Conversations, Reflections & Meditations


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Sign Guestbook \| View Guestbook Comments? Questions? [email protected]	Prayer topics Relationships Amazing Grace and Love Writing God's Will Day by Day Trust and Obey Relationships Date: 10, 2006 Father, last night I was talking to one of my children. She was saying that maybe she and her siblings just don't really know what they believe right now. I was musing about how when the children were young, we could talk freely about anything and everything. But somewhere along the line, we seemed to stop talking to one another altogether. She responded that it was because at some point, in the pains and troubles of life, we just stopped trusting each other. Oh, dear Lord, please bring healing in our family. Help each of us to learn to trust You, so that trust among us as a family can be rebuilt through true unity based on loving, abiding relationship with You. I, myself, have not idea how that can be done. It is way too big and complicated for me, for sure. It is absolutely a "God-sized-job." And so, right now, dear Lord, I'm bringing it to You. Please "fix us," Lord. Please start by fixing me first! Thank You! And Lord, please bless my dear friend ________. Be with her, please, Lord. Bring healing. Bring real, strong relationship with You. Keep her eyes and heart fixed on You alone, Lord. Please solve the situation she is stuck in. In Jesus' name! Thank You, Lord, for bringing her to my attention just now so that I can pray for her and bring her to You. Oh, dear God, please just love her and heal her in body, mind and spirit. Let her know that You are real. Let her feel Your presence and be assured of Your love and care in a real, hands-on, clearly seen kind of way - or whatever way You know she needs right now. Thank You, Lord! Oh, and thank You, too, Lord for the chance to talk yesterday with the intermediate class at school about reading and journaling, and imagination, and how to go way beyond the "surface:"and ask questions, and think, and really get into things, and really, well, grow up! In You Lord. Please help them get that last part especially! And thank You for Christian schools where these kinds of conversations can still occur in the classroom! Thank You, Lord. Amen! Thank You for this morning's scripture reading, about when Joseph interpreted Pharaoh's dreams - and it was all about You! Amen! Return to the top Amazing Grace and Love Date: February 11, 2006 I have so many questions, Lord, questions about sin and righteousness and grace and faith and works and freedom and Your sovereignty, and just how it all exactly works together. But in all my wonderings, I see more and more how totally unworthy I am, and how every tiniest atom of "goodness" I have is a totally undeserved gift from You. And I see how utterly amazing it is that You would choose to enjoy a relationship with me, love me, bless me, reward me - for what, in the final analysis, You have done. It is true: "We love Him, because He first loved us." (1 Jn 4: ) As this realization of Your mercy and grace grows upon me, I do love You and am in awe, and yes, holy fear, and worship of You more and more. When my knowledge of You, Lord, was mainly just a collection of facts, my love was small, perhaps almost non-existent. It is in experiencing Your wonder and grace - by Your choice and gift, giving me the ability to do so - that I can begin to love You, because I have known You, experienced You, interacted with You, received from You. And I have realized that in myself, I have nothing to give you. I have realized that I am unworthy, totally. I can remember trying to "feel unworthy" because I was told that I should, but it is only in really knowing You that I have really begun to even slightly comprehend the depths of my unworthiness. Can I really have any sorrow for my sins, any comprehension of my need for repentance, until You have gifted me with the faith to know You, to see You, and in seeing You as You truly are, begin, in a long, continuing, growing process, to comprehend how immeasurably great and perfect You are, and what a truly worthless, totally unacceptable, totally low-down filthy heap of putrid, infected rags I had been in the sight of a perfect and Holy God? Can I say that You are "my God" even, until You have granted me the faith to hear Your call, and have given me the desire to turn to You? Oh, "my Lord and my God!" I feel, just now, like doubting Thomas must have felt when the truth of Your resurrection and Who You really are, dear Lord Jesus, finally struck him, like a brilliant flash of lightning breaking into the inky blackness of sin's dark and endless night of death. Amazing grace! Thank You, dear Jesus, for Your great, painful, horrific sacrifice through which I, totally undeserving, have been granted salvation and reconciled with God, my Creator. Thank You, dear God, for sacrificing Yourself. It is just incomprehensible to me, the wonder and glory and honor of my God. Thank You. Return to the top Writing Date: February 15, 2006 There was a time when I saw my writing as a possible source of income. That still flits around the edges of my thoughts now and then, but I have gotten to the point that I really don't care about that any more. You are in control! "Give us this day our daily bread" in whatever way You choose. If You call me to write, I'll write. It's not a job. It's not a career. It is just joyfully and gratefully obeying You, out of love for the amazing, uncountable, immeasurable love You have first shown me. Thank You! Hallelujah! I am excited to share with others what You have spoken to my spirit, what You have taught me. I go back to read things my hand has written before, and I am amazed. It is not my words. There are thoughts that can only have come from You. I record them, yes, and I can go back and edit, correct grammar, excise the parts of "me" that invade, take out details that might hurt other people, that sort of thing. But the essence of what is "worth publishing" is from You. It is also true that it comes through the filter of my writing style, my life experience, the place I am in my walk with You, my culture, my background, and so on, but it is You. It is genuinely (those parts that are of value) conversation with You, listening to Your Spirit speak to my spirit. What else could it be? I do not have it in me! Thank You, Lord! Your will be done! Return to the top God's Will Date: February 16, 2006 I have been thinking about Your will, dear God, and how one knows it, and when one should step out in obedience. It seems to me that I just have to get out there, live life as it comes to hand day by day, and then You will, along the way, reveal Your special vision or gifts or work for me, by the circumstances and the passion and power that You provide. Is that right, Lord? But do You sometimes clearly show Your will up front? What about Timothy, when Paul tells him to "stir up the gift which is in you by the laying on of hands"? What about people, who know they have a "calling"? Should everyone have a calling? Or do You work differently in different people in this way as well? It certainly seems to me, more and more, that You are a God of diversity. Yes, You have particular attributes and principles that never change, but it seems like the details, the particular ways You work within these frameworks, are very diverse, and often very surprising, unexpected, and adventuresome! Which I like the idea of. But I don't want to have this idea just because I like it, or because it makes me feel better about my own experience. I want to know that I am following You in Your truth, not in my ways or the world's or the enemy's ways or the ways of the flesh. I don't want to write just for the sake of writing, just to fill space, Lord. I want to redeem the time, to be a good steward, to use my time, talents and treasure in the best way, the way You would have me do. Thank You, Lord. Your will be done. Return to the top Day by Day Date: February 17, 2005 "When the Spirit of God comes He does not give us visions, He tells us to do the most ordinary things conceivable; the things we would never have imagined God was in, and as we do them we find He is there... do the next thing and do it in the inspiration of God.... Immediately we arise and obey, we enter on a higher plane of life." (My Utmost for His Highest, Oswald Chambers, Feb. 17) Is that first line, true, Lord: that Your Spirit does not give us visions? That is quite a different thought than we most often hear in this day and age: "Ask God to give you a vision". "God has given our church a great vision to..." Suppose instead of spending all kinds of money to build a huge building, hire a fancy speaker, develop a huge program, we just took a bowl of soup and a sandwich out to the homeless person sitting on the sidewalk in front of the church; struck up a conversation with them, prayed for them, maybe hired them to sweep the sidewalk and wash the windows so they had enough cash for a bed for the night at the hostel. What if, instead of dreaming about my "retreat center" I just really focus on teaching my children and their friends when they come by, and my neighbors and friends and the young people at church and at school, the basics of sewing, cooking, crafts, budgeting - and about You. Not setting up a formal place to do those things but just doing them with whoever comes to hand. That would be something, eh! Thank You for the devotional today, Lord. It grounds me and reminds me that everything You set in my way, Lord, is meant to be redeemed by me for Your glory! Amen! Return to the top Trust and Obey Date: February 20, 2006 I have tended to think of "trust and obey" as two rather discrete commands. But today I read in my devotional that failing to obey is because of failing to trust. Trust results in obedience. And obedience, with its results, results in greater trust, and so on. Return to the top
Main Page \| My Articles for The Life Connection \| Prayers and Meditations \| Poetry Haida Gwaii Reflections \| Education & Home-School \| Family


	Main Page \| My Articles for The Life Connection \| Prayers and Meditations \| Poetry Haida Gwaii Reflections \| Education & Home-School \| Family
Sign Guestbook \| View Guestbook Comments? Questions? [email protected]	Prayer topics Relationships Amazing Grace and Love Writing God's Will Day by Day Trust and Obey Relationships Date: 10, 2006 Father, last night I was talking to one of my children. She was saying that maybe she and her siblings just don't really know what they believe right now. I was musing about how when the children were young, we could talk freely about anything and everything. But somewhere along the line, we seemed to stop talking to one another altogether. She responded that it was because at some point, in the pains and troubles of life, we just stopped trusting each other. Oh, dear Lord, please bring healing in our family. Help each of us to learn to trust You, so that trust among us as a family can be rebuilt through true unity based on loving, abiding relationship with You. I, myself, have not idea how that can be done. It is way too big and complicated for me, for sure. It is absolutely a "God-sized-job." And so, right now, dear Lord, I'm bringing it to You. Please "fix us," Lord. Please start by fixing me first! Thank You! And Lord, please bless my dear friend ________. Be with her, please, Lord. Bring healing. Bring real, strong relationship with You. Keep her eyes and heart fixed on You alone, Lord. Please solve the situation she is stuck in. In Jesus' name! Thank You, Lord, for bringing her to my attention just now so that I can pray for her and bring her to You. Oh, dear God, please just love her and heal her in body, mind and spirit. Let her know that You are real. Let her feel Your presence and be assured of Your love and care in a real, hands-on, clearly seen kind of way - or whatever way You know she needs right now. Thank You, Lord! Oh, and thank You, too, Lord for the chance to talk yesterday with the intermediate class at school about reading and journaling, and imagination, and how to go way beyond the "surface:"and ask questions, and think, and really get into things, and really, well, grow up! In You Lord. Please help them get that last part especially! And thank You for Christian schools where these kinds of conversations can still occur in the classroom! Thank You, Lord. Amen! Thank You for this morning's scripture reading, about when Joseph interpreted Pharaoh's dreams - and it was all about You! Amen! Return to the top Amazing Grace and Love Date: February 11, 2006 I have so many questions, Lord, questions about sin and righteousness and grace and faith and works and freedom and Your sovereignty, and just how it all exactly works together. But in all my wonderings, I see more and more how totally unworthy I am, and how every tiniest atom of "goodness" I have is a totally undeserved gift from You. And I see how utterly amazing it is that You would choose to enjoy a relationship with me, love me, bless me, reward me - for what, in the final analysis, You have done. It is true: "We love Him, because He first loved us." (1 Jn 4: ) As this realization of Your mercy and grace grows upon me, I do love You and am in awe, and yes, holy fear, and worship of You more and more. When my knowledge of You, Lord, was mainly just a collection of facts, my love was small, perhaps almost non-existent. It is in experiencing Your wonder and grace - by Your choice and gift, giving me the ability to do so - that I can begin to love You, because I have known You, experienced You, interacted with You, received from You. And I have realized that in myself, I have nothing to give you. I have realized that I am unworthy, totally. I can remember trying to "feel unworthy" because I was told that I should, but it is only in really knowing You that I have really begun to even slightly comprehend the depths of my unworthiness. Can I really have any sorrow for my sins, any comprehension of my need for repentance, until You have gifted me with the faith to know You, to see You, and in seeing You as You truly are, begin, in a long, continuing, growing process, to comprehend how immeasurably great and perfect You are, and what a truly worthless, totally unacceptable, totally low-down filthy heap of putrid, infected rags I had been in the sight of a perfect and Holy God? Can I say that You are "my God" even, until You have granted me the faith to hear Your call, and have given me the desire to turn to You? Oh, "my Lord and my God!" I feel, just now, like doubting Thomas must have felt when the truth of Your resurrection and Who You really are, dear Lord Jesus, finally struck him, like a brilliant flash of lightning breaking into the inky blackness of sin's dark and endless night of death. Amazing grace! Thank You, dear Jesus, for Your great, painful, horrific sacrifice through which I, totally undeserving, have been granted salvation and reconciled with God, my Creator. Thank You, dear God, for sacrificing Yourself. It is just incomprehensible to me, the wonder and glory and honor of my God. Thank You. Return to the top Writing Date: February 15, 2006 There was a time when I saw my writing as a possible source of income. That still flits around the edges of my thoughts now and then, but I have gotten to the point that I really don't care about that any more. You are in control! "Give us this day our daily bread" in whatever way You choose. If You call me to write, I'll write. It's not a job. It's not a career. It is just joyfully and gratefully obeying You, out of love for the amazing, uncountable, immeasurable love You have first shown me. Thank You! Hallelujah! I am excited to share with others what You have spoken to my spirit, what You have taught me. I go back to read things my hand has written before, and I am amazed. It is not my words. There are thoughts that can only have come from You. I record them, yes, and I can go back and edit, correct grammar, excise the parts of "me" that invade, take out details that might hurt other people, that sort of thing. But the essence of what is "worth publishing" is from You. It is also true that it comes through the filter of my writing style, my life experience, the place I am in my walk with You, my culture, my background, and so on, but it is You. It is genuinely (those parts that are of value) conversation with You, listening to Your Spirit speak to my spirit. What else could it be? I do not have it in me! Thank You, Lord! Your will be done! Return to the top God's Will Date: February 16, 2006 I have been thinking about Your will, dear God, and how one knows it, and when one should step out in obedience. It seems to me that I just have to get out there, live life as it comes to hand day by day, and then You will, along the way, reveal Your special vision or gifts or work for me, by the circumstances and the passion and power that You provide. Is that right, Lord? But do You sometimes clearly show Your will up front? What about Timothy, when Paul tells him to "stir up the gift which is in you by the laying on of hands"? What about people, who know they have a "calling"? Should everyone have a calling? Or do You work differently in different people in this way as well? It certainly seems to me, more and more, that You are a God of diversity. Yes, You have particular attributes and principles that never change, but it seems like the details, the particular ways You work within these frameworks, are very diverse, and often very surprising, unexpected, and adventuresome! Which I like the idea of. But I don't want to have this idea just because I like it, or because it makes me feel better about my own experience. I want to know that I am following You in Your truth, not in my ways or the world's or the enemy's ways or the ways of the flesh. I don't want to write just for the sake of writing, just to fill space, Lord. I want to redeem the time, to be a good steward, to use my time, talents and treasure in the best way, the way You would have me do. Thank You, Lord. Your will be done. Return to the top Day by Day Date: February 17, 2005 "When the Spirit of God comes He does not give us visions, He tells us to do the most ordinary things conceivable; the things we would never have imagined God was in, and as we do them we find He is there... do the next thing and do it in the inspiration of God.... Immediately we arise and obey, we enter on a higher plane of life." (My Utmost for His Highest, Oswald Chambers, Feb. 17) Is that first line, true, Lord: that Your Spirit does not give us visions? That is quite a different thought than we most often hear in this day and age: "Ask God to give you a vision". "God has given our church a great vision to..." Suppose instead of spending all kinds of money to build a huge building, hire a fancy speaker, develop a huge program, we just took a bowl of soup and a sandwich out to the homeless person sitting on the sidewalk in front of the church; struck up a conversation with them, prayed for them, maybe hired them to sweep the sidewalk and wash the windows so they had enough cash for a bed for the night at the hostel. What if, instead of dreaming about my "retreat center" I just really focus on teaching my children and their friends when they come by, and my neighbors and friends and the young people at church and at school, the basics of sewing, cooking, crafts, budgeting - and about You. Not setting up a formal place to do those things but just doing them with whoever comes to hand. That would be something, eh! Thank You for the devotional today, Lord. It grounds me and reminds me that everything You set in my way, Lord, is meant to be redeemed by me for Your glory! Amen! Return to the top Trust and Obey Date: February 20, 2006 I have tended to think of "trust and obey" as two rather discrete commands. But today I read in my devotional that failing to obey is because of failing to trust. Trust results in obedience. And obedience, with its results, results in greater trust, and so on. Return to the top
Main Page \| My Articles for The Life Connection \| Prayers and Meditations \| Poetry Haida Gwaii Reflections \| Education & Home-School \| Family