| ~Chapter 12~ Reims, France ~ February 22nd, 1915 Satine awoke with a start to the sound of a muffled cry coming from Sara�s bedroom. She stood up and rubbed her eyes as she stumbled down the hall. She was so very tired, but as soon as she saw her little girl�s face, getting up was just a small inconvenience. Satine opened up Sara�s bedroom door and bit her lip when she saw her eyes with large tears in them. �Oh sweetheart,� Satine cooed. She leaned over to pick up Sara and took her to sit down in the large, wooden rocking chair. �Are you hungry?� she asked her sobbing daughter. She slid one strap of her nightgown off her shoulder to reveal a swollen breast. Satine held Sara there for a moment until she began drinking hungrily. �That�s it darling,� she whispered. �Mama is here.� She traced the soft lines of Sara�s face and ran her palm across her wispy hair. Satine looked into Sara's bright blue eyes as she continued to feed. She relished in the connection of mother and daughter that she couldn�t have even begun to imagine before Sara. It was remarkable how much love she could possess for the tiny person in her arms. �Oh, Mama loves you so much,� Satine spoke softly. She gently tapped her foot on the ground and got them rocking in a calming, repetitive motion. She hummed, as she had come to do often and began to sing. Nothing so bright, nothing so smooth, nothing so pure As my baby All of my life days into night, all I did dream Was my baby She couldn�t believe that she had married her soul mate and had the most perfect little girl. Her life at the Moulin Rouge always dashed those dreams. But Christian and Sara made the dream that she had when she was just a little girl come true. Until the days darkness entwined with silver eyes Was my baby staring at me Satine�s breath caught in her throat whenever she looked into the vivid blue eyes that mirrored her own. As Sara continued to nurse, she stared intently at her mother. She still didn�t understand very much about the world. All she knew was that when Mama was there, she would make everything be all right. And since then I can't see straight And since then my smile's been fake Funny I know the troubles I've seen But through one eye only that's clean If you bring along your needles Then I'll bring my sharpened pencils And draw one more comic tragedy My baby Sara was soon full and ready to return to the warmth of her crib. Satine propped Sara against her shoulder and patted her back. Once she let out a tiny burp, Satine felt her become even more relaxed as she finished the song in her baby�s tiny ear. So call up the child players From madam we'll rent the parlor And dance to death till I can't see My baby By the time the song was over, Sara had fallen fast asleep to the reassuring sound of her mother�s voice. Satine pulled her nightgown strap back up and kissed the top of Sara�s small head. Without making a single sound, Satine rested Sara�s cheek on her shoulder and carried her back to the small crib. �Goodnight,� Satine mouthed to her sleeping angel and silently closed the door behind her. Once back in her own room, Satine�s eyes filled with tears at the thought of having to leave her darling baby girl in a few months. But she soon pushed the idea from her mind. She still had so many precious moments left with Sara and when she really did have to leave, it would be to see the other who owned her heart. Reims, France ~ April 15th, 1915 �Coming�alright, I-I�m coming!� Satine called, her shoes tapping quickly through the hallway down to the front door. She took a deep, cleansing breath and smoothed out her dress a little before she swung open the door. �Miss Satine!� Satie smiled as he put his arms around her immediately, taking her in for a friendly embrace. �Satie�what a pleasure to see you!� she replied, hugging him in return. She closed her eyes briefly, and then opened them to see Chocolat standing quietly in the doorway. �Oh, dear Chocolat!� Satine exclaimed and let go of Satie to take the large peaceful man into her arms. �How do you do, Mademoiselle?� he asked politely as she backed away from him after a moment. �I�m�well, I�m alright�oh, c-come in,� she said breathlessly, smiling. Satie beamed at her, picked up his two good-sized bags and kissed Satine on the cheek as he walked in the house to look around. �Sara is asleep right now, gentlemen; you�ll have to meet the little angel later,� Satine said pleasantly, watching Chocolat take a good look around the room. �This is beautiful, Mademoiselle,� he said running his hands over a French tapestry hanging on the wall. Satine and the two Bohemians walked around the house, talking abut this and that. Just simply talking and laughing with Satie and Chocolat again brought back some memories that she never thought she�d think of again. Most of the memories were of love, lust, pain, joy, life-changing experiences that had slipped her mind; but the images that were constant through the whole conversation were of her former home, Le Moulin Rouge. Her mind swirled, until finally the three reached sleeping Sara�s room. �Shh�we can go in if you�re very quiet,� Satine whispered behind her as she creaked open the door. The two tip-toed expertly, somehow avoiding all the creaky boards in the floor as if they knew which ones not to step on. They reached Sara�s crib and stood in awe of Sara�s content, steady breathing. After a moment, a silent tear fell down Chocolat�s cheek that he let no one see. �This is Sara�� Satine barely spoke above a whisper, staring at her daughter in a daze. For a moment, she questioned leaving her home; but just as soon as the moment had come, it left. This is because just the mere thought of having Christian and her beloved daughter together in the same room, under the same loving roof gave Satine such joy that she couldn�t express. Satine would bring her family back together. A month passed when Satie and Chocolat grew accustomed to Sara�s antics, and she took an immediate liking to both of the friendly, loving Bohos right away. Satine began to pack her belongings slowly, keeping in mind that it was only for the sake of her family that she was leaving. Christian and Sara were her life, and she couldn�t go on without them both. The night finally came before Satine had to leave for Langres. Reims, France ~ May 10th, 1915 Satine stirred in bed. She strained her eyes in the dark room to see the hands of the clock. It was still just five in the morning. Her usually warm, soft bed, made her feel restless and uncomfortable. She had been tossing and turning all night. The train she was to be taking left early, 7:00am; there was no use in going back to bed now. Popping her stiff neck, Satine got out of bed and opened the curtains half way to reveal large droplets of rain clinging to the glass. She sighed, weather to match her emotions. She didn�t know whether to cry in joy for seeing her husband, or to sob in anguish for leaving her baby. A tear rolled down her cheek and a song began to pour from her soul. I listen to the sound of the rain Fallin� down my window Prayin� for a gentle wind To bring my baby back again Tryin� to be strong but I�m not getting Any stronger Loneliness is tearing apart this heart Of mine I lie awake �cause I can�t take another Night lonely It�s been too long, I can�t hold on No more Satine determinedly walked across her bedroom and past her packed bags. She slipped off her nightgown and stepped out of it as it pooled at her feet. Once in the adjoining bathroom, she cupped her hands under the tap and splashed her face with some cool water. She shivered as the droplets, mixed with her tears of confusion, trickled down her face. Leavin� on the next train out �Cause I gotta see my baby It�s been too long since I�ve held him In my arms And I just won�t sleep at night Till he�s sleeping here beside me Here beside me Satine rolled a stocking to her mid thigh and secured her garter belt. After repeating the process with the other leg, she pulled her crisp, white nurse�s uniform over her head and fastened the remaining buttons. After stepping into a pair of black flats, she called for Catherine, who was already up and about at this hour, to carry her bags downstairs. Satine fiercely wiped her eyes, knowing that this was for the best. Applying some make up, she choked out A letter doesn�t make it any better Nothing is gonna ease this pain Until I�m in his arms again Running down the stairs there�s a ride That�s waiting for me Loneliness I�m gonna leave you Far behind I�d walk for days through Pouring rain Anything to be with him It�s been too long, I can�t be Strong no more Leavin� on the next train out �Cause I gotta see my baby It�s been too long since I�ve held him In my arms And I just won�t sleep at night Till he�s sleeping here beside me Here beside me again Once downstairs, Satine was surprised to Chocolat waiting for her. �I fixed you some oatmeal, Miss Satine,� he said softly. His strong, deep voice never sounding more comforting. �My mama used to make it for me when I was young and had a tough day ahead of me. I even added some brown sugar on top,� he smiled weakly. �Thank you, Chocolat,� Satine whispered as he handed her a freshly pressed napkin and pushed her chair squarely under the table. �It is my pleasure,� Chocolat said warmly. �Now, you just enjoy that oatmeal, Miss Satine. I will go wake Satie and Sara, I�m sure they will want to say goodbye.� Satine nodded painfully and watched as Chocolat turned and left. Gotta be with him Gotta be by his side Gotta be with him My heart�s made up my mind Leavin� on the next train out �Cause I gotta see my baby It�s been too long since I�ve held him In my arms And I just won�t sleep at night Till he�s sleeping here beside me Here beside me again �Cause I gotta see my baby It�s been too long since I�ve held him In my arms And I just won�t sleep at night Till he�s sleeping here beside me Here beside me again The rest of Satine�s time at home passed quickly and soon she found herself in the doorway, saying her final goodbyes to her loved ones. She had already bid farewell to her kind staff, but now she had to go through the task of parting with her friends and Sara� �Please be careful,� Satie pleaded in that nervous tone that he had come to acquire. Satine wrapped him in a tight hug and he lovingly kissed her cheek. At least she knew Sara would be in excellent hands. These boys were like her big brothers. Chocolat handed Sara to Satie so he could envelope Satine in one of his enormous bear hugs. He smoothed back a few red hairs that had fallen in her face and whispered, �I love you, Miss Satine.� �I love you too, Chocolat,� Satine replied, smiling at her sweet friends. Satine knew that she couldn�t prolong saying goodbye to Sara forever. She took a few deep breaths and Satie placed her in Satine�s arms. �Mama is always here with you,� she whimpered. �I love you so, so very much. I�m going to bring Daddy home. We�re going to be a family.� She kissed Sara�s soft cheek and handed her back to Satie as a flood of tears threatened to spill. After waving and kisses, Satine bravely picked up her two bags and turned on her heels, knowing if she looked behind, she wouldn�t be able to leave. Satine had to see Christian again. She had a terrible feeling that her poet was in pain. She swallowed hard and left to the station to board a train that would take her to rescue the Bohemian spirit of her sweet boy. Gotta be with my baby, gonna be With my baby Gonna take the next train Oh the next train Gotta get there to see my baby And nothing�s gonna stop me from Leaving on the next train out� Langres, France on the battlefield ~ May 10th, 1915 A breeze that only Christian noticed blew quietly across the temporarily silent field as the men crept. They moved, hunched over in camouflage, clutching onto their weapons. Christian obeyed the line leader like a trained dog, watching him with every step; his mind however was elsewhere, as it usually was. The troops finally came to a halt in the dead of the night, and Christian�s eyes wandered from the leader. He breathed out silently, and looked to his left. A cricket jumped in front of him and he followed its path. Jumping to and fro, the little bug had Christian�s attention; he looked for anything to distract himself from the violence that was to come. He began creeping forward, following the cricket in curiosity. After a minute, he lost sight of the insect and looked around him. Where was he? He remained calm as he was trained to do, but began creeping a bit faster and louder back in the direction he had come from. At least, he thought it was the direction he�d come from. After another minute had passed, Christian�s breathing was heavy and he decided to stand up to get a better look around him. He turned full circle, his eyebrows creased in frustration of the darkness. As he was about to hunch back down into the safety of the shrubs�a voice. �H�nde oben,� a deep, dark voice spoke in German from behind Christian. He didn�t move. �H�nde oben!� he repeated. Christian closed his eyes and raised his arms slowly. They shook. �Weg�WALK!� the man boomed and jabbed him harshly in his back with the butt of a gun. Christian opened his eyes, and breathing heavily he began walking in some direction that he didn�t know. �Sie sind von der Deutschen Armee. Widerstehen Sie nicht�.you�captured,� the man grumbled, pushing Christian roughly from behind. Christian couldn�t dignify a response; he wouldn�t. He could only hope, wish and pray that he would see his family again. He needed them, and only now could he see a clear vision of his wife and daughter sitting below a Christmas tree�without him. Songs used; �Baby� Rufus Wainwright �Next Plane Out� Celine Dion |