As a society, we are all told that breakfast is the most important meal of the day. It is the first thing we eat in the morning that fuels our bodies for the day to come. Of course, many people choose to eat cereal for this all important meal without thinking about where it came from, or at what cost to others that it comes to us. Everyone has seen the memorable cartoon characters that represent the cereals we eat, and likewise have seen first hand the hardships that these characters have to endure so that the cereal makes it to our breakfast table everyday. The Trix rabbit, the Cheerios bee, and Lucky the leprechaun from Lucky Charms have all had to neglect their own appetites involuntarily so that we humans can satisfy our own hunger every morning.
The Trix rabbit is a cereal box character that must forgo breakfast in order to correspond with the greed and gluttony of the kids who always chase him around. What makes this situation so tragic is that this action is involuntary, leaving the rabbit to starve. In Trix commercials, a large white rabbit is always joined devising an elaborate plan to get his Trix cereal back from two or more kids. The rabbit is often seen in clever disguises, tricking the kids until they decide to give him some cereal. However, the rabbit is always caught for who he truly is, and the kids then proceed to tear the bowl of cereal from the rabbits defeated hands, stating their slogan, �Silly rabbit, Trix are for kids.� Does anyone else see anything inherently wrong with this picture? To begin with, these Trix belong to the rabbit, plain and simple. The kids are no better than common, everyday criminals, stealing the bowl of cereal from him. One then wonders why the rabbit does not call the police, or take the kids to court seeking retribution for the theft that has ensued. To justify this wrongful deed, the kids always say, �Silly rabbit, Trix are for kids.� Who exactly made this rule? Is it in the bible or something that God appeared and said, �Thou shalt not share thy cereal with rabbits�? Of course not! If Trix truly were meant for kids, then a kid would be the representative on the box rather than the rabbit. These kids have to learn that just because a person makes up a rule, it does not make it a law. One can also assume after seeing the nature of these kids that they only steal the rabbit�s Trix to be malicious. It can easily be envisioned that these kids go home to their big mansions at night and throw their five course gourmet dinners in the trash because they filled up during the day on Trix just to make the rabbit feel bad and go hungry. Why can the rabbit not just have some cereal? After all, it was his to begin with.
The Cheerios bee is another cartoon cereal character that can never seem to get fed. Similarly to the Trix rabbit, he always looses his cereal to the greed of a human kid. In Cheerios commercials, we always see the bee and a kid notice a box of Cheerios cereal across a crowded area. Naturally, the selfish nature of these two consumes them, and they make a wager that whoever can get to the box first takes the whole thing. The two participants now race through the crowd in order to claim their prize, however the bee always encounters several obstacles in his path, and undoubtedly always hits one that he cannot avoid, leaving as easy jog to the preverbal finish line where the kid can easily claim the Cheerios. The bee is then left to sulk over his loss. Granted, the bee�s compulsive gambling disorder always provokes his inevitable failure, however the terms of the race are never fair in these commercials. Instead of this race testing the speed and determination of its contenders, we see numerous variables that constantly disrupt the bee�s path. A person always steps in front of the bee, or takes a swat at the bee, or opens a door right in the bee�s face. Note however, that none of these things ever occur with respect to the kid. This would make one wonder if perhaps the kid has paid all of these people in the crowd to make sure the bee does not win. Keep in mind that this is like, a 5-foot-8 kid, competing against a 2 inch bee. Would these commercials have the general public believe that something 5-foot-8 can squeeze through obstacles that something 2 inches cannot? Of course, the thought of this is absurd. This only leaves the explanation that the crowd has some sort of problem with the bee being happy, and that the kid went to extensive measures to make sure the bee would lose. Sure, the bee consistently loses these races, but at least he is not a dirty cheater.
Lucky the leprechaun of Lucky Charms is another example of a cereal box mascot having their own cereal ripped away from them. Of course, similarly to the Trix rabbit, Lucky forfeiting his cereal is always an involuntary action. In the Lucky Charms commercials, we join Lucky in a frantic sprint as he is being chased by a group of kids who are after his Lucky Charms. The commercials always end the same; with Lucky cornered in a hopeless situation--for example at the edge of a cliff with the group of kids approaching--and poses the question, �Can you name me marshmallow shapes?� and �They�re magically delicious!� First off, one wonders where the police are in this world, as angry violent mobs are generally frowned upon in this society; particularly the Hitler youth group that is chasing Lucky. Second, one wonders that if Lucky is in fact magical, why does he not just simply create a bazooka or something of that nature to nip this problem in the bud? In any case, the most important aspect of this commercial is the fact that these Nazi kids are chasing Lucky around with the eventual goal of stealing his Lucky Charms. If they simply asked Lucky for some, I am sure he would graciously share his cereal with all of them. However, they have to take the anarchical route and attempt to steal them. The commercial ends with Lucky cornered, and it can easily be concluded that this is to keep the commercial rated PG. Has anyone ever put any thought into what happens to Lucky after the commercial cuts out? Guaranteed when the kids catch up, at least two of them are holding Lucky down while the rest of them gang beat him nearly to death before stealing his Lucky Charms. So next time you are in the cereal aisle at the grocery store, remember that if you purchase Lucky Charms you are helping Lucky pay his hospital bill.
Next time you see a cereal commercial, and are thinking about how big losers the mascots are that they can never get any of their own cereal, remember the unfair circumstances they each face. The Trix rabbit has to obey some made up law. If I were the Trix rabbit, I would hire the best lawyer money could buy, and see to it that these kids got the death penalty. The Cheerios bee has to face a crowd that is seemingly prejudice against bees. If I were this bee, I would even the odds a bit by racing someone who was allergic to bee stings, then seeing if they can still graze to the finish line when they are dead! Lucky the leprechaun has to face this street gang who has dedicated their lives to beating Lucky up. If I were Lucky, I would keep in mind the fact that I was Irish. I would then have too much to drink, and let my Irish instincts take over. Remember; just because they are mascots, does not mean they do not have feelings.