Article I: I am a salesman.
I am interested in one thing. Money. Money for ME! Money money money money
money. I want money! It's MINE! Mine mine mine mine mine mine! Gimme gimme
gimme gimme!!!
Article II: I will do anything
in my power to make a sale. My rationale is defined in article I.
Article III: I don’t care
if I piss off my coworkers to make a sale. My rationale is defined in article
I.
Article IV: I will sell what
we do not have. If we do have it and it is committed to another customer,
I will rape and pillage it to make my sale. My rationale is defined in article
I.
Article V: I will sell unfinished
or nonexisting products. When I do sell things that are unfinished/do not
exist, I will tell the people behind the scenes what to make to make me look
good to the customer. My rationale is defined in article I.
Article VI: I will constantly
harass my coworkers to make the promises I made to the customer come true.
NOW!!! My rationale is defined in article I.
Article VII: I am a prostitute
to the customer. I will do anything to be the customer’s best friend. My
rationale is defined in article I.
Article VIII: I will take
full credit for sales other people make or drop into my lap. My rationale
is defined in article I.
Article IX: I will over promise
and under deliver. I will blame the underdelivery on my coworkers. My rationale
is defined in article I.
Article X: I will always hold
true to the salesman’s code of conduct. My rationale is defined in article
I.