12 Things You Would Never 
 Know Without Indian Movies... 
 1) A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will w
    wince when a woman tries to cleanse his wounds.
 2) If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through it 
    before long.
 3) Nothing is too tight for Madhuri.
 4) The hero cannot fall in love with the heroine (vice versa) unless they 
    first perform a dance number in the rain.
 5) Once applied, make up is permanent, in rain or in any other situation.
 6) Village girls who live among cows and sheep have perfect skin and teeth.
 7) A large group of gundas can be shooting at the hero, but he will never 
    be hit, unless of course his is attempting to save the chic.
 7b) A large group of gundas can be shooting at the hero with machine guns, 
     yet they will always miss. Every shot the hero takes from his small 
     revolver will knock down at least ten opponents in a line.
 8) If you decide to start dancing in a field, everyone you bump into will 
    know all the steps, and will be wearing coordinated outfits.
 9) It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving 
    martial arts - your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one 
    by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out 
    their predecessors.
 10) You can always find a trimurti when you need one. (as in Anjaam)
 11) If faced with certain death, do not panick. Merely chant, "Gangpati 
     Baba" and after a few short bolts of lightning, all will be well.
 12) A heroine will have time to change outfits several times in one song, 
     however short.

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