Marshall Santos is kneeling down beside a grave marker in Boot Hill Cemetery just outside Dodge City. He mulls over a few things. "Around Dodge City and in the western territories, there is just one way to handle all the killers and the spoilers, and that is with a US Marshall and the smell of gun smoke. This is Mannysmoke, the transcribed story of the violence that moved west with young America and the story of a man who moved with it. I am that man, Danny "Matt Dillion" Santos, United States Marshall. Out here, I remind myself of how violence always ends, buried in the rim of a nation on the edge of the wild frontier. Some were slaughtered aimlessly, the rest I killed. I'm a lawman and a US Marshall. Law comes hard to the frontier and men like these did not want it. And there are more men alive today who will come to Dodge City that do not want it. They are the drifters and the lawless and they have to be dealt with. I am the first man they look for and the last one they want to meet. It is a chancy job, and it makes a man watchful and a little lonely."
Deputy Marshall Jesse Blue knocks at the Marshall's hotel room. "Marshall, you'd best suit up and come quick. Last night someone took 3 broodmares and one of the Towers Saloon owners, Beth Raines. Matt "Quint" Reardon is hopping around like a flea on a hot skillet. Some of the townsfolk are angry too. Jim "Newly" LeMay has offered his services up as a temporary deputy. I told him that you would have to make that decision. Are you up Marshall, do you hear me, should I come back?"
"No, wait I will walk over to the livery with you, Jesse." Danny exited his room and walked down the hallway with the deputy. He finished strapping on his one holstered gun belt and walked past Miss. Vicki. "No time for breakfast this morning, ma'am. I'll be back later on this evening."
The Marshall and his deputy met with the townsfolk gathering outside Matt's blacksmith shop and livery. Some folks were talking about a posse, especially those men who stabled their mares in the livery last night. A mare in estrus was a valuable commodity in these parts especially if it was a thoroughbred mare. Danny questioned the townsfolk about Beth Raines, it was the consensus by all, including Lillian Raines, that the mares should be found first. If Beth truly was abducted, it was most likely that she was already over the territory lines and into Oklahoma territory or even close to Texas state lines by now. It was hard telling what the person(s) taking her had in mind but any of the alternatives were unsavory. No matter, her abduction was now a matter for the Texas Rangers.
The Marshall observed Mrs. Reid standing awful close to Alan Spaulding. It was not any of his business but seeing them this morning made him realize there was no way Alan was up to any horse stealing last evening. More than likely, Alan was up to some other hijinks and it was not wailing out cowpoke tunes either. Danny motioned to Holly Reid who came forward, wrote down the Marshall's messages to the Texas Rangers authority officials and went back to her offices to send the telegrams.
The Marshall convinced everyone that a posse would just slow down the process. Instead, he would go out with the deputy and the temporarily deputized Jim LeMay to investigate. Danny was a good tracker; he learned this type of relentless pursuit as a young boy from the best native trackers in the west. If the broodmares were within 100 miles, he would pick up the trail before midday. Jim, Jesse and he agreed to meet back at the livery in an hour to setoff on the trail. First, he needed to talk to Miss Michelle Bauer.
Danny finds Michelle at the boarding house helping Eleni finish the morning chores. He asks to speak to her and they go and sit outside on the boarding house steps.
"Michelle, I would like to apologize to you for last night. It will not happen again."
"What won't happen Danny, your killing men or your getting their blood all over my dress and hands?"
Danny tried to control his emotions. "Michelle I've never felt for anyone the things I've got going through my head and my heart right now. However, you have to understand, I am a US Marshall. I told you all these things when we first met. I thought you understood the nature of my job. I am little more than a law and peacekeeper for this territory. And yes, sometimes I am also just a hired gun for the US government. I take my duty seriously. You've got to understand this is who I am, Michelle."
"Marshall you scared me yesterday and then I couldn't get the blood off my shirtwaist or off my hands." Danny reached out and took hold of her hands, started to stroke them lovingly, he kneaded his fingers through hers, and as he did so, she felt a small jolt like a shock go through her body. It was like magic when he slowly drew his fingers through her hand and interlaced his fingers with hers, it was enchantment.
He continued to talk to her quietly telling her his feelings and stroking her hands, then her forearms. He put his head against her forehead and continued the murmurings. Michelle felt transported by the power of this man's melodic voice.
She leaned towards him not caring if others saw or noticed or if this made her wanton. She bent towards him listening to his voice and she felt those butterflies dancing around in her stomach again, she put her head against his shoulder and he put his arm around her then. He stroked the tendrils of hair away from her neck and traced the line of her neck from her jaw down to her collarbone. Then he began to slowly massage and draw his fingers up and down her arms. She leaned in closer to him, slowly feeling small shudders go through her body, slow shocks of quickening. He looked down at her in a few minutes and kissed her lips, a sweet kiss. She drew her hand up to his nape and tried to pull him in closer for a deeper exchange. He pulled back and said, "Wait up," then fished around in his jacket pocket and gave her a white box tied with blue ribbon. She opened the box and found it contained a long gold chain with a key on the end. She looked up at him questioningly and he said, "Michelle, this is the key to my heart, will you take it and keep it with you as a token of my esteem?"
Michelle shook her head as if to bring some sense and clarity back into her mind. "Danny are you saying you want me to consider a future with you?"
He nodded his head yes. "Michelle it is like I said before I've never felt like this before. I always thought I would be alone all my life. I thought that was what being a Marshall was all about, accepting a duty like a monk or a friar accepts his role in the church. You have made helped me to think or to hope that maybe I could have more. Meeting you even has me thinking that perhaps a family with you and a whole passel full of kids and animals and land might be possible and not just some outlandish impossible dream. Could you, would you take this and at least consider a future with me? Besides making a good living wage, I could provide for you in other ways too and give you what you need. In addition, I know you are a teacher first, I want you to continue doing what you love, what means something to you. There is nothing in me that wants you to change into anything you're not."
Michelle took her hands away from his and steeled her body away from his. He took hold of her hands again and placed small kisses into her palms. Danny continued to make his case, "Michelle, for me it is you or nothing. I do not want another woman, never have, I am not the kind of man that hangs out in saloons for anything other than a beer or a good game of cards. I want you alone and I am scared, terrified to be opening myself up to you like this but I just feel we are so intertwined almost like grapevines, we are interlocked, I know you can feel it too."
Michelle, looked away and then said, "No, Danny I cannot take your gift. I cannot take responsibility for nor can I take the key to your heart, not now, maybe not ever. I cannot live my life like this with a man who is just a hair's breath away from being a criminal himself. What is the difference between what you do for the government by killing people and what those bank robbers were doing? All of you were willing to kill the other if you had to and you did Danny. You killed those men. It does not matter to me if they were breaking the law. I just don't think I could ever learn to live with someone who killed people for a living."
Danny was starting to get angry. He felt he had made his case and now she was telling him that despite his feelings and her own, she could not accept him the part of him that was elemental to his nature. "Well, honey I guess that is that then," he said. "Marshalling is part of me, I felt even as a child that I was born to do this work. My job is part of the package that makes up Danny Santos, the man. I am not a piecework quilt that you can pick apart and patch up with the pieces you like. This is a part of me and I cannot change it. Sure, I could lie to myself and to you but being away for those three weeks allowed me a lot of time for thinking and I will not lie to you or to myself. There is a part of me, a fundamental part of me that needs to do this work. I cannot and will not change it just like I would not ask you to stop loving your brother or to quit teaching."
The Marshall continued, "I want to be with you Michelle in a powerful way. But for this to work you'll have to accept me for what I am and for what I do. While I am being so honest, perhaps you should know that I am shot regularly, luckily the wounds are usually superficial. The pay is good but there are no guarantees and the hours are long and indeterminable. I worked as a kid for the 3-Bar Ranch and knew then that I liked this way of living in the west."
"When I served in the Union army I came to the realization too that life is short and needs to be lived not feared. Michelle, I only shoot a man in cold blood if there is no other choice. But I've killed men before and I will again. It is my job. Half the time when I have to do work outside this territory, I use a different name, Matt Kimble. Often I do dangerous secretive work; I do a lot of traveling and am gone sometimes for long periods. That is why I had resigned myself to a life spent alone. Nevertheless, I have never loved a woman before, never wanted to be with her every minute of the day. I cannot promise you anything, Michelle, other than my undying love for you and the promise that I will do anything within my power to make you happy for the time we are together. Maybe I will change with your love, that is all I can offer."
Danny continued, he was wound up now and it felt good to finally get these feelings of frustration and desire and conflict out of him, "Michelle, I get tired of this job, hell I resign on a regular basis because I get so fed up with the paperwork. I like to think that I am helping people out here. That in being dauntless and fearless in meeting my adversaries who are trying to threaten the rest of these people's way of life, I am doing something good. I always have to stay close inside of myself because if I ever let down my guard, the enemy will smell the fear and if you were with me you would smell the fear too and then you would back away from me. If I get spooked or afraid then I or any man in my position is lost to the work forever. Heck, it is not easy being a hired gun but someone has to do it."
"Michelle, I am thinking of quitting the Marshall business in a few years and may take up ranching like my cousins. However, I cannot make any promises. Still I want you to know that you make me want to be a better man. After meeting you, I want to reset my moral compass. The things I see in you and respect in you are those things which I think we both share; a sense of justice, sincerity, truth and a belief in this way of living."
"Well, okay Michelle I've said my piece, thanks for listening. Often for my job I have to lie, cheat and steal and you already know that it is not pretty. If this will ever work between us, it will have to be based on your trusting me a lot more. Can I ask you a question, would you prefer that I had lied to you today and made you promises I could never keep just so we could be happy for a little while versus taking a chance on love and trust and being happy forever?"
Michelle looked at Danny and tears formed in her eyes. "Yes, Danny I am sorry but if you came to me today and told me that you'd stop this Marshalling business and we could start anew, I'd believe you and I would give you my heart and accept yours. I know you think I am a young woman and terribly naive and I guess with this admission, I am. I am so sorry Danny; I just cannot do anything but promise you to think about all of this. Nothing more today okay?" She stepped up on her tiptoes and chastely kissed his lips.
Michelle realized she hurt him deeply today. She wished she could change and accommodate his life and take back all she had told him today. "Maybe in time," she said as he walked back towards the livery.
"Michelle, in this part of the country and in this day in age, time is not something in abundant supply darling. I will see you soon. Farewell."
File this lesson under food for thought/random ideas/topics for discussion.
The television show, "Gunsmoke," ran on television from 1955 until 1975. It spanned the changes of two generations and carried its audience from the white-bread wonder world of "Ozzie and Harriet" to the tragicomedies like "All in the Family." The show survived Beatniks, Elvis, the Beatles, both the antiwar and antigun movement, youth's fear and protest against authority, Watergate etc. How did this show survive for twenty years? Additionally, why is it so popular today in reruns? Probably because the show's two themes were so simple and when weaved together, become threads that everyone needs. Many people say we need such a moral tale again. "Gunsmoke" helps us understand the consequences of our actions by posing two distinct albeit contradictory ideals and helps us sort out the first and learn to progress to the second.
The first theme is that the gun is smoking! The bullet has left the chamber there is no turning back, what the heck does an individual do now? The show helps us examine this question on a weekly basis. The immature response to mistakes or reckless judgment is to fantasize that we can return to the scene of the crime and erase what happened. "Gunsmoke" presents us with the realistic alternative: face the reality, prepare for repercussions, accept the consequences, and learn for future personal growth. The name of the show speaks of the peculiar predicament of what to do right after the gun is fired and the gun's smoke clears, or as Alexander the Great said upon readying to cross the Rubicon, "the die is cast, we cannot turn back." Prevention is no longer relevant; it is time instead to deal with the consequences. How does one go on with one's life after the bullet is already spent? For many of us the normal reaction is impulsive reaction. "Gunsmoke" patiently counsels action, not reaction.
The heart of the show deals with confrontations between one of the principal characters of the show, usually the Marshall, and an outlaw or troubled soul. Usually the individual is on a tragic downward-spiraled course of greed, envy, lust, and/or desperation. The person usually feels they cannot back down without losing face. This simple lesson is repeated week in and week in reruns to help recondition our own judgment in the middle of a crisis. The lesson is that there is never "a point of no return," and to stake our belief in the idea that there is indeed a point of no return is stubborn and self-destructive. On the television show, those with this kind of arrogance always face the proverbial music by facing down Marshall Matt Dillon. That person more than likely ends up buried on Boot Hill.
The second alternative theme or thread, which runs through "Gunsmoke," is the simpler message that alternatives are always available to thwart violence in the first place. Gunsmoke's Matt Dillon is a solid and mature individual who cares about his job and the people he works for in Dodge City. He is in touch with his feelings and is an integrated intelligent individual familiar with both his animus and his feminine side. He is also able to become emotionally close in relationships. Dillon is surrounded by those in the town who he helped to salvage; Kitty Russell, depressed saloonkeeper, and Chester, his moody deputy with the pronounced limp to name just two friends.
Dillon is a role model for good authority. He prefers peaceful remedies to violence but he has no problems in fulfilling his official obligations to the law. He understands and tries to teach the viewer through his actions that once the bullet leaves the gun's chamber it is often too late to take remedial action. Better to put down the gun and mediate the issues before violence occurs and not after. It may surprise some to realize that in fact Gunsmoke was and is realistic television: women became widows, families lost their fathers, children were orphaned, people got sick and never healed, farms and herds were lost, freak accidents occurred and people won and lost fortunes. Life is not always better for those living by a moral compass unless one's own ethical nature is factored into the equation. The show reminds us that even if we put down the gun before we fire it, there will still be consequences. Our stopping to think before taking reckless action will not save us, but it does show us that the consequences we face will be less severe than had an individual continued his or her course towards violence.
Much of this lesson was excerpted with permission from the book, "Why We Watch: Watch Your Way to Wellness," by Dr. Will Miller, Nick at Nite's Teletherapist.
