The light from the moon filtered through the wooden blinds. His face was hidden from her in the dark. She touched his arm and he sighed. Who was he really, she wondered. When they met in the bar downstairs she had asked what he did for a living. He never answered that question.
What had transpired in the last hour was something new to her. She had never felt so drawn to anyone. His mouth.. she could not take her eyes from it. She had mental images that shocked her. She had never thought or felt like this before. The deep brown eyes.. so understanding and yet secretive.
He turned toward her again and she felt his hand on her breast. His lips touched hers again. She was lost .. that mouth .. that wonderful mouth.. it had given her pleasure she did not know was possible.
******************************************************
The sun was shining and the blinds had been opened. It was so bright she could hardly bear to open her eyes.
He was standing by the window staring out at the sea.
She sat up and begged him to come back to bed.
He turned and she saw the collar.
She saw the apology in his eyes.
He saw the shock in hers.
When she came to San Cristobel it was on the advice of some friends. They told her it was a magic place where astonishing things happened. All moonlight and magic. Well if this was magic it was black magic.
They stared at each other .. the mongoose and the snake." Which was she?" she wondered.
He crossed over to the bed and sat down next to her.
"I am sorry.. I should have told you. ," his dark eyes pleading to be understood.
" I don't know what to say why didn't you tell me last night?" she could hardly look at him. Her eyes lowered. What had been a beautiful and romantic dream had now turned into a nightmare.
***************************************
Ray told her that it was as unexpected for him as it was for her. He had just left his cousin and his new wife. It had been a wonderful romantic night for them. He was feeling a little down and decided to have a drink. Something he never did.. but somehow it seemed appropriate last night. They had started talking and he suddenly felt very much alone. He could not explain why this happened. It just did and it was best that they put it behind them. He was sorry . He did not mean in any way to bring her pain.
She sat in stunned silence. How could he be so calm about what had happened. It had meant so much to her. She was not some child. She had certainly known that this was a risk. She had felt that this was a special man. Someone who was different from any other she had known. He was different all right. What a complete fool she had been.
Ray looked at her and realized that she was devastated . He had never meant to hurt anyone. Last night was something that never should have happened. He knew where he belonged. He had committed a sin.. he knew that too. It wasn't the lonely feelings he had described to her. He forced himself to be honest.
It was Michelle and Danny.. their open lust for one another, their obvious connection. He longed to feel that himself. Ah , envy that was the sin. Yes, the root of his problem.. envy.
She wondered what he was thinking. He seemed so deep in thought.
He asked her if she was here with anyone. She wondered why he would ask such a question.
He didn't think she should be alone.
How thoughtful of him.
She got up from the bed and went to the shower. Maybe she could cleanse herself of these feelings. Wash them all away. Forget his touch, forget his lovemaking. It didn't happen . It was all some nightmare caused by bad food, too many drinks.. too much something,anything.
He sat by the window. He had no feelings now. Just a dull pain in his chest. His broken vows, and broken heart. Why .. had he done this.. how many ways could he torture himself over this.
The phone rang and he stared at it as thought it were some foreign object he had never seen before. He picked up the receiver and said " Yes"
"Hey cousin, you awake on this beautiful morning. Michelle and I are starving and wondered if you wanted some company for breakfast. We can meet you in the dining room in about oh.. 15 minutes.. you up for that?"
"Danny, I .. uh.. I am not very hungry and I think I will pass on that this morning"
"What's wrong , Ray.. you sound really down.. c'mon.. meet us in the dining room. We will cheer you up. Nobody can be unhappy this morning.. Michelle says it isn't allowed."
He was so damn cheerful.. Ray thought he could not stand to listen anymore. "Envy again my friend.?" this little voice in his head asked.
"All right Danny.. I will see you in 15 minutes.. ," he hung up the phone and hoped she did not hear him.
She emerged from the shower and quickly got dressed. He couldn't take his eyes off her. What a beautiful body she had. He really had not seen her last night. He knew every inch of her body but had never seen her. He felt ashamed that the feelings were all coming back. He had put himself in this position. It was all his fault. Yes, mea culpa.. my fault. My grievous fault. He would make it right somehow. She never said another word to him. She left , slamming the door on her way out.. and he felt the slamming of the door as though she had slapped him.
A few minutes later he went to the dining room and saw Danny and Michelle sitting so close that they looked like one person. How was he ever going to see them the same way again. He felt as though everyone in the room knew. Danny would certainly see the difference in him. He always knew Ray better than anyone else in his life.
Danny stood up and shook his hand. "Ray, sit down .. we have already ordered.. but the waitress should be back in a minute. "
Ray sat down and tried to make small talk. Three or four times Danny said "Ray are you still with us.. ?"
He ate his breakfast without tasting it. He listened to Danny and Michelle talk about running into the Lewis's ,about seeing a castle, about every other thing they had done.. and didn't really comprehend any of it. He kept seeing her face.
She wanted only to rid herself of the memory. She went to the dining room and as she entered she saw him sitting with Michelle and Danny. She wondered how he knew them. Was he from Springfield too.. oh please no.. she dared not ask god .. this was a joke..
Josh and Reva entered the dining room and greeted Cassie with a hug.
"What is wrong , sis.. you look like you have been hit by a truck" Reva asked with concern in her voice.
Cassie fainted.
Josh and Reva knelt by her side. The waiter came to them with water. "Did they need a doctor?" he asked.
Cassie came to slowly and then she remembered. She asked Josh "Who is that man with Michelle and Danny?"
Josh glanced over and saw Michelle talking rapidly to Ray who was staring at them.
"That is Ray Santos, Danny's cousin. He was recently ordained I think. The whole family was at his first mass and some bomb went off. Nearly killed everyone. They never did find out who was responsible. You have heard of the Santos family, right?" Josh whispered.
Cassie felt faint again. Not only is he a priest, now he is connected to a mob orginization. Blake told her all about the Santos family.
She stood up and Reva told her she needed food. "Let's sit down Cassie, I think you need more than water. Your as pale as a ghost. "
Ray watched as they sat down at a table in the far corner. Michelle and Danny waived at them. Michelle said" We should invite them to sit with us"
Before Ray realized how it would sound he said"No"
Danny looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "What is up with you today, cousin.. you are more than down in the dumps.. you're downright .. cranky" Danny laughed.
Ray explained that he wasn't feeling well, must be the change in climate. He excused himself and left. Michelle and Danny looked at each other and shook their heads. They had never seen Ray act like this , he was always so calm and self assured. Not today.
