities you think that you see to "work" for Me or to "honor" Me. I have plans you have never even dreamed of. I have ways - more often than not, ways that are spurned by the world as foolish, unpleasant, unfulfilling, unsuccessful - that yet will bring together all My children, My family, My church, into the one great glorious body of believers under the headship and Lordship of My precious Son, Jesus Christ. Yes, you could be a person of influence in "your church." You could "take over" the womens' leadership. You could "move things along." But - are you sure that is what I want for you? I do have under women in Abundant Life's body who I have also been preparing for works of mercy and grace - and leadership. I know. You are anxious. You want My work to quickly and effectively "go ahead." You see that I have been preparing you for service, yes, servant ministry, Child. Ministry in subjection to My will, My place, My time. Dear Child, My plans are never disappointing. Yes, they are humbling you, they require lowliness of position in the eyes of the world - and in the eyes of the "church," more often than not. Remember what Alan said to you about the quiet ones often having the most important ministries. Read again your message from my Micaiah servant: "You're always to quiet - it's so often that those who are quiet are the most active in ministry - in ways that no one but God sees, but that are most effective of all (I'm reminded of the life of 'Praying Hyde.')" Slow down, Child. Be quiet, and patient, and practice being subject to Me - and to your husband, and to the church leadership, and all. Be subject, too, to your parents. Just love them, and please them in this difficult time. You have asked me to have mercy on them, and encourage them, and to answer your dad's prayers for his family. Do You not see that I am answering those prayers by giving you the opportunity to live out My mercy and grace before them and to them? Yes, it is "too much" for you alone. But you are never alone. I am always with you. And My strength is made perfect in your weakness. I need you right now for things that seem "small" in the eyes of the world. But they are great and glorious things in My economy, in My eternal, perfect purposes. My purposes always prevail. But how much more glorious it is when My children allow Me to lead them in the way I would ahve them go, right from the start. Can you do that for Me? Will you? Will you will to follow My will, My ways, My thoughts? Will you accept My will as yours, give up all that you will, hope, dream; and become wrapped, enveloped, fulfilled in Me? Walk My path, Child - Trust Me completely, fully, no matter what. And I will direct your paths. (And fulfill your dreams - My dreams that are infinitely greater and more wonderful and perfect and of eternal consequence than any mere human dream, will become your dreams, too, and I will confirm and fulfill them). Yes, Child, I love you. You are Mine. As you walk subject to Me, You will also walk worthy of Me. it is what you want, what you long for, what only I can provide. Accept it, Child. Unreservedly. "All for Jesus... days and hours... hopes and dreams... life, death, eternity... all". ********** Amen. Thank You, Lord. Amen. Okay. Return to the top Submitting to You - Giving up Me Date: June 12, 2006 I have been kind of wondering, in a sort of hazy way, the past few days, about getting "tied down" into Abundant Life. So many things happening - the Friday night street meetings, and the Sunday meeting in the park, mom and dad's situation, bartering baby sitting for French learning with ____, even ____'s educational situation, the school not being "ready" in September - and the quite clear sense that I shouldn't take on extra teaching responsibilities. June 13, 2006 Thank You for Your word about my taking on "leadership." Lord, please raise up women who can do this - by Your strength and through Your Spirit. And please do the same for me in this teaching, and in whatever other places You want me. You know I've been feeling badly about my lack of submission. As I've studied for this teaching, I have become very convicted - well, shocked - at how unsubmissive I have been - and how little I "got" when I studied this topic before. I can sure see why You help me back! Please forgive me, and help me ask my husband for forgiveness, too. Thank You, Lord. Amen. (I love You, Lord!) Amen! Return to the top
Main Page \| My Articles for The Life Connection \| Prayers and Meditations \| Poetry Haida Gwaii Reflections \| Education & Home-School \| Family